Send Me A Message

Host: Kristen Lena
Duration: 32 minutes
Season 4: Midlife Mind-Fuckery Edition


"This season is dedicated to the woman who swallows more conversations than she delivers — the midlife woman who goes silent or nuclear with nothing in between."

In this episode, I introduce the theme of the season: learning to tell the truth without blowing up your life. I share my personal origin story — from my parents' divorce when I was nine, to 23 years of estrangement from my dad, to the breakthrough conversation that changed everything. I also break down my SODA framework (the four types of midlife conflict avoiders), I share the three currencies we pay for silence in, and dare you to count every time you say "I'm fine" this week.

Powerful Quotes

"You made it to midlife, Bitch. Own it. Own all of the words coming out of your mouth, and own all of the things that you've never said up until now. Because there's no other way out."
— Kristen Lena

Timestamps

[0:00] Welcome
[1:08] Who This Season Is For
[6:12] Tell the Truth Without Blowing Up Your Life
[8:06] The Three Currencies of Silence
[9:43] Midlife Divorce Stats
[11:25] People Pleasing Is Not Kind
[12:54] What Led Me Here
[18:32] The Breakthrough Conversation
[21:06] The SODA Framework: Four Types of Conflict Avoiders
[24:57] My free guide: Say This Not That Workbook
[27:56] Your Challenge for the Week: Count Your "I'm Fine's"
[32:20] Closing + Special Offer for 1st 10 Women

Highlights

"Every swallowed sentence gets paid for later in resentment, an explosion, or an exit."
"36% of people divorcing are 50 or older. Women initiate 69% of those!"
"People pleasing is not kind because it's not the truth."
"The peace isn't meant to be kept, honey."


Resources & Links

>> Free Guidebook: Say This Not That
>> Remember, the first 10 women to DM me your 7-day "I'm fine" tally get my video course upgrade for FREE ($22 value)
>> Find me on Instagram & Facebook
>> Watch this episode on YouTube

Support the show

You can find more content on my website for real talk, free trainings & other resources to help you fully embrace your SACRED AS FUCK full self.

Kristen

Send Me A Message

Divorce, Identity Loss, and the Clarity That Came After Rage

Watch this episode on YouTube:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FL3AkExW1dE

In this episode, I dive deep into my kitchen floor meltdown: full-throttle, throat-burning, tears-streaming FUCK-YOU's directed right at God. What happened on the other side of that breakdown was the most unexpected peace of my life and the realization that cracked everything open.

The hardest part of the last 3 years, wasn't the marriage or the career that I ended, it was the identities that I had to let go of. I talk with brutal honesty about the grief of letting go and my stubborn, enduring resistance to it.

This episode has all of it ... why I disappeared, what the coaching industry's collapse looked like from the inside, what full-time single parenting actually costs, and what happens when you stop fighting what is.

Come find me on Facebook or Instagram and tell me what you're going through. I want to know. I'm not here to perform, I'm here because there are things that need to be said and I'm the one to say them.

00:00 Anniversary Reflections
01:02 Divorce Epiphany Setup
03:01 Why I Quit Coaching
04:03 Divorce Survival Mode
05:18 Tools That Explained Me
11:20 Cracks In Coaching Industry
12:04 Marketing For Other Coaches
15:07 Identity Loss And Aging
18:06 Single Mom Anger
19:55 Screaming At God
23:03 I Got What I Asked For
28:51 Letting Go Takes Time
31:56 Your Role In The Dynamic
32:52 Why Ive Been Quiet
34:48 Podcast Invitation
35:34 Closing Thanks

Support the show

You can find more content here on my website for real talk, free trainings & others resources to help you fully embrace your SACRED AS FUCK full self.

Kristen

Send Me A Message

Why I’m Podcasting Again:
Divorce, Menopause, and Rebuilding in Midlife

Watch this episode on YouTube:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3PGfhBrdNbw

In this episode, I introduce a new season of The Sacred AF Podcast and share why I'm creating this around the struggles that midlife women face.

It's been three years since stepping back from my online coaching business and I've been healing the pain that divorce brought for me and my children.

The last few years has been an intense period of survival (and surrender) from ending a marriage, losing a home, closing my business, becoming a full-time solo parent, experiencing financial instability, and going through menopause.

I can honestly say I have processed a range of emotions from fear and anger to grief and sadness and I want to speak candidly about the “messy” parts of midlife.

Things like loss of identity (wife, business owner, youth, fitness), my inevitable surrender to less-than-ideal circumstances, and to share the profound lessons I've learned through this process.

This season of The Sacred AD Podcast is for midlife women facing similar challenges. My intention is to offer comfort, empowerment, resilience, and hope, while sharing how I processed the past so I (and maybe you) can create a new future.

00:00 Why Podcasting Matters

01:53 Who I Am Now

02:15 Three Years of Upheaval

05:26 Single Mom Survival

06:26 Messy Truth and Grief

09:10 Identity Loss and Body Changes

11:08 Why This Podcast Now

13:39 Redefining Hope and Happiness

15:23 Intention for Midlife Women

17:46 Closing Thoughts and Next Steps

Support the show

You can find more content here on my website for real talk, free trainings & others resources to help you fully embrace your SACRED AS FUCK full self.

Kristen

Send Me A Message

My first guest episode in a while and it's with my new AMAZING friend Samantha Sanford (I LOVE HER). She's been in the online business world as an OBM for some very successful coaches and got tired being in the background when she knew she had so much to contribute herself.

Samantha decided to take on SHAME by creating a one-month long daily public monologue with shame. For every day of August 2025, she bravely recorded audios of herself confronting the things she was holding shame around. Then worked through allowing the shame to be there, inquiring what it was here to teach her and she has come full circle into her own power.

I'm so inspired by Samantha's discovery doing the Shame Monologues that I reveal something at the end of this episode that shocked even me! Here's what we dove into on this episode...

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We explored how feeling shame, especially in women, is often avoided and how reconnecting with oneself can lead to greater power and intuition. Samantha shared her journey of discovering her own intuition and passion for redefining shame as a hidden teacher for unconditional self-love.

One of Samantha's biggest discoveries happened when she learned the importance of healing in the moment rather than viewing it as a long-term process. We discussed the importance of self-love and personal connection as a path to transforming the world, emphasizing that man-made issues like war and trafficking stem from people being disconnected from themselves.

She shared her decision to take bold steps in her career, moving from being a stay-at-home mom to building her own brand and mission all of which came out of her discovery of her relationship with long-held and hidden shame. Through her brand REBEL MATRIARCH and her personal work with shame, she's ready to be a catalyst for other women to work through shame.

This is just the beginning of a divine relationship, with both of us continuing to do this work together for the greater good. Listen in to this one and let us know if you're ready to tackle shame yourself.

You can find Samantha Sanford right here.

Support the show

You can find more content here on my website for real talk, free trainings & others resources to help you fully embrace your SACRED AS FUCK full self.

Kristen

Send Me A Message

This one’s personal, raw and real as fuck and it might be better WATCHED than listened to: https://youtu.be/EKoJdqiwxBA

In this episode, I crack myself all the way open (ugly cries and snotty nose) and tell the truth about what it’s actually like to untangle yourself from toxic conditioning — religious, societal, relational — of the patriarchy and reclaim the parts of yourself you were told to hide, especially your sexuality, your power and your voice.

I talk about growing up feeling unsafe and unprotected, and how the absence of strong male figures shaped the hyper-masculine armor I wore for decades. I share stories I’ve never said out loud before — including early sexual traumas, painful memories from adolescence, and the root of the deep masculine energy that made me feel safe… until it didn’t anymore.

This isn’t just about pain — it’s about the power I am reclaiming while going through the pain.

It’s about finding emotional safety inside a relationship (so delicious) and within myself for the first time as a grown woman.

It’s about healing through trust, pleasure, expression and telling the whole damn truth — even if it offends a lotta people.

I talk about the collapse of my marriage, exploring ethical non-monogamy, and navigating desire as a conscious, powerful woman. I unpack how religion taught me to feel shame about my body and my sexuality — and how I'm burning that shame to the ground.

This episode is for any woman who’s ever felt silenced, scared, shamed, or spiritually suffocated.

It’s for the rebels, the seekers, the rule-breakers, and the ones who know their pussy power is a sacred portal to purpose and prosperity.

And yes — some people won’t like it.

I lost followers and it "stung" ... but not really. Because if I'm pretending to be someone just to keep you around, then I can't blame you for leaving when I actually show you who I am. Right?

We all know I’m not here to play nice just to make others comfortable.

I’m here to start a f*cking rebellion.

You comin'?

Support the show

You can find more content here on my website for real talk, free trainings & others resources to help you fully embrace your SACRED AS FUCK full self.

Kristen

Send Me A Message

The "funny" thing about life is you don't get the lessons until AFTER you do the thing.

In this episode, I decide to take the mic to talk to ALL THE WOMEN out there, in their late 20's or early 30's who are PLANNING their life.

You know what I mean... assessing your partner (or looking for one) for fatherhood worthiness, provider abilities, alignment of future family goals - you know, the clock is ticking!

Because women have REAL, BIOLOGICAL hindrances, we MUST be discerning when it comes to partnerships during this time in our lives. We are LITERALLY against the clock and who we choose to procreate with is a massive decision.

I share my story as it relates to my marriage/babies journey and how I realized (just a few weeks ago) that I actually INTENDED to be a single parent because of this one thing.

I also cover ...

😱 The HUGE realization about my ex which led me to FULL acceptance & peace
🤦🏼‍♀️ The shitty societal and biological pressures we face around motherhood
👉🏻 How my feminist viewpoints on life took a DRAMATIC twist once I had a baby
🔒 The absolute IMPERATIVE questions to ask yourself (and your partner) BEFORE you have kids

I wish, before I got married and had kids, I knew to ask these questions of myself. Maybe my marriage would have turned out differently. But for any woman approaching that BIOLOGICAL CLOCK DEADLINE, please listen, watch and learn from my mistakes.

Wishing you all the best!

Support the show

You can find more content here on my website for real talk, free trainings & others resources to help you fully embrace your SACRED AS FUCK full self.

Kristen

Send Me A Message

I decided to pick up my mic and discuss an interaction I had with my daughter that had me questioning and wondering what it would be like ... to be a boy.

Which caused my daughter to ask if I wanted to transition. LOL!

And then a couple of days later, I saw a post by someone I follow on FB about the difference in confidence and boldness between men and women.

Watch the episode on YouTube right here (I pull up the post by Kylie and share it with you): https://youtu.be/lxwV73DkxCA

Here is Kylie's post as well: https://www.facebook.com/share/p/166XP7G4FB/

Support the show

You can find more content here on my website for real talk, free trainings & others resources to help you fully embrace your SACRED AS FUCK full self.

Kristen

Send Me A Message

This just in 😱 .... HUSTLE IS KILLING WOMEN! (jk I'm being a bit dramatic)

But, true Queens now that to slow DOWN is to speed UP.

Wanna watch instead of just listen, go here: https://youtu.be/7YIsXjLM97g?si=pZVrOIcgFTdrU4rz

On this episode, I invite listeners to really look at their relationship with work, productivity and success. And I ask them to explore the importance of rest, self-acceptance, and creating boundaries in order to reclaim our time and mental health.

• Stress and overwhelm as universal American expectations
• The mental load of doing it all and its impact on well-being
• Questioning productivity and its association with women's self-worth
• The necessity of setting boundaries and saying no to others and yes to you
• Embracing rest as a new form of success
• The importance of community support in personal journeys
• Normalizing struggle to encourage open discussion

Redefining success without burning out is possible, and we talk about how to achieve it. Reflecting on traditional notions of success, we highlight the importance of rest and self-care, sharing personal stories of intentionally slowing down. Prioritizing happiness over relentless productivity, we look at the new and transformative mindset of how the younger generations are not willing to work themselves to death. Join us as we honor struggles and find balance, advocating for living authentically and finding joy in the present moment.

Send this to a woman that you think is addicted to hustle culture and you want her to stop.

Support the show

You can find more content on my website for real talk, free trainings & other resources to help you fully embrace your SACRED AS FUCK full self.

Kristen