Conflict Avoidance: Five Things You Can Control In theMeantime

Dr. Chris Wilson explains how avoiding conflict can drainyour energy, keep unresolved issues looping in your mind, and strain relationships. She offers five ways to regain some peace and agency while you wait to address the conflict thoughtfully.

Timestamps

00:02 - Conflict as an arrow pointing to what we need tolearn
01:53 - Why we avoid difficult conversations
03:36 - How unresolved conflict affects relationships and well-being
04:32 - Four ways conflict avoidance drains your energy
07:20 - Five things you can control while you wait
08:10 - Stop rehearsing and focus on what’s within your control
09:39 - Seek an internal conclusion, even without the other person’s response
10:09 - Recognize the avoidance-rumination cycle
11:35 - Use a conflict recovery statement
12:59 - Choose a next step from a calmer state
13:25 - Pray, listen, and consider praying for the other person
14:03 - Make space between stimulus and response
15:32 - Use movement and relaxation to settle your nervous system
16:38 - Preparing to address conflict calmly in the moment

Contact Chris at Iheartresolution@gmail.com for conflict coaching or to answer any questions you may have.

What Do Weeds and Conflict Have in Common?

This episode explores how weeds and conflict follow similarpatterns: what gets ignored can spread, tangle, and become much harder to handle later.

Dr. Chris Wilson explains common conflict triggers, thebiology of escalation, and a simple APT framework for responding with more awareness and less reactivity.

She discusses the origins of conflict triggers, how to spot the early signs, and how to connect the trigger to an old wound or unmet need.

She shares the APT framework for handling triggers:Awareness of physical warning signs, Pause before reacting, and Trace the emotion back to its root cause.

The episode closes with a suggestion to use a lens of lovefor dealing with conflict more skillfully, and practical reflection questions.

It’s All About Chemistry link https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ENCBUTenUOg&t=3s

In this episode, Dr. Chris Wilson explores the profound effects our thoughts have on brain chemistry and overall health.

Discover practical strategies to shift from toxic thinking to a more positive mental state and learn how these mental shifts can influence physical health and relationships.

7 Ways to Begin Improving Your Brain Chemistry

1. Practice mindfulness, mindful redirecting, and prayer.

2. Exercise regularly – endorphins, dopamine, serotonin

3. Get good sleep – research shows sleep deprivation has a negative impact on brain chemistry

4. Eat well – 90% Serotonin is produced in the gut. Feed that gut microbiome with plant-based real food.

5. Practice gratitude – Easy to do. Instant dopamine, serotonin, and oxytocin

6. Say something kind to yourself (and others!) –Releases dopamine, supports serotonin and oxytocin and lowering stress hormones like cortisol.

7. Reward yourself for a job well done - This releases dopamine and supports motivation to continue or take on other challenges

Resources:

How thinking affects your brain chemistry, Vilhauer, Jennice, PhD., April 10, 2023 https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/living-forward/202304/how-your-thinking-affects-your-brain-chemistry

What Happy People Know, Baker, Dan (2003)

Aggravating mood disorders: https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC9020513/ -

Source: Mark Hyman, MDhttps://share.google/JhFDsPx7vCAgDCuui