Why do some traditions feel like a warm hug, while others leave you questioning everything? In this episode, I sit down with my friend Shivani Bafna, content creator and new mom, who openly shares the reality of motherhood online. We talk about pregnancy, postpartum recovery and the Indian traditions passed down through generations. She shares which ones helped her, which advice she chose to accept or ignore, and how she kept her peace with parents, in-laws and the internet all weighing in. Motherhood doesn't have to mean choosing between honouring your culture and doing what feels right for you. We talk about: Her real emotions when she found out she was pregnant, and the pressure South Asian women feel to act excited about motherhood Never seeing herself as "maternal," and the fear of losing her identity How our own mothers shape what we believe motherhood should look like Handling unsolicited advice, and why she asked her family questions instead of handing them rules The no-visitors debate, and why she chose her mental health Why every parenting decision has a trade-off, and "call me a bad mom" Three generations, three laddu recipes, and how she picked one without offending anyone The 40-day postpartum diet: saffron milk, fenugreek water and nourishing food for recovery Why every woman struggles with postpartum, and why motherhood doesn't have to be binary If you've ever felt torn between the traditions you grew up with and the mother you want to be, this conversation will make you feel a lot less alone. Subscribe and turn on notifications so you don't miss the next one; it genuinely helps me bring on more incredible guests. Follow Shivani Bafna: @shivani_bafna https://www.instagram.com/shivani_bafna AD: In England, we're using water faster than nature can replace it, and in Wales, wetter winters and drier summers are putting pressure on the water supply. We often use more than we realise, but we don't need massive lifestyle changes to change these stats. Everyday ways to save water: Cut your shower by two minutes to save 28L Use a washing up bowl instead of a running tap to save 10L per minute Fix a leaky loo to save up to 400L a day Use eco-mode on appliances to save 10L per wash Search "Let's Save Water" or visit letssavewater.com to see what small changes you could make, and maybe have a chat with your friends and family about this too. #AMillennialMind #Postpartum #SouthAsianMotherhood Chapters 00:00 Intro: why old motherhood traditions are only now making sense 02:47 Welcome, Shivani Bafna 03:53 Who was Shivani before the public eye? 04:28 Growing up Indian in the Midwest 08:03 "I was never maternal" 11:02 How our mothers shape our idea of motherhood 16:17 Her real emotions when she found out she was pregnant 19:37 When your parents disagree with your pregnancy choices 23:31 Navigating unsolicited advice as a first-time mom 28:37 Why family support is give and take 30:24 The problem with fear-based motherhood content 33:15 AD: Let's Save Water 34:05 Living under one roof with the whole family 34:47 The no-visitors rule: does she regret it? 38:52 Every parenting decision has a trade-off 39:46 The no-kissing rule 40:57 How to set boundaries with parents and in-laws 42:05 Have these conversations before the baby arrives 44:18 Three generations, three laddu recipes 46:49 Treating your family like key stakeholders 47:33 When everyone in the family disagrees 49:40 Why it's okay to change your mind as a parent 53:19 The 40-day postpartum diet 56:34 Collective care in South Asian culture 58:59 The truth about postpartum 1:01:05 Adapting traditions to work for you 1:02:26 Motherhood doesn't have to be binary 1:03:38 Final thoughts 🔔 Subscribe for more discussions on mental health, personal growth, and healing! / @shivanipaupodcast ✨ Connect with Millennial Mind ✨ Podcast Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/amillennialmind Shivani Pau Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/shivani.pau Subscribe on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/shivanipaupodcast Performance Planner: https://my-performance-planner.myshopify.com/ Let Me Change Your Mind 🧠 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
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