Episodi

  • Ep. 142 Let's Be Alone Together
    May 22 2024

    Spaceabichuelos! I don't know how to spell that and it doesn't even matter. I just called you spacebeans, which is one of many insight you will gain listening to today's episode. Today, we're talking about being alone with your partner. We'll give you some hot tips and cool riffs, just like Ross Cowan in high school. Top-hat wearin' Ross.

    We talk about the 1/1/1 and the 7/7/7 ratio of spending time with your spouse. Don't know what those are? Don't worry my little beans--we'll tell you. So grab your spouse, both metaphorically and literally, and listen in.

    Keywords
    vacations, quality time, one-one-one rule, seven-seven-seven rule, fashion trends, dates, relationships, reconnect, responsibilities, distractions, intentional, mindful

    Takeaways

    • Taking vacations as a couple is important for maintaining a strong relationship
    • The one-one-one rule (one date per week, one day together per month, one vacation per year) is a helpful guideline for spending quality time together
    • Setting aside time for each other away from responsibilities and distractions is important
    • Vacations and dates can help couples reconnect and remember why they love each other
    • Transitioning into vacation mode can be challenging, but being intentional and mindful can help
    • Incorporating elements of vacation and date mindset into regular routines can keep the relationship strong

    Sound Bites

    • "Welcome space beans"
    • "Who eats this for breakfast?"
    • "The untouched didn't happen"
    • "Before we get into this massively transformational."
    • "Almost everybody I've asked, I can't think of anybody who hasn't answered me this way."
    • "There's a mistake in believing if you do these things, your relationship will be repaired."

    Chapters
    00:00
    Nostalgia for 90s Fashion Trends and Music

    02:45
    Exploring Regional Accents and Concert Experiences

    08:44
    The Fascination with Texas Accents

    13:37
    Introduction to the importance of vacations

    22:09
    Rules and guidelines for planning vacations

    27:34
    The transformative nature of vacations

    29:42
    Incorporating vacation elements into everyday life

    31:59
    The Importance of Making Time for Vacations and Dates

    32:47
    Transitioning into Vacation Mode: The Need for Intentional Effort

    33:51
    Exploring New Places and Activities Together

    44:29
    The Role of Planning and Responsibility in a Relationship

    47:07
    Trying New Things to Keep the Spark Alive

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    51 min
  • Ep. 141 The Value of Logic...like you didn't know already.
    May 15 2024

    Calm down spacemen. Today, Matt, Mike, and Rob rationally delve into the wide world of logic. I know what you're thinking, "Hey Rob, didn't guys do a previous episode on the necessity of emotions over logic?" Yes, you have a point there. But what sort of men of space would we be if we could not confidently state, "We were wrong!" And by 'wrong' we mean, we have more to say on the subject that will clarify things. Spoiler alert, it involves balancing logic and emotion. We are nothing if not balanced.

    Keywords
    logic, emotion, relationships, perception, couples therapy, communication, understanding, problem-solving, relationships, societal expectations, validation, trust

    Takeaways

    • Different people interpret and perceive emotions differently, and context plays a significant role.
    • Logic and emotion both have a place in relationships, and it's important to find a balance.
    • In couples therapy, it is common to ask men to connect with their emotions and women to engage their logical thinking.
    • Balancing logic and emotion is crucial in relationships, as both perspectives are valuable and necessary.
    • Effective communication involves understanding and respecting each other's ways of thinking and processing information.
    • Both partners should be able to move between the logical and emotional realms
    • Therapists play a role in helping clients navigate these dynamics
    • Validating emotions while encouraging logical thinking is important
    • Trust and recognizing each other's capacities are key to successful conversations

    Sound Bites

    • "This podcast is the raddest of them all"
    • "Your salad's not really cutting it"
    • "I liked it, actually"
    • "Women, Logic Up."
    • "Get out of my dreams, get into my car."
    • "I know it feels like I'm being dismissive, but right now you're getting so flooded."
    • "Our society has decided logic is more better"
    • "At some point we have to learn how to separate what we're hearing emotionally and applying some amount of logic to it"
    • "How often do we ask women what they think?"


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    55 min
  • Ep. 140 Knowing When to Stay Silent
    May 8 2024

    Bruhs, let's play the quiet game. You start, cause I have a lot to say. But fair warning, the audio of what I say will be horrible today. I don't know why. It's unknowable.

    On today's episode, Matt, Mike, and Rob explore the importance of silence in various situations. We also touch on the moments in life where it is best to stay silent, according to psychology. And, AND, we extend a call to (in)action. Try it out, you'll thank us.

    Keywords

    silence, teaching, teenagers, psychology, moments in life, staying silent, support, empathy, listening

    Takeaways

    • Silence can be an effective teaching tool, especially with teenagers.
    • There are moments in life where it is best to stay silent, according to psychology.
    • Silence allows others to be the expert and can boost their confidence.
    • Listening and being present in the moment can be powerful forms of support and empathy.

    Sound Bites

    • "That was my cue to ask the question again. So I would, and I usually ask it in a more playful joking way."
    • "Silent but violent."
    • "They just needed to be together."

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    51 min
  • Ep. 139 The Constant Feeling of Being in Trouble
    May 1 2024

    I'm telling that you did that. You're gonna be in SO MUCH trouble. It's okay spacemen, you can admit it. There's no Alphas in the room with you who will mock you. You're in a safe space. We all have fears of upsetting someone. In fact, even though most people will say they don't care about what people think, pretty much EVERYONE does. So, we tackle that today on the show.

    Matt, Mike, and Rob explore the feeling of constantly being in trouble or disappointing others, both in relationships and in other areas of life. We talk about how men often express this sentiment and the sources of this feeling, such as societal expectations, authority figures, and fear of disappointing others. And we talk about the common experience of men feeling like they are always in trouble and the impact it can have on their well-being. Spoiler alert, we talk about the importance of having open and honest conversations, understanding and owning one's emotions, and embracing the humanity of the human experience.

    Keywords
    feeling in trouble, disappointing others, relationships, societal expectations, authority figures, anxiety, stress, fear of disappointing, being in trouble, societal expectations, childhood experiences, open and honest conversations, owning emotions, humanity

    Takeaways

    • Many men express the feeling of constantly being in trouble or disappointing others. This feeling can arise in relationships, work, and other areas of life.
    • Societal expectations and the fear of disappointing authority figures contribute to this feeling.
    • Anxiety and stress often perpetuate the belief that one is always in trouble. The fear of disappointing others is often rooted in societal expectations and childhood experiences.
    • Having open and honest conversations can help address and overcome the fear of disappointing others.
    • Understanding and owning one's emotions is crucial in navigating relationships and communication.
    • Embracing the humanity of the human experience allows for more authentic and meaningful connections.

    Sound Bites

    • "Do you always feel like you're in trouble? Because I feel that all the time."
    • "I'm doing something wrong and some overarching authority figure is gonna be mad at me and I'm in trouble."
    • "I feel like I am behind, I'm failing somewhere, someone's gonna be disappointed."
    • "I don't always get the men telling me this is what I felt. I have to share. This is what I've felt."
    • "Where did this come from for me? Because we didn't necessarily grow up in a home where..."
    • "I just default in that realm, I defaulted over into he's my dad. I'm the kid who doesn't know anything."

    Chapters

    00:00
    The Constant Feeling of Being in Trouble

    18:52
    Defaulting to Partners as Authority Figures

    35:39
    Breaking Free from Societal Expectations

    44:40
    Understanding and Owning Your Emotions

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    57 min
  • Ep. 138 What Women Want...According to the Internet
    Apr 24 2024

    Don't worry spacemen. We, the Admirals of the Spaceiverse, have figured out what women want. We scoured the internet and found all the articles (3 in total) that reveal the desires and needs of women. The key takeaway? You should already know.

    Turns out, the internet is full of idiots. Luckily, we're here to help you understand what women actually want. But, you might have to ask your partner/spouse.

    Keywords

    what women want, qualities in a man, emotional availability, connectedness, strong listener, confidence, vulnerability, women, men, understanding, themes, female aggression, body image, emotional experiences, mental load, communication, understanding, conversation, articles, insights, needs, desires, questions, listening, connection, activities

    Takeaways

    • Women look for emotional availability and connectedness in a man.
    • Being a strong listener is an important quality.
    • Confidence is attractive to women.
    • Vulnerability is valued by women.
    • These qualities may vary from person to person. Understanding women's thought processes and experiences is important in relationships.
    • Female aggression can be subtle and harder to detect.
    • Body image, emotional experiences, and mental load are key themes in women's desires for understanding.
    • Some items on the list are amusing and may not resonate with everyone.
    • Communication and empathy are crucial for building strong relationships. Have open and honest conversations with your partner to understand their needs and desires
    • Ask questions and actively listen to deepen the connection
    • Avoid making assumptions and seek genuine understanding
    • Engage in activities that facilitate quick connections with other men
    • Prioritize genuine communication over relying solely on articles

    Sound Bites

    • "Emo avail, which sounds like a sweet emo band."
    • "It's the only one with a cookie crunch."
    • "They want vulnerability."
    • "Issues relating to body, emotional experiences, and mental load."
    • "Female aggression is a bit more subtle at times."
    • "Real men drive stick shift."
    • "You should know all this and more"
    • "We've been taught to play hard to get forever"

    Chapters

    00:00
    Introduction and Banter

    08:02
    Overview of Articles and Topics

    14:17
    How Matt and Mike Scored

    27:03
    Superficial Desires and Pursuit

    33:20
    The Value of Open and Honest Conversations

    43:47
    Activities that Foster Quick Connections Among Men

    50:07
    Prioritizing Genuine Communication over Articles

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    47 min
  • Ep. 137 Neural Nostalgia--Take Me Back to the 90's
    Apr 17 2024

    What's up home skillets? That's what the internet tells me we said in the 90s. I don't think I did, but I also thought I was cool and probably wasn't. Remember when we said awesome-sauce? Or Awesome to the possum? Or the bomb.com? Gross. We were gross. But we were so cool too, right?

    On today's episode, Mike and Rob get over missing Matt by talking about neural nostalgia and connecting with our true cool 90's selves. We talk about how listening to music from our youth taps into specific parts of our brains and connects us to our sense of self. So listen in and then crank up the Fastball, or Backstreet Boys, or Korn. Whatever you think you grew out of. You didn't. That you is still in there and dying to get out.

    Keywords

    nostalgia, 90s, humor, therapy, music, identity, trends, generations, science, empathy, nostalgia, reconnecting with joy, music, hobbies, self-care

    Takeaways

    • Nostalgia for the 90s can evoke positive emotions and a sense of identity.
    • Music has the power to influence mood and shape personal identity.
    • Trends and generations repeat themselves, with each generation believing they have reached the peak.
    • Reconnecting with the things that bring you joy and make you feel like yourself is important for your well-being.
    • Nostalgia can have a powerful impact on your mood and sense of identity.
    • Embrace your interests and hobbies, even if they may seem childish or out of style.
    • Balancing responsibilities with personal passions is a challenge, but finding time for self-care is crucial.
    • Don't be afraid to be yourself and pursue the things that make you happy, regardless of what others may think.

    Sound Bites

    • "Solid as Iraq."
    • "Drive through records. They were so cool in the early 2000s, the early aughts."
    • "I'm amazing. So you could hear that because she's a little harder hearing. So it's like, I needed you to hear that part."
    • "I'm gonna party like it's 1999, which I do wanna remind everyone who is alive for the transition from 1999 to 2000, just how disappointing that was."

    Chapters

    00:00
    Nostalgia for the 90s

    08:36
    The Persistence of Streaming

    14:43
    Questioning Assumptions

    31:52
    Cutting Off Parts of Ourselves to Fit Societal Expectations

    41:36
    Embracing Your Interests and Hobbies

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    57 min
  • Ep. 136 You’re Making Your Kids Anxious
    Apr 10 2024

    SPACEMEN!!!! Did you know you’re screwing your kids up? You’re not. But what if you are? Well today, we’ll address that topic. We talk about clip from Dr. Becky Kennedy, a clinical psychologist known as the millennial parenting whisperer. We’ll talk about how focusing on making kids happy can actually make them fearful and less tolerant of other emotions. When parents try to rescue their kids from distress, they send the message that certain emotions are bad and should be avoided. This can lead to anxiety in adulthood. It is important to develop resilience in kids and allow them to experience a range of emotions. Society's emphasis on happiness and the avoidance of pain can be detrimental to emotional development. We even give you an activity to do at home to help develop your tolerance for emotional discomfort.

    Keywords
    Dr. Becky Kennedy, parenting, happiness, emotions, resilience, anxiety, distress, avoidance, societal pressure, pain, discomfort, emotions, emotional regulation, tolerance, resilience, validation, comparison, mindfulness, ice cube exercise

    Takeaways

    • Avoiding distressful emotions can lead to anxiety in adulthood.
    • It is important to allow kids to experience a range of emotions and not rescue them from distress.
    • Society's emphasis on happiness and the avoidance of pain can hinder emotional development. Allowing children to experience and tolerate pain and discomfort is important for their emotional development and resilience.
    • Validating children's emotions and avoiding comparisons or false reassurances is more helpful in supporting their emotional well-being.
    • Emotional regulation involves regulating the influence of emotions on behavior and being intentional about how much influence emotions have in different situations.
    • The ice cube exercise can be a helpful mindfulness practice to build resilience and learn to tolerate discomfort.
    • Acknowledging and labeling emotions is important, but it is not always necessary to fully experience them.

    Sound Bites

    • "Listening to music from your high school years can boost your mood"
    • "Homestar Runner, Space Ghost Coast to Coast, and Clone High are nostalgic favorites"
    • "Internet issues and frozen screens can be frustrating"
    • "If you have any poo, fling it now."
    • "Anxiety actually isn't a feeling, it's the experience of wanting to run away from a feeling."
    • "Our job is not to make our kid happy."
    • "I think we have this idea that now you must go feel it. It's like, do I, or can I just say, no, it's there. I know it's there."
    • "You're never going to find happiness through comparison."
    • "The purpose of pain is to be resilient because life involves suffering and adversity."

    Chapters

    00:00
    Boost Your Mood with Music Nostalgia

    14:53
    Introducing Dr. Becky Kennedy, the Millennial Parenting Whisperer

    15:12
    The Role of Parents: Developing Resilience in Kids

    26:19
    Allowing Kids to Experience a Range of Emotions

    30:04
    Societal Pressure and Emotional Development

    38:34
    Allowing Children to Experience and Tolerate Pain

    40:41
    Validating Children's Emotions and Avoiding Comparisons

    46:26
    Emotional Regulation: Regulating the Influence of Emotions on Behavior

    56:25
    The Ice Cube Exercise: Building Resilience and Tolerating Discomfort

    01:03:48
    Acknowledging and Labeling Emotions without Fully Experiencing Them

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    55 min
  • Ep. 135 What's a Guy To Do? Speak Up For Yourself
    Apr 3 2024

    This is ground control to spacemen. Come in spacemen. And welcome to another exciting installment of The Manspace Podcast. On today's episode, AI is pretty sure we just talked about "understanding the drive behind emphasis." Come on AI. If you want to be my supreme overlord, you're gonna have to up your game a little.

    In actuality, in this episode, Matt shares a story about a dude making complaint at a Thai restaurant. Then Matt, Mike, and Rob explore what happened and how this complaint seemed to carry so much weight in this guys relationship. We talk about a bunch of stuff, including: the importance of expressing preferences and the impact of not speaking up for oneself, the common experience of feeling obligated to address issues, the role of a husband and the pressure to fix problems in a relationship, and the conversation concludes by highlighting the significance of understanding the drive behind emphasis and cultivating effective communication and preferences in relationships. So we do talk about the drive behind emphasis, but it's not like it's ALL we talk about. Sheesh AI. Calm down.

    Takeaways

    • It is important to speak up for oneself and express preferences in relationships.
    • Feeling obligated to address issues can create tension and resentment in relationships.
    • Open communication and understanding are key to resolving conflicts. A good husband is someone who can assert their preferences and communicate their needs in a relationship.
    • Understanding the drive behind emphasis and passion in communication can lead to better understanding and collaboration.
    • It is important to find a balance between deferring to your partner's preferences and asserting your own.
    • Stating preferences and communicating needs can help avoid resentment and build healthier relationship dynamics.

    Chapters

    00:00
    Introduction

    03:00
    The dynamics of speaking up in relationships

    14:54
    The importance of expressing preferences in relationships

    22:32
    The common experience of feeling obligated to address issues

    23:14
    The Role of a Husband

    24:17
    The Pressure to Fix Problems

    25:22
    Feminine and Masculine Energy

    26:37
    Taking Care of Relationship Dynamics

    28:28
    The Weight of Passion

    29:27
    Emphasis vs. Passion

    30:06
    Speaking Up with Emphasis

    31:09
    Understanding the Drive Behind Emphasis

    36:28
    Cultivating Communication and Preferences

    37:36
    Finding Balance in Relationship Dynamics

    38:36
    Understanding the Drive Behind Emphasis

    51:24
    Closing Remarks

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    52 min