In this deeply personal solo episode, Nole explores the complex social dilemma that arises from a simple, ubiquitous question: "Do you have kids?" Drawing inspiration from the book Hope is the First Dose by Dr. W. Lee Warren, Nole discusses the internal tug-of-war between social convenience and honoring the memory of his two sons, Asher and Paxton. He breaks down how he navigates these conversations in different circles, from the firehouse to new friendships, and offers a practical "Tactical Pause" framework for listeners on both sides of a heavy conversation.

Key Discussion Points

• The Three-Question Trap: How standard small talk (How long on the job? Where have you worked? Are you married?) often leads to a "conversational grenade" when the topic of children arises for a grieving parent.
• The Honesty Dilemma: The struggle between giving the "easy" answer (focusing only on living children) and the "honest" answer, which carries the weight of loss but honors the family’s full story.
• The Three Tiers of Connection:
  1. The Acquaintance/Stranger: Navigating interactions with people you may never see again.
  2. The Growing Friendship: Why it’s important to "stop the flow" and share the hard parts of your story early with those who will be in your life.
  3. The Professional Crew: The necessity of situational awareness and vulnerability within a high-stakes team like a fire engine company.
• Authenticity over Comfort: Nole reflects on a recent conviction to be more authentic in his beliefs and history, even if it creates a "tactical pause" or social awkwardness.

The "Tactical Pause" Framework

Nole provides advice for when you inadvertently ask a question that yields a heavy, unexpected response:

1. Take a Tactical Pause: Stop for a few beats. Recognize the weight of the information given.
2. Avoid Clichés: Phrases like "everything happens for a reason" or "they’re in a better place" are often unhelpful in the moment of disclosure.
3. Ask for Permission: Instead of asking "What happened?" directly, try: "I'm so sorry, I didn't know. Would it be alright if I asked more about that, or are you okay talking about it?"
4. Be Brave Enough to Stay: Entering the "muddy waters" of someone’s grief can be a profound act of love and validation.

Big thank you to My Epic and Facedown Records for the use of their song "Hail" in our podcast!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Dz2RZThURTU&ab_channel=FacedownRecords

Get signed up for the next trip with Hold the Line!

https://www.fireupprogram.org/hold-the-line

The Fire You Carry on YouTube.

Sign up for a class at The Fire Up Program!
https://www.fireupprogram.com/programs

The Fire Up Progam video.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I__ErPW46Ec&t=12s&ab_channel=FireUpProgram

The Fire You Carry Instagram.
https://www.instagram.com/thefireyoucarry/

Donate to The Fire Up Program.
https://www.fireupprogram.com/donate

The Fire Up Program Instagram.
https://www.instagram.com/fireup_program/

Kevin's Instagram.
https://www.instagram.com/kevinpwelsh/?hl=en

Guest: Captain David Hoy (Edmonton Fire Rescue Services)

How we handle the first 24 to 72 hours after a critical incident determines whether a call becomes a "memory" or a "trauma." In this episode, Nole and Kevin sit down with David Hoy, a 20-year fire captain and peer support specialist from the "Great White North" of Edmonton, Alberta.

Dave breaks down the "Gold Standard" of reintegration, a program that has led to a 75% reduction in long-term mental health claims, and shares the five physiological pillars every first responder needs to regulate their nervous system after a bad shift.

In This Episode, We Discuss:

• The Reintegration Whiteboard: How Edmonton’s "Gold Standard" program uses a specific debriefing process to identify "hotspots" before they become injuries.
• The Bio-Chemistry of Trauma: Why stimulants (caffeine/nicotine) and depressants (alcohol) during the 72-hour "encoding window" can permanently scar the brain’s storage of an event.
• The Trauma Backpack: A powerful analogy for identifying which burdens are yours to carry and which boulders need to be left at the station.
• "Dig Your Well Before You’re Thirsty": Practical advice on interviewing clinicians while you’re healthy to ensure you have a "tactical" baseline for when things go south.
• Functional Disconnection vs. Reconnection: The biological necessity of shutting down emotions on a call, and the specific relational tools needed to turn them back on when you walk through your front door.
• Sub-Zero Firefighting: What it’s like to fight fire at -30 and how to prevent getting literally frozen to your equipment.

The 5 Pillars of Post-Call Regulation:

If you’ve had a "bad night," Dave recommends hitting these five marks within 72 hours to restore homeostasis:

1. Hydration: Flushing the "lactic acid of trauma" out of your system.
2. Nutrition: Avoiding the "sugar-crash" cycle.
3. Exercise: Utilizing cardiovascular work to process adrenaline.
4. Sleep: The essential phase for brain restoration and memory filing.
5. Physical Connection: Utilizing the release of oxytocin through intimacy to reset the nervous system.

Big thank you to My Epic and Facedown Records for the use of their song "Hail" in our podcast!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Dz2RZThURTU&ab_channel=FacedownRecords

Get signed up for the next trip with Hold the Line!

https://www.fireupprogram.org/hold-the-line

The Fire You Carry on YouTube.

Sign up for a class at The Fire Up Program!
https://www.fireupprogram.com/programs

The Fire Up Progam video.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I__ErPW46Ec&t=12s&ab_channel=FireUpProgram

The Fire You Carry Instagram.
https://www.instagram.com/thefireyoucarry/

Donate to The Fire Up Program.
https://www.fireupprogram.com/donate

The Fire Up Program Instagram.
https://www.instagram.com/fireup_program/

Kevin's Instagram.
https://www.instagram.com/kevinpwelsh/?hl=en

Becoming a "program guy" or a trusted member of a crew isn't just about your skill with a nozzle; it’s about how you handle the "game" of probation. This week, Nole and Kevin sit down with Taylor Morgan (Program Director for The Fire Up Program) to discuss the nuances of station culture that aren't taught in the academy. From the "laundry room dilemma" to handling the dreaded call to the Captain’s office, we explore how small actions build, or break, your reputation.

In this episode, we cover:

• Ownership over BS: Why "I don’t know, sir, but I’ll find out" is the most important sentence in a new firefighter's vocabulary.
• The "Peanut Butter Spoon" Test: How menial station tasks are actually indicators of your reliability on a fire scene.
• Social Intelligence: The dangers of oversharing and why your actions should always speak louder than your resume.
• The "7-Foot Captain" Story: A lesson in why you should always have a tool in your hand (and which ones you shouldn't try to borrow).
• Mentorship & The Fire Up Program: How Taylor uses the fire service model to help men grow in leadership and character.

Big thank you to My Epic and Facedown Records for the use of their song "Hail" in our podcast!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Dz2RZThURTU&ab_channel=FacedownRecords

Get signed up for the next trip with Hold the Line!

https://www.fireupprogram.org/hold-the-line

The Fire You Carry on YouTube.

Sign up for a class at The Fire Up Program!
https://www.fireupprogram.com/programs

The Fire Up Progam video.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I__ErPW46Ec&t=12s&ab_channel=FireUpProgram

The Fire You Carry Instagram.
https://www.instagram.com/thefireyoucarry/

Donate to The Fire Up Program.
https://www.fireupprogram.com/donate

The Fire Up Program Instagram.
https://www.instagram.com/fireup_program/

Kevin's Instagram.
https://www.instagram.com/kevinpwelsh/?hl=en

Welcome back to The Fire You Carry! This week, Nole and Kevin sit down to tackle a feeling we all know too well: hitting a mental wall and finding yourself stuck in a "season of blah."

When you're down in the valley, sprinting out isn't an option. The guys discuss how getting your momentum back is all about returning to the foundational basics. We dive into the importance of prioritizing sleep, dialing in your nutrition with Stan Efferding’s "Vertical Diet" (meat, rice, and bone broth), and learning to focus your energy only on your direct sphere of influence.

Kevin and Nole also talk through the brutal reality of properly executing the Norwegian 4x4 VO2 Max protocol, the immune-boosting benefits of L-glutamine, and why putting on the "Dad Hat" and saying yes to your kids should always beat out finishing your household chores.

Big thank you to My Epic and Facedown Records for the use of their song "Hail" in our podcast!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Dz2RZThURTU&ab_channel=FacedownRecords

Get signed up for the next trip with Hold the Line!

https://www.fireupprogram.org/hold-the-line

The Fire You Carry on YouTube.

Sign up for a class at The Fire Up Program!
https://www.fireupprogram.com/programs

The Fire Up Progam video.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I__ErPW46Ec&t=12s&ab_channel=FireUpProgram

The Fire You Carry Instagram.
https://www.instagram.com/thefireyoucarry/

Donate to The Fire Up Program.
https://www.fireupprogram.com/donate

The Fire Up Program Instagram.
https://www.instagram.com/fireup_program/

Kevin's Instagram.
https://www.instagram.com/kevinpwelsh/?hl=en

This week, Nole sits down with Barry Nisbet, a retired Canadian Army Sniper with 15 years of service and multiple deployments to the Balkans and Afghanistan, and Mir Bahmanyar, an author, historian, and former member of the US Army's 2nd Ranger Battalion.

Together with Gordon Cullen, Barry and Mir co-authored the book Send It: Canada's Snipers at War in Afghanistan. In this episode, we strip away the romanticized Hollywood myth of the lone-wolf sniper to discuss the brutal reality of sniper selection, the agonizing physical toll of stalking exercises, and the heavy weight of operating downrange. Barry shares incredible firsthand stories, including a wild reunion with a US Green Beret he met at Ranger School, the terrifying aftermath of an IED blast, and the absolute relief of having an AC-130 Gunship overhead. Mir also drops some invaluable knowledge on the harsh realities of the publishing world for anyone looking to write a book of their own.

Whether you’re interested in military history, the tactical mindset, or just hearing incredible stories of brotherhood from the Global War on Terror, you won't want to miss this one.

Grab a copy of the book: Send It: Canada's Snipers at War in Afghanistan by Gordon Cullen, Barry Nisbet, and Mir Bahmanyar – available on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, and Indigo.

Big thank you to My Epic and Facedown Records for the use of their song "Hail" in our podcast!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Dz2RZThURTU&ab_channel=FacedownRecords

Get signed up for the next trip with Hold the Line!

https://www.fireupprogram.org/hold-the-line

The Fire You Carry on YouTube.

Sign up for a class at The Fire Up Program!
https://www.fireupprogram.com/programs

The Fire Up Progam video.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I__ErPW46Ec&t=12s&ab_channel=FireUpProgram

The Fire You Carry Instagram.
https://www.instagram.com/thefireyoucarry/

Donate to The Fire Up Program.
https://www.fireupprogram.com/donate

The Fire Up Program Instagram.
https://www.instagram.com/fireup_program/

Kevin's Instagram.
https://www.instagram.com/kevinpwelsh/?hl=en

In this solo episode, Nole reflects on a recent experience at the Hume Lake First Responders Conference that challenged his perspective on small talk and silence. From "evangelizing" about In-N-Out and CrossFit to the weight of staying quiet when a brother is heading off a cliff, Nole explores the moral responsibility of speaking up. Using the biblical imagery of the Watchman on the wall and the wisdom of Dietrich Bonhoeffer, this episode dives into why our silence can sometimes be a form of consent to things that destroy the people we care about.

In This Episode, We Discuss:

• The "Two-Minute" Rule: How Pastor Jim Stitzinger challenges us to bring our true identity into a conversation early.
• Identity & Evangelism: Why we find it so easy to talk about diets, hobbies, and gear, but stay silent on the things that actually matter.
• The Watchman on the Wall: Understanding Ezekiel 33 and the weight of seeing danger but failing to blow the trumpet.
• Truth in Love: How to offer a "faithful wound" to a friend without being combative or legalistic.
• The Seatbelt Analogy: Why keeping someone "comfortable" while they ruin their life isn't actually loving.
• The Supply Shed Reveal: A brief moment of transparency regarding the "YouTube vs. Reality" podcast setup.
• Book Recommendation: Bonhoeffer: Pastor, Martyr, Prophet, Spy by Eric Metaxas (A must-read on standing against evil).
• Scripture References: Ezekiel 33:6, Ephesians 4:15, Proverbs 27:5-6.
  
  

Big thank you to My Epic and Facedown Records for the use of their song "Hail" in our podcast!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Dz2RZThURTU&ab_channel=FacedownRecords

Get signed up for the next trip with Hold the Line!

https://www.fireupprogram.org/hold-the-line

The Fire You Carry on YouTube.

Sign up for a class at The Fire Up Program!
https://www.fireupprogram.com/programs

The Fire Up Progam video.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I__ErPW46Ec&t=12s&ab_channel=FireUpProgram

The Fire You Carry Instagram.
https://www.instagram.com/thefireyoucarry/

Donate to The Fire Up Program.
https://www.fireupprogram.com/donate

The Fire Up Program Instagram.
https://www.instagram.com/fireup_program/

Kevin's Instagram.
https://www.instagram.com/kevinpwelsh/?hl=en

MyZone facility code for The Fire You Carry: CALIFUS001

Get $60 off a MZ-Switch Heart Rate Monitor!
https://buy.myzone.org/?lang=enUS&voucher=CALIFUS001-60

In this episode, Nole and Kevin dive into the importance of environmental conditioning—both physical and mental. They discuss why training in the heat and "getting off the X" during life's toughest seasons is vital for first responders. From the restorative power of fly fishing with Hold the Line to the contagious nature of a leader’s attitude when things get tough. This conversation explores how we can better prepare ourselves for the inevitable ambushes of life.

Key Takeaways

• Training in the Elements: Nole emphasizes that since the job happens outside, your fitness should too. Acclimatizing to heat and discomfort ensures you can perform when the stakes are high.
• The Contagious Leader: Whether you are at the fire station or the dinner table, your mood sets the tone. The guys discuss the "vibe" and how music, attitude, and presence affect those around us.
• Navigating the Ambush: Life will inevitably "ambush" you with trouble. Borrowing from military and tactical concepts, Kevin and Nole discuss the importance of having an SOP (Standard Operating Procedure) for when things go wrong, starting with moving off the "X."
• The Healing Power of Water: A look at the science and soul behind being near water, featuring a highlight of the Hold the Line fly fishing program for first responders.
• The Forge of Life: A deep dive into the "terrible truth" that growth often requires being broken and reforged, drawing parallels between blacksmithing and spiritual development.

Big thank you to My Epic and Facedown Records for the use of their song "Hail" in our podcast!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Dz2RZThURTU&ab_channel=FacedownRecords

Get signed up for the next trip with Hold the Line!

https://www.fireupprogram.org/hold-the-line

The Fire You Carry on YouTube.

Sign up for a class at The Fire Up Program!
https://www.fireupprogram.com/programs

The Fire Up Progam video.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I__ErPW46Ec&t=12s&ab_channel=FireUpProgram

The Fire You Carry Instagram.
https://www.instagram.com/thefireyoucarry/

Donate to The Fire Up Program.
https://www.fireupprogram.com/donate

The Fire Up Program Instagram.
https://www.instagram.com/fireup_program/

Kevin's Instagram.
https://www.instagram.com/kevinpwelsh/?hl=en

MyZone facility code for The Fire You Carry: CALIFUS001

Get $60 off a MZ-Switch Heart Rate Monitor!
https://buy.myzone.org/?lang=enUS&voucher=CALIFUS001-60

What happens when a high-performance lifestyle hits a physical and mental wall? This week, Nole takes the mic for a solo session to deconstruct his recent "February crash." From a 130-hour fast and a back injury at work to the debilitating mental fog that followed, Nole shares a raw look at what happens when our "push" overrides our physiology.

The conversation moves from the gut to the brain, exploring the science of neuroplasticity, the physical restructuring of our neural pathways. Nole discusses why first responders get stuck in "threat-scanning" and "grousing" loops and offers two practical tools to help you rebuild your mind, lower your cortisol, and get back to being present for your family.

Key Topics:

• The Perfect Storm: How extreme fasting, injury, and work stress led to a month-long health crisis.
• The "Hallway Verses": Re-examining Philippians 4:8 and Romans 12:2 as practical manuals for mental health.
• Brain Hardware vs. Software: Why you need to "think better" before you can "feel better."
• First Responder Loops: The cost of staying in hypervigilant "threat-scan" mode once you're off the clock.
• The Reset Tools: A breakdown of the 5-Minute Journal and the "60-Second Verbal Gratitude Drill."

Big thank you to My Epic and Facedown Records for the use of their song "Hail" in our podcast!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Dz2RZThURTU&ab_channel=FacedownRecords

Get signed up for the next trip with Hold the Line!

https://www.fireupprogram.org/hold-the-line

The Fire You Carry on YouTube.

Sign up for a class at The Fire Up Program!
https://www.fireupprogram.com/programs

The Fire Up Progam video.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I__ErPW46Ec&t=12s&ab_channel=FireUpProgram

The Fire You Carry Instagram.
https://www.instagram.com/thefireyoucarry/

Donate to The Fire Up Program.
https://www.fireupprogram.com/donate

The Fire Up Program Instagram.
https://www.instagram.com/fireup_program/

Kevin's Instagram.
https://www.instagram.com/kevinpwelsh/?hl=en

MyZone facility code for The Fire You Carry: CALIFUS001

Get $60 off a MZ-Switch Heart Rate Monitor!
https://buy.myzone.org/?lang=enUS&voucher=CALIFUS001-60