Supporting your college student looks different once midterm grades are in and the semester heads into its home stretch.

Deonne Yeager is Director of Parent and Family Programs at the University of South Carolina, with 26 years in higher education. She sees the same thing every fall. Students who always made straight A's get their first big grade back, and panic sets in. Some college classes only have two or three graded assignments, so one exam carries a lot of weight.

We talked with Deonne about how parents can help from a distance, why so many students avoid their professors, and what happens when the trip home for Thanksgiving isn't realistic.

Then comes winter break. Your student has had months of freedom, picked up new opinions, and may not want the same house rules they had senior year. Deonne's advice for that first long break applies to both sides. Parents change too, and most of us don't realize it.

We share some of our own experience as well: Rick's first-semester calculus quiz, our son's law school classes that come down to one final, and the first time we had an intellectual debate with our daughter.

And if you have a high school senior opening college acceptances right now, Deonne has advice about who should be making the call.

What's in this episode:

• Why one midterm grade can rattle even high-achieving college students, and how to help them see the bigger picture
• Why the University of South Carolina schedules Family Weekend five to six weeks into the semester
• What a university parent and family office does to keep families informed
• Why students stop talking to professors, and why faculty want them to show up
• What campuses offer students who can't get home for Thanksgiving
• What to expect when your college student comes home for winter break
• When to start letting your high school senior lead the college decision

University of South Carolina Office of Parent and Family Programs https://www.sc.edu/parents/index.php

📖 Our book is here! The Loud Quiet – Love, Laughter and Life in the Empty Nest https://www.theloudquiet.com

If your student is coming home for winter break soon, come tell us how you're getting ready in our Facebook group. https://www.facebook.com/groups/theloudquiet

🎧 Find all episodes, podcast apps, and YouTube links here: https://www.theloudquiet.com

CHAPTERS

00:00 What families face after midterms

01:03 Family Weekend at the University of South Carolina

05:13 Why students struggle five weeks in

09:13 How university parent offices stay in touch

12:35 Helping your student after a bad grade

18:25 Why students avoid talking to professors

21:24 When students can't get home for Thanksgiving

23:39 Your student's first long break home

27:39 Respectful debates with your college student

30:42 Advice for parents of high school seniors

32:43 How to reach Deonne Yeager

Want to be a guest on The Loud Quiet - Empty Nest Living?

Send Rick and Clancy Denton a message on PodMatch: https://www.podmatch.com/hostdetailpreview/theloudquiethost

Disclaimer: This podcast is for informational and entertainment purposes only. The views and opinions expressed are those of the hosts and guests and should not be taken as legal, financial, or professional advice. Always consult with a qualified attorney, financial advisor, or other professional regarding your specific situation. The opinions expressed by guests are solely theirs and do not necessarily represent the views or positions of the host(s).

Impulse shopping has never been easier, and in the empty nest it can sneak up on you fast. In this true confessions episode, Clancy asks: am I addicted to shopping, or is it just a phase? A new season, a closet she's rebuilding from scratch, a TikTok feed full of cute finds, and one-tap Apple Pay all lined up to fill our porch with boxes. Nothing on its own was expensive. Together, it was a lot.

Rick owns his part too. As the one who handles our finances, he saw the spike and went with passive aggressive comments about the packages instead of a real conversation, even 26 years into our marriage. We talk about why shopping addiction gets a wink and a smile when other habits don't, what happens when you try to scroll your way out of the algorithm, and the three things we’re trying now: friction, transparency, and balance. Dining and travel are on the table too. If your empty nest spending has quietly crept up, this one's for you.

In this episode, you'll learn:

-The impulse shopping triggers that stack up in the empty nest, like a new season, a changing wardrobe, and shopping with friends, and how fast they add up.

-Why TikTok and one-tap Apple Pay make shopping almost frictionless, and how that missing pause turns "that's cute" into another box on the porch.

-The early signs your shopping has gone past need, like buying a near duplicate of something you own or borrowing a shoe shelf from your kid's old room.

-Why shopping addiction gets laughed off in a way other habits don't, and how the rush of a new outfit and a compliment keeps the cycle going.

-How conflict avoidance shows up in marriage, even after 26 years, and why a snarky comment about packages is not the same as an honest money conversation.

-Three ways to curb impulse shopping and empty nest spending: add friction, be transparent about where the money goes, and aim for balance instead of going ditch to ditch.

Prior Episode mentioned:

Empty Nesters Talk Medical Procedures...some necessary, some elective E145 https://youtu.be/W70db0uhd5k

📖 Our book is here! The Loud Quiet – Love, Laughter and Life in the Empty Nest https://www.theloudquiet.com

Has your empty nest spending crept up too? Tell us what's helping in the Facebook group. https://www.facebook.com/groups/theloudquiet

🎧 Find all episodes, podcast apps, and YouTube links here:

https://www.theloudquiet.com

CHAPTERS

00:00 Am I addicted to shopping or is it a phase?

01:21 Fall clothes and starting a closet over

03:56 Shopping from the back seat on vacation

05:00 How TikTok fuels impulse shopping

07:19 Apple Pay and frictionless spending

08:16 A cucumber and a cardigan at Walmart

10:52 When did the shopping become too much?

14:08 Why shopping addiction gets a wink and a smile

17:30 Will the algorithm let you walk away?

20:06 Rick's passive aggressive package comments

25:26 Friction, transparency and balance

31:37 Our book as a holiday gift

Want to be a guest on The Loud Quiet - Empty Nest Living? Send Rick and Clancy Denton a message on PodMatch: https://www.podmatch.com/hostdetailpreview/theloudquiethost

Disclaimer: This podcast is for informational and entertainment purposes only. The views and opinions expressed are those of the hosts and guests and should not be taken as legal, financial, or professional advice. Always consult with a qualified attorney, financial advisor, or other professional regarding your specific situation. The opinions expressed by guests are solely theirs and do not necessarily represent the views or positions of the host(s).

#EmptyNesters #EmptyNesting #EmptyNest #ImpulseShopping #ShoppingAddiction #EmotionalSpending #TikTokMadeMeBuyIt #MoneyAndMarriage #Marriage #Relationships #Lifeafterkidsleave #Newchapterinlife #Reconnectingasacouple #Relationshipafterkids #HolidayGiftIdeas #Podcast #TheLoudQuiet

Acts of kindness are the small, observant choices that take about 30 seconds and can turn someone's day around. So why do they feel so rare right now? On Clancy's morning walks, only about 60 percent of people wave or say hello back. Commutes turn into races, a friendly note on a windshield feels like a scam, and the algorithm keeps feeding us the worst of each other. If you've been wondering where all the kindness went, especially in this empty nest season, you're not imagining it.

We're Clancy and Rick Denton, empty nesters and co-authors of The Loud Quiet: Love, Laughter and Life in the Empty Nest, and in this episode we trade the stories that restored a little of our faith in people. A stranger who waved Clancy ahead in the checkout line. A fulfillment center worker who mailed back the truck keys Rick accidentally returned. A quick DM reply from a podcast host that ended with a compliment. We also get honest about how hard it is to be kind to the person you live with, especially during a sick week, and why scheduling kindness works better than waiting to feel it. Clancy reads a passage from Theo of Golden by Allen Levi, and we leave you with a real question: with World Kindness Day coming up on November 13, what could empty nesters do together to bring kindness back?

In this episode, you'll learn:

• Why acts of kindness feel so rare right now, starting with Clancy's morning walk count, where only about 60 percent of people wave or say hello back
• How the commute became the place many of us fall short on kindness, and why turning the other cheek on the road could stop most road rage moments
• Why it can be hardest to be kind to the person you live with, and what a sick week and a 5:40 a.m. alarm taught us
• How small acts of kindness start with being observant, from a stranger offering her spot in line to a warehouse worker mailing back lost truck keys
• Whether social media and the algorithm push us toward negativity, and how a 30 second DM reply proved kindness online still exists
• Why scheduling kindness works, from a family day of kindness to serving with your life group, plus the easiest daily habit: thanking your server
• What Theo of Golden by Allen Levi shows about quiet kindness, and our question for you about what empty nesters could do together

Mentioned in this episode:

Theo of Golden by Allen Levi https://link.amazon/B08aGbrkl (affiliate link)

📖 Our book is here! The Loud Quiet – Love, Laughter and Life in the Empty Nest https://www.theloudquiet.com

Got an idea for an act of kindness empty nesters could do together? Tell us in the Facebook group or leave us a voicemail on our website. https://www.facebook.com/groups/theloudquiet

🎧 Find all episodes, podcast apps, and YouTube links here:

https://www.theloudquiet.com

CHAPTERS

00:00 Where has all the kindness gone

00:46 Why only 60 percent of people wave back

02:14 Commute kindness and turning the other cheek

06:54 Being kind to the person you live with

10:28 Small acts of kindness in the checkout line

11:29 A company mails back lost truck keys

14:59 Social media, the algorithm and negativity

17:58 A DM reply that made Clancy's day

21:04 Should you schedule kindness

22:02 Why you should always thank your server

27:18 Theo of Golden by Allen Levi

29:30 What can empty nesters do together

Want to be a guest on The Loud Quiet - Empty Nest Living? Send Rick and Clancy Denton a message on PodMatch: https://www.podmatch.com/hostdetailpreview/theloudquiethost

Disclaimer: This podcast is for informational and entertainment purposes only. The views and opinions expressed are those of the hosts and guests and should not be taken as legal, financial, or professional advice. Always consult with a qualified attorney, financial advisor, or other professional regarding your specific situation. The opinions expressed by guests are solely theirs and do not necessarily represent the views or positions of the host(s).