In this episode of The H.I.P. Podcast, Shaya sits down with Tzipora Schiffer, LCSW, for a deeply honest conversation about attachment trauma, therapy, and what happens when the place meant to heal becomes confusing, painful, or even shaming.

Tzipora shares her personal journey — from growing up feeling "fine on the outside but profoundly different on the inside," to years of searching for help without having language for what was actually wrong. She speaks openly about navigating therapy as someone with attachment wounds: the shame of needing connection, the terror of being "too much," and the devastating impact of therapists who were kind but unable to hold clear, safe boundaries.

This episode explores how attachment trauma often doesn't come from a single obvious event, but from subtle, repeated experiences of emotional dismissal — and how those wounds are reenacted inside the therapy relationship itself. Together, Shaya and Tzipora unpack why anxiety, obsession, dependency, and fear of abandonment are not signs of pathology, but signals of a nervous system that learned to survive without reliable connection.

Tzipora also shares the pivotal moments that led to healing: advocating for her child when professionals were wrong, learning to trust her own inner knowing, and finally experiencing therapy where the relationship itself — not skills, diagnoses, or behavior correction — became the vehicle for change.

This episode is for anyone who has ever:

• Felt younger than their age in therapy
  
  

• Been confused or ashamed by how much they needed their therapist
  
  

• Wondered why therapy didn't help — or made things worse
  
  

• Struggled to trust their own inner authority
  
  

• Felt unseen despite "doing everything right"

• Wondered whether secure attachment is still possible after a lifetime of disconnection
  
  

00:00 – Introduction and Tzipora's background
04:30 – "Not having a story" — and still deserving healing
12:10 – When therapy doesn't have language for relational pain
23:45 – Shame, attachment needs, and feeling "too much"
38:20 – Boundaries without attunement (and why they can harm)
55:00 – Advocacy, intuition, and reclaiming inner authority
1:12:40 – Healing through relationship, not compliance
1:25:00 – Closing reflections on therapy, compassion, and growth

(Timestamps are approximate and may vary slightly by platform.)

• Why attachment wounds often go unnamed
  
  

• How therapy can unintentionally recreate abandonment
  
  

• The difference between boundaries and emotional safety
  
  

• Why dependency isn't created in therapy — it's revealed
  
  

• How shame blocks healing more than symptoms ever could
  
  

• What trauma-informed, relational therapy actually looks like
  
  

• How clients learn to trust themselves again
  
  

If this episode stirred something in you, you're not alone.
You don't need a dramatic story to deserve care.
And healing doesn't mean becoming less needy — it often means finally being met.

Your Voice Matters

If this episode brought something up for you and you'd like to share a reflection or response, you're invited to do so below:

Click here to leave feedback

You can share as much or as little as you want, and you can remain anonymous.

Continue the conversation:
I share reflections on attachment, trauma, and the therapy relationship on Instagram @shayahecht

About H.I.P. Counseling Center:

Learn more about our trauma-informed practice and offerings at www.hipcounseling.com or on instagram @hipcounselingcenter.

Subscribe & Review:
If this conversation resonated with you, please subscribe to the HIP Podcast on your favorite podcast app. Leaving a review helps others who need to hear these stories find their way here.

Have you ever sat in a therapist's office and felt younger than your age, confused by your own reactions, or deeply ashamed of how much you need? For those with attachment trauma, therapy itself can stir up the very wounds it's meant to heal. In this raw and insightful conversation, we give voice to what often goes unspoken inside the therapy room.
In this second episode of the HIP Podcast, host Shaya Hecht is joined by Chaya Morgenstern, a social work student with deep lived experience as a therapy client. Together, they explore the complex journey of long-term therapy while navigating shame, self-blame, and an anxious attachment system. They discuss why needing connection can feel deeply shameful, how being a "good client" can be a trauma response (fawning), and the crucial difference between boundaries that create safety and walls around a therapist's heart. This is a conversation about how real healing unfolds through the messy, human process of relationship missteps, rupture, and repair.

In this episode, you'll hear about:

• The challenging transition from being a client to becoming a clinician.

• How early negative therapy experiences can shape your belief that "something is wrong with you."

• The moment of discovering what it actually means to feel emotions, not just talk about them.

• Why inconsistent connection in therapy can re-trigger attachment wounds.

• Navigating the painful end of a long-term therapeutic relationship and finding your own voice.

Episode Timestamps:
00:00 – Opening Hook & Introduction to the Topic
03:05 – Chaya's Introduction: From Client to Social Work Student
12:30 – The Role of "Fawning" and Being the "Good Client"
22:15 – Rupture, Repair, and the Therapist's Capacity
35:40 – The End of a Therapeutic Relationship and Finding Closure
50:10 – Key Takeaways for Clients and Therapists
55:00 – Final Thoughts & Outro

Your Voice Matters

If this episode brought something up for you and you'd like to share a reflection or response, you're invited to do so below:

Click here to leave feedback

You can share as much or as little as you want, and you can remain anonymous.

Continue the conversation:
I share reflections on attachment, trauma, and the therapy relationship on Instagram @shayahecht

About H.I.P. Counseling Center:

Learn more about our trauma-informed practice and offerings at www.hipcounseling.com or on instagram @hipcounselingcenter.

Subscribe & Review:
If this conversation resonated with you, please subscribe to the HIP Podcast on your favorite podcast app. Leaving a review helps others who need to hear these stories find their way here.

Have you ever sat in a therapist's office and felt like a child, been told you're "too much," or feared your own dependency? When you carry attachment trauma, the therapeutic relationship itself can become the ground where your oldest wounds are painfully and powerfully re-lived.

In this first episode of the HIP Podcast, host Shaya Hecht is joined by Hadas, a trauma and somatic coach with deep lived experience as both a client and a clinician. Together, they explore the intense push and pull that defines therapy for the anxiously attached the craving for connection clashing with a terror of needing it. They discuss why common diagnoses often miss the mark, how "self-regulation" must be preceded by "co-regulation," and what it truly takes to build earned security from a foundation of insecurity. This is a conversation that reframes the chaos of therapy not as failure, but as the necessary crucible for profound healing.

In this episode, you'll hear about:

• Why feeling "crazy" or regressed in therapy can be a sign of deep work beginning.

• The critical difference between a therapist who rescues, one who withdraws, and one who provides secure attachment.

• How to tell if your "neediness" is a trauma response or a human longing for healthy connection.

• Hadas's powerful analogy of the wounded bird, explaining the therapist's role in healing.

• The hopeful, lived answer to whether moving from anxious to secure attachment is possible.

Episode Timestamps:
00:00 – Opening Hook & Introduction to the Topic
10:15 – Hadas's Story: The Push-Pull of Therapy with Attachment Trauma
22:30 – Co-Regulation vs. Coping Skills: A Paradigm Shift
35:00 – The "Wounded Bird" Analogy for Therapeutic Holding
48:45 – Navigating Rupture and Building Earned Security
58:20 – Key Takeaways for Clients and Therapists
01:05:00 – Final Thoughts & Outro

Your Voice Matters

If this episode brought something up for you and you'd like to share a reflection or response, you're invited to do so below:

Click here to leave feedback

You can share as much or as little as you want, and you can remain anonymous.

Continue the conversation:
I share reflections on attachment, trauma, and the therapy relationship on Instagram @shayahecht

About H.I.P. Counseling Center:

Learn more about our trauma-informed practice and offerings at www.hipcounseling.com or on instagram @hipcounselingcenter.

Subscribe & Review:
If this conversation resonated with you, please subscribe to the HIP Podcast on your favorite podcast app. Leaving a review helps others who need to hear these stories find their way here.