Recommended Episodes

• Secret #62: The Connection Paradox with James Cordova
• Secret #64: Moral Outrage with Kurt Gray
• Secret #70: So Many Paradoxes with Dr. Emma Waddington and Dr. Chris McCurry

Many of us are going about our daily lives while quietly feeling that something is deeply wrong in the world. We say we are fine. We scroll. We joke. We compartmentalize. And yet there is a sinking feeling that things are not normal.

In this conversation, Jonathan Kanter explores the disconnection paradox and the concept of hypernormalization. Why do we pretend everything is okay when it is not? When does normalcy protect us, and when does it shrink our lives? Together, we unpack avoidance, helplessness, activism, values, and what it means to pivot toward action without collapsing into hopelessness.

Topics Discussed:

• hypernormalization and pretending everything is fine
• emotional avoidance and shrinking behavioral repertoires
• accept, grieve, and pivot toward new goals
• values based action in times of social crisis

View extended shownotes here

Struggling with your child’s big feelings? Our new children’s workbooks are here to help kids and parents handle worry, disappointment, and anger using practical, compassionate tools. Follow the journeys of Justin Case, the Glumm Twins, and Max Cross as they learn that tough emotions are normal and manageable. Find all three workbooks at bookstores everywhere and give your family the support they deserve.

• ORDER Max Cross Gets Unstuck from Anger: An Acceptance and Commitment Therapy Workbook for Ages 8-12 (ACT Workbook series for kids)
• ORDER Justin Case Sits with Anxiety: An Acceptance and Commitment Therapy Workbook for Ages 8-12 (ACT Workbook Series for Kids)
• ORDER The Glumm Twins Unhook from Sadness: An Acceptance and Commitment Therapy Workbook for Ages 8-12 (ACT Workbook Series for Kids)

Recommended Episodes:

• Secret #58: Raising a Self-Driven Child with Dr. William Stixrud & Ned Johnson
• Secret #61: Reimagining Anger with Russell Kolts
• Secret #70: So Many Paradoxes with Dr. Emma Waddington and Dr. Chris McCurry

Most people believe confidence is something you either have or don’t have. In this episode, confidence coach Michael Herold explains why confidence is actually built by doing hard things while anxiety is present — not after it disappears.

Key Takeaways

• confidence grows through action, not mindset
• anxiety signals what matters, not what must be avoided
• competence follows confidence, not the other way around
• values-based action builds real psychological flexibility

View extended shownotes here

Struggling with your child’s big feelings? Our new children’s workbooks are here to help kids and parents handle worry, disappointment, and anger using practical, compassionate tools. Follow the journeys of Justin Case, the Glumm Twins, and Max Cross as they learn that tough emotions are normal and manageable. Find all three workbooks at bookstores everywhere and give your family the support they deserve.

• ORDER Max Cross Gets Unstuck from Anger: An Acceptance and Commitment Therapy Workbook for Ages 8-12 (ACT Workbook series for kids)
• ORDER Justin Case Sits with Anxiety: An Acceptance and Commitment Therapy Workbook for Ages 8-12 (ACT Workbook Series for Kids)
• ORDER The Glumm Twins Unhook from Sadness: An Acceptance and Commitment Therapy Workbook for Ages 8-12 (ACT Workbook Series for Kids)

Recommended Episodes

• Secret #5: Body Shame with Emily Sandoz
• Secret #7: Parental Guilt with Dr. Yael Schonbrun
• Secret #26: Victim Blame with Dr. Amy Beddows

Guilt and shame often linger long after trauma, quietly shaping how we see ourselves and our relationships. In this episode, clinical psychologist Dr. Carolyn Allard explains why guilt and shame can be adaptive—and how they become harmful when they overstay their welcome.

Key Takeaways

• Trauma-related guilt and shame can begin as survival strategies but become non-adaptive over time
• Non-adaptive guilt and shame (NAGS) fuel avoidance, people-pleasing, and self-blame
• Hindsight bias intensifies guilt by judging past actions with information we didn’t have at the time
• Values-based decision making helps replace guilt-driven choices with intentional living

View extended shownotes here

Struggling with your child’s big feelings? Our new children’s workbooks are here to help kids and parents handle worry, disappointment, and anger using practical, compassionate tools. Follow the journeys of Justin Case, the Glumm Twins, and Max Cross as they learn that tough emotions are normal and manageable. Find all three workbooks at bookstores everywhere and give your family the support they deserve.

• ORDER Max Cross Gets Unstuck from Anger: An Acceptance and Commitment Therapy Workbook for Ages 8-12 (ACT Workbook series for kids)
• ORDER Justin Case Sits with Anxiety: An Acceptance and Commitment Therapy Workbook for Ages 8-12 (ACT Workbook Series for Kids)
• ORDER The Glumm Twins Unhook from Sadness: An Acceptance and Commitment Therapy Workbook for Ages 8-12 (ACT Workbook Series for Kids)