Intimacy isn't just sex—and for a lot of autistic and ADHD adults, dating can feel like a confusing set of unspoken rules that nobody will explain.

In this episode of Adulting With Autism, host April sits down with Mandy Hart, a Certified Sexologist and founder of Hart's Desire—Intimacy and Relationship Coaching, for a candid, compassionate conversation about shame, consent, boundaries, and connection.

Mandy blends behavioral science, public health, and trauma-empowered somatic coaching to help people reconnect with their bodies, build confidence, and create authentic intimacy on their own terms—whether that's with a partner, multiple partners, or solo. We talk about what it means to feel safe in your body, how to communicate needs and boundaries, how to discuss STIs without panic or shame, and how consent can be sexy, clear, and ongoing (not a checklist).

• Intimacy vs. sex: expanding what "connection" can mean
• Shame and self-worth: how it shows up in dating and relationships
• "Safety in your body" and nervous system regulation
• Consent skills: how to ask, how to check in, and how to make it hot (not awkward)
• Neurodivergent dating: navigating cues, boundaries, and communication
• Asexuality, sensory needs, and relationships without partner sex
• STI disclosure and sexual health conversations with compassion

• Website: https://harts-desire.com/
• Email: mandy@hearts-desire.com
• Book a free discovery call via the site
• Blog: Embodying Hart's Desire

What happens to your children, your home, your photos, and your money if something happens to you—tomorrow?

In this episode of Adulting With Autism, we sit down with Attorney M. Cecilia Amo, founder of AMO LAW Legacy Planning (Costa Mesa, California), to talk about estate planning for real life—not just paperwork that sits in a drawer. Cecilia breaks down the difference between a will and a trust, why probate can be expensive and stressful, and how to build a plan that keeps your loved ones out of court and out of conflict.

We also dig into why estate planning matters for families navigating autism, ADHD, disability, and government benefits, including how an inheritance can accidentally disrupt benefits if planning isn't done correctly—and what tools (like special needs planning) may help protect long-term stability.

Cecilia is also the author of Your After-Credits Scene: A Nerd's Guide to Wills, Trusts & Legacy, where she teaches estate planning using pop culture references (think Star Wars, Harry Potter, Marvel) to make it actually understandable.

• Estate planning myths: it's not just for the wealthy or elderly
• Will vs. trust: what each does (and doesn't do)
• Why probate is the government's "default" plan
• What happens if you're incapacitated without a power of attorney
• Kids protection planning and choosing guardians
• Why digital assets (photos, accounts) need planning too
• How to find an estate planning attorney who isn't just selling templates

• AMO LAW: https://amo-law.com/
• Book info: https://amo-law.com/aftercredits

Are you exhausted from trying to be everything to everyone—and still feeling like it's not enough?

In this episode of Adulting With Autism, host April talks with Ruth Hirshberg, former social worker and creator of Grounding with Ruth, about the real root cause behind chronic burnout and people-pleasing: core beliefs about worth.

Ruth shares how a Crohn's disease diagnosis forced her to face the truth she'd been avoiding—you can't perform your way to peace. Together, we unpack why "just set boundaries" and "just do self-care" often fails, especially for high achievers, perfectionists, and neurodivergent adults who learned early that being useful was the safest way to belong.

Ruth brings an honest, no-fluff approach—calling out toxic positivity and wellness-industry nonsense—and offers practical tools rooted in social work, breathwork, and meditation to build internal safety and sustainable self-worth.

• What people-pleasing actually is (and why it's not just "being nice")
• Why boundaries don't stick if you don't believe you're allowed to have needs
• The hidden beliefs that keep high-achievers trapped in burnout
• Self-worth vs. productivity: separating value from output
• Nervous system regulation that doesn't cost money (breathwork you can do anywhere)
• Meditation for exhausted or traumatized people (starting small, safely, and realistically)
• Toxic positivity and why "good vibes only" makes healing harder
• Community as a tool for healing shame and isolation

• Website: https://groundingwithruth.com
• Instagram/Facebook: @groundingwithruth
• Facebook Group: The Enough Project
• Podcast: Inspired Questions (interviews + guided meditations)

In this episode of Adulting With Autism, April is joined by Helene Zupanc and Beth Valdez—licensed professional counselors in Arizona with 25+ years of combined experience—about how to interrupt negative thought loops using simple, personalized mantras that actually feel authentic.

Helene and Beth are the co-authors of Sticky Note Mantras: The Art and Science of Choosing Your Thoughts, a practical mental health toolkit built from real therapy sessions: the "one thing" clients needed to remember after they walked out the door. We talk about why the brain gets stuck in repetitive patterns like "I'm not good enough," "I'm not loved," or "I can't," and how the survival brain (including the amygdala) can send false alarms based on old experiences.

This conversation includes:

• How to create mantras that work for autistic and neurodivergent adults (without toxic positivity)
• Why repetition builds new neural pathways—and what consistency realistically looks like
• Tools for regulation beyond talk therapy: somatic yoga, sound therapy, and "bottoms‑up" nervous system support
• How to "catch it, check it, change it" when the spiral starts
• Self-compassion prompts that don't feel fake—and how gratitude can shift internal dialogue
• Practical mantra examples like "That's just a brain glitch," "People will people," and "Just don't stand still."

If you want mental health strategies that are simple, research-informed, and usable on hard days—this episode delivers.

Guests: Helene Zupanc, LPC + Beth Valdez, LPC
Book: Sticky Note Mantras: The Art and Science of Choosing Your Thoughts
Website: https://stickynotemantras.com
Therapy (AZ Telehealth): Available via their website

Topics: autism and adulting, neurodivergent mental health, anxiety, OCD, ADHD, trauma, rumination, self-compassion, gratitude practice, mantras, nervous system regulation, somatic tools.

In this episode of Adulting With Autism, April talks with Princess Merrilee—Ambassador of Love, minister, existential philosopher (Ph.D.), mentor, speaker, and award‑winning international bestselling author—about what it actually means to live by love in a world that constantly triggers fear, distrust, and overwhelm.

Princess Merrilee shares the pivotal moment that shifted her life: during a painful divorce with four kids, bills stacked on the desk, and life feeling like too much—she opened her Bible and felt a clear message: "All you have to do is love." From that promise, she built a practical framework for how love shows up in daily life through communication, patience, diplomacy, and self‑mastery—especially when your nervous system wants to react first and think later.

This conversation explores why so many autistic and neurodivergent adults feel disconnected, how trust breaks through "authentic" but painful communication, and why internal safety starts with learning to pause before spiraling into worst‑case scenarios. We also discuss her concept of "The Game"—a rules‑based way to simplify the complexity of love, identify untrustworthy patterns, and stop self‑sacrificing in relationships that repeatedly cause harm.

If you've been struggling with masking, anxiety, conflict, belonging, or purpose—this episode offers a different lens: love as a practice, love as a discipline, and love as the foundation for a calmer, more connected adult life.

Guest: Princess Merrilee
Website: https://merrileeofsalana.com
Facebook: Princess Merrilee (search by name)
Book: The Game (available by request via email through her website)

Topics: autism and adulting, neurodivergent communication, emotional regulation, anxiety and overwhelm, relationships and trust, self‑forgiveness, self‑worth, purpose, spirituality and mental health, belonging.

In this episode of Adulting With Autism, we sit down with Travis Cournoyer (Lucid Motors engineer, former startup CEO, and author of Courageous Curiosity: Find the Answers Where Everyone Else Is Afraid to Look) to talk about the kind of questions autistic adults and neurodivergent people often carry in silence—the ones we're afraid will make us look "stupid," "too much," or "difficult."

Travis shares the moment that changed his life—moving from shame and silence in graduate school to building a career in high-pressure tech environments by doing the one thing many of us avoid: asking the question anyway. We unpack his definition of a "stupid question" (an honest question you've been shamed for asking), how to disrupt the shame spiral, and practical ways to start speaking up at work, in school, and in everyday life—without abandoning your authenticity.

If you've ever felt like an alien trying to survive adulthood, this one will feel like belonging.

Guest: Travis Cournoyer
Book: Courageous Curiosity (Launch: Nov 14)
Website: https://www.askanyway.org

Topics: autism & adulting, masking, communication, workplace anxiety, shame resilience, neurodivergence, self-advocacy, confidence, asking questions, authenticity.

In this episode of Adulting with Autism, April sits down with Leah Marone — psychotherapist, speaker, and author of Serial Fixer: Break Free from the Habit of Solving Other People's Problems — to unpack why autistic and neurodivergent adults are often vulnerable to people-pleasing, masking, over-accommodating, and chronic burnout.

Leah explains how "fixer mode" can start in childhood as a trauma response or learned pattern tied to love, praise, and survival — and how it becomes an exhausting loop of false ownership, hypervigilance, and anxiety.

In this conversation, we cover:

• What it really means to be a "serial fixer" and how to recognize the pattern

• Why high emotional intelligence can become premature problem-solving

• How anxiety pulls us into the past (rumination) or future (worst-case planning)

• The connection between masking, people-pleasing, and losing your authentic self

• How to set boundaries without collapsing into guilt or conflict avoidance

• Why recovery matters for autistic adults navigating overstimulation and social decoding

• Micro-regulation tools for anxiety (cold on the chest, breath, movement, blood flow shifts)

• How caregivers can support neurodivergent young adults without "over-solving"

• Practical strategies for boundaries and burnout prevention in the workplace

This episode is especially helpful for autistic adults, ADHDers, late-diagnosed individuals, caregivers, and high-achievers who feel stuck in overfunctioning and want to find their own version of calm, balance, and "enoughness."

Guest: Leah Marone
Website: leahmarone.com
Book: Serial Fixer: Break Free from the Habit of Solving Other People's Problems

If you live in a rural area, you already know the struggle: the internet will have you stuck in the dark ages… and then everybody acts surprised when you can't stream, work, or upload a thing.

In this episode of Adulting with Autism, I'm talking with Mashood Ahmad, founder and CEO of Gigabit IQ — known as the UK's "Safe Broadband Provider." Mashood has spent 25+ years in telecom and broadband, and he's on a mission to make internet access not only fast, but also safer for families.

And y'all… we get into the part parents are exhausted by: online safety. Because once kids hit the internet, it can turn into the Wild West real quick — especially for autistic and neurodivergent kids who may be more vulnerable to manipulation, grooming, cyberbullying, and unsafe content. We talk about why "basic" parental controls aren't enough when you've got 20 devices in one house, and how network-level tools (aka controls that work across your home Wi-Fi) can reduce the chaos.

We also get REAL about:

• Why "super fast fiber" isn't always super, fast, or fiber

• Roblox, in-game chats, and how "kid games" can still be unsafe

• FamilyGuard+ features like age-based filtering, screen time limits, app blocking, alerts, and VPN bypass blocking (because these kids are SMART smart)

• How parents can set digital boundaries without turning into full-time detectives

• Why safety needs to be the standard — like seatbelts — not an optional add-on

Connect with Mashood / Gigabit IQ:
Website: gigabitiq.com
Learn about FamilyGuard+: Gigabit IQ FamilyGuard+