Rule 2: Dreams & goals, know what you want.

Ten years ago I wrote this chapter from the middle of my own reinvention. I'd just walked away from a 13-year career in the travel industry and was building something new from scratch. I had no idea what I was doing, but I knew what I wanted.

Most of the women I work with now have forgotten what they want. They've been wanting things for everyone else for so long that when I ask what THEY want, they can't answer. If that's you, this chapter is for you.

This is where goal setting stops being a corporate exercise and starts being an act of coming back to yourself. The dream worksheets in this chapter still work. They're the same ones I use with clients today.

At the end I share my 2026 reflections on why dreaming is a nervous system function, and why you can't access what you want when you're stuck in survival mode.

The full audiobook is available on all the audiobook platforms if you want to jump ahead, or you can get the paperback here: https://amzn.to/4Aw5F6w and the workbook that goes with it here: https://amzn.to/4hfqg63. The exercises are where the real work happens. The exercises need to be done, not just listened to.

As always, I would love to hear from you, what you get out of each chapter, any insights, any thoughts.

www.iamjenwilson.com

www.instagram.com/iam.jenwilson

www.facebook.com/iamjenwilson

www.youtube.com/iamjenwilson

Rule 1: Know who you are.

I opened this book with a chapter about masks.

The work mask. The mum mask. The everything's-fine mask. We wear so many of them that by the time we get to our forties we've forgotten which one is actually us. And "just be yourself" is the worst advice anyone has ever given you, because how are you meant to be yourself when you don't know who that is anymore?

This chapter is where we start pulling those masks off. The Wheel of Happiness exercise in here is the one I still use with clients today, and I get my clients to do it monthly, to help guide them for the month ahead.

At the end of the chapter I share some 2026 reflections on what I'd add now that I've spent the last decade with my hands on hundreds of women's bodies, watching the nervous system tell the truth that the mind hasn't caught up with yet.

The full audiobook is available on all the audiobook platforms if you want to jump ahead, or you can get the paperback here: https://amzn.to/4Aw5F6w and the workbook that goes with it here: https://amzn.to/4hfqg63. The exercises are where the real work happens. The exercises need to be done, not just listened to.

As always, I would love to hear from you, what you get out of each chapter, any insights, any thoughts.

www.iamjenwilson.com

www.instagram.com/iam.jenwilson

www.facebook.com/iamjenwilson

www.youtube.com/iamjenwilson

The Creation Story.

Before I could write the nine rules, I had to live them. This chapter is the story of how the book came to be. It's the messy, honest version of how a Glasgow girl in her early 30's went from divorced, partying, and pretending she was fine, to writing a book about sorting your shit.

2010 was the year my marriage ended. My husband moved back to Australia. I stayed. I threw myself into work and nights out and told everyone I was absolutely fine. I was very good at fine. I was very good at numbing.

Ten years on, I've added some 2026 reflections about what I couldn't see at the time, and what I know now about the body, the nervous system, and the way we survive things before we understand them.

If you're standing at the start of your own reinvention, or you're in the middle of it wondering if you'll come out the other side, start here.

The full audiobook is available on all the audiobook platforms if you want to jump ahead, or you can get the paperback here: https://amzn.to/4Aw5F6w and the workbook that goes with it here: https://amzn.to/4hfqg63. The exercises are where the real work happens. The exercises need to be done, not just listened to.

As always, I would love to hear from you, what you get out of each chapter, any insights, any thoughts.

www.iamjenwilson.com

www.instagram.com/iam.jenwilson

www.facebook.com/iamjenwilson

www.youtube.com/iamjenwilson