This episode is a vulnerable, honest, real conversation about what happens when you finally stop running from yourself, even when nothing is technically "wrong".

I’m sharing a very raw moment from my own life a night where I noticed myself wanting to escape. Not because I wasn’t grateful. Not because my life was falling apart. But because things were actually good… and I still felt empty.

I want to talk about what no one else really mentions.

I am deeply grateful for my life. I can see how good I have it. And at the same time, my nervous system felt unsettled, restless, and disconnected. I found myself trying to use gratitude to move out of the moment and to override what I was feeling instead of staying with it.

I wanted to travel impulsively. ( I know myself well enough to know that Mexico and a margarita have been a coping mechanism)

I considered drinking wine I didn’t even like therefor I would have been settling and numbing.

I vegged out with TV that wasn’t doing anything for me.

All these subtle ways of saying: I shouldn’t feel this way let me move past it.

And for the first time, I caught the pattern while it was happening.

Instead of bypassing my emotions with gratitude, distraction, or positive thinking, I chose to stay. I turned off the TV. I didn’t drink. I didn’t run. But I cried ... a lot.. stopped and cried again. I felt. I let myself be with the emptiness without judging it or trying to fix it.

In this episode, we talk about:

• Why you can feel grateful and empty at the same time

• How gratitude can quietly become a form of emotional bypassing

• Why the nervous system resists calm, stability, and “good enough”

• How self-sabotage shows up as restlessness, impulse, or escape

• What it actually means to meet yourself exactly where you are

• How nervous system safety is required to hold more money, love, expansion and your next level

This episode is especially for the woman who:

• Feels guilty for struggling when her life looks “good” on paper

• Uses gratitude as a tool but still feels disconnected or empty

• Is calling in more but doesn’t yet feel safe to hold it

• Is ready to stop fixing, forcing, and bypassing her inner experience

What I realized that night is this:

When your system has been wired for chaos, peace can feel unfamiliar. And when things are going well, your body may try to recreate movement just to feel familiar again.

The shift didn’t come from gratitude alone.

It came from self-trust.

From letting myself feel without needing to change it. From staying instead of running. From allowing gratitude to coexist with discomfort not cancel it out.

And that’s how I know something is changing.

Because I didn’t run.

If you’ve ever wondered why you feel the urge to sabotage, escape, or create chaos when things are going well this episode will help you understand what’s happening on a nervous system level, and how to begin building the capacity to stay.

Because the moment you stop running…

is usually the moment everything starts to shift.

Thanks for being here :)

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If you’re in a season where everything feels heavier than it should and you’re quietly losing connection to your goals this episode is for you.

This is not a motivational talk or a reminder to think positive. This episode is about real hope. The grounded kind. The kind that still exists when you’re tired disconnected and unsure how to want again without hurting yourself.

In this episode we talk about why hope disappears during dark seasons and why that doesn’t mean you’ve failed. We explore why forcing belief backfires and creates more disconnection especially for ambitious self aware people who have already tried everything. You’ll hear a redefinition of hope that doesn’t require certainty positivity or pretending you’re okay.

This episode is for you if you feel emotionally disconnected from your dreams overwhelmed by expectation or afraid to want again after disappointment. It’s a reminder that numbness is not the end of desire it’s protection. And that real hope isn’t loud or dramatic it’s quiet steady and rooted in staying with yourself.

Inside this episode you’ll hear
Why losing hope is often self protection not giving up
What hope actually is when belief doesn’t feel accessible
Why wanting again can feel unsafe after disappointment
How to stay connected to yourself and your goals without forcing motivation
A grounded reframe that brings safety back to desire

If this episode meets you in a dark moment let it. You don’t need to feel ready or certain. You just need to stay.

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Expansion is not gentle. It is not passive. And it does not happen while you’re standing still.

In this solo episode of I'll Keep You Wild, we explore expansion as a tug of war between who you’ve been and who you’re becoming. Your past identity and your future self are pulling on opposite ends of the rope, and the middle is being slowly worn down. That dark, uncomfortable middle space is not failure. It’s friction. It’s the moment before the rope snaps.

I dive into why growth feels so heavy when you keep feeding both versions of yourself, and why true expansion requires a full-bodied commitment to the future you, even when it feels terrifying, uncertain, and unfamiliar. The unknown is scary because it asks you to release control, safety, and the identity that once kept you alive.

We talk about the grief that comes with saying goodbye to the version of you that got you here, and why honoring that version doesn’t mean taking them with you. Some identities are meant to be thanked, released, and set free. The cutting of the rope is not loss. It’s liberation.

If you’re in the in-between, the liminal space, the place where nothing feels settled and everything feels raw, this episode is for you. Expansion demands your attention, your energy, and your devotion. And whichever identity you feed is the one that wins.

This is an episode about transformation, nervous system expansion, identity shifts, and becoming the version of you that can hold more, be more, and experience what you desire.

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