Have an episode suggestion? Text us!

A listener posted a question in our free TWFO Facebook community that I’ve heard a hundred times in recovery spaces: “You have to separate the person from the addiction. That wasn’t them.” And I get why people love that line. It reduces shame, makes forgiveness feel possible, and gives families hope.

But for a lot of spouses and partners, something about it doesn’t sit right… because they’ve seen the “good version” and the “destructive version” show up in the same human body, sometimes in the same day. So in this episode, I unpack the pros and cons of “separating the person from the addiction,” and why I think the truth is more nuanced, more uncomfortable, and more useful.

We talk about influence vs choice, why guilt still exists if “it wasn’t you,” how this narrative can accidentally silence the pain of the people who were harmed, and why sobriety alone is not the finish line. I’m not here to attack anyone’s path or shame anybody who’s used this framework to move forward. I’m here to hold compassion and truth at the same time, and offer a model of recovery that’s built on agency, humility, and real repair.

If you’re in recovery, this is a gut-check. If you’re a spouse or partner, this will validate why that phrase can feel like a mindf**k, and what a healthier, more honest version of healing can look like.

If you'd like to read the essay from the episode, you can find it here on our website.

Find video clips and full length video from this episode on YouTube and our other social media pages!

On the web:
www.twfo.com

Support the Show:
Buy Us a Coffee!

Online Program:
www.reclaiming-you.com

Soberlink Device:
www.soberlink.com/wheels

Check out our blog:
https://twfo.com/blog

Follow us on TikTok:
https://tiktok.com/@twfo_couple

Follow us on Instagram:
https://instagram.com/twfo_couple/

Follow us on Facebook:
https://www.facebook.com/TWFOCouple

Follow us on YouTube:
https://www.youtube.com/@twfo_couple

Find Taylor Counseling Group:
https://taylorcounselinggroup.com/

Donate to Counseling for the Future Foundation:
Donate Here

Have an episode suggestion? Text us!

Some mornings feel like a personal attack. You are late. You are out of coffee. The house is a mess. Your kid’s shirt is dirty. Your nervous system is already fried and suddenly it feels like the whole day is ruined.

In this Paige’s Perspective, Paige reminds you that one bad moment is not a bad day.

She explains why our nervous systems treat small chaos like danger, how survival mode makes everything feel heavier than it actually is, and why acting like everything is fine is not denial. It is correcting the alarm.

From chaotic mornings and coffee shortages to ice storms and packed grocery stores, this episode is a grounding reminder that most of what we panic over is inconvenient, not dangerous. You are safe. You are capable. And you can choose again at any moment.

You are not your worst moment.
You are not your hardest day.
You get to restart anytime.

Find video clips and full length video from this episode on YouTube and our other social media pages!

On the web:
www.twfo.com

Support the Show:
Buy Us a Coffee!

Online Program:
www.reclaiming-you.com

Soberlink Device:
www.soberlink.com/wheels

Check out our blog:
https://twfo.com/blog

Follow us on TikTok:
https://tiktok.com/@twfo_couple

Follow us on Instagram:
https://instagram.com/twfo_couple/

Follow us on Facebook:
https://www.facebook.com/TWFOCouple

Follow us on YouTube:
https://www.youtube.com/@twfo_couple

Find Taylor Counseling Group:
https://taylorcounselinggroup.com/

Donate to Counseling for the Future Foundation:
Donate Here

Have an episode suggestion? Text us!

Your kids are watching you. Not in a cute way. In a blueprint way.

In this episode, we talk about the moment that punched Matt in the gut: watching our son at practice miss a shot, make a shot, and immediately scan the room for Dad’s face. Like, “How should I feel about this?” That was the reminder we all need. We are the emotional thermostat in the room.

We get into what kids pick up from us way earlier than people think, how our phones and work habits quietly teach them “you’re competing with a screen,” and how our emotional reactions become their future coping skills. We also talk about relationship dynamics as parenting, because how you treat their other parent is one of the loudest lessons they’ll ever learn.

And for anyone living in instability, addiction, or chronic conflict, we say the quiet part out loud. Kids become collateral damage when adults refuse to change. Sometimes the bravest, most loving move is not “staying together.” It is creating safety and stability, even if that means big decisions.

This one stabs a little. But it’s necessary. And the good news is, patterns can change starting now.

If you want support learning how to regulate, set boundaries, and show up stronger for yourself and your kids, check out Reclaiming You at reclaiming-you.com.

Find video clips and full length video from this episode on YouTube and our other social media pages!

On the web:
www.twfo.com

Support the Show:
Buy Us a Coffee!

Online Program:
www.reclaiming-you.com

Soberlink Device:
www.soberlink.com/wheels

Check out our blog:
https://twfo.com/blog

Follow us on TikTok:
https://tiktok.com/@twfo_couple

Follow us on Instagram:
https://instagram.com/twfo_couple/

Follow us on Facebook:
https://www.facebook.com/TWFOCouple

Follow us on YouTube:
https://www.youtube.com/@twfo_couple

Find Taylor Counseling Group:
https://taylorcounselinggroup.com/

Donate to Counseling for the Future Foundation:
Donate Here