Somewhere along the way, visibility got confused with exposure.

In this episode of The Dynamics of Everyday Life, Julia explores how sharing online has shifted from something intentional into something increasingly driven by anxiety. This isn’t an episode arguing for or against social media - Julia uses it for her business and enjoys it in her personal life too - but it is an invitation to pause and think about what happens when being seen tips into being uncontained.

Drawing on psychodynamic thinking, Julia looks at acting out as a primary defence mechanism, and how it shows up in everyday online behaviour. She unpacks why oversharing isn’t a moral failing, why being witnessed isn’t the same as being regulated, and how the pressure to be “authentic” can sometimes bypass reflection altogether.

This episode is for anyone who has ever felt the urge to post something just to get rid of a feeling, and wondered afterwards whether it actually helped.

Highlights of this episode:

(2.03) Visibility versus exposure

(4.48) When sharing is driven by anxiety

(5.12) Acting out as a primary defence

(7.24) Oversharing, regulation and performance

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In this episode, Julia explores our obsession with reinvention, why change doesn’t always equal growth, and what refinement, coherence and psychological settlement really look like.

This episode's highlights:

00:00 Welcome back, New Year reflections & a birthday aside

01:40 January, planners, noise and the pressure to reinvent

03:05 Madonna and the cultural fantasy of reinvention

04:35 When reinvention is driven by anxiety, not growth

06:20 When reinvention does make sense (and when it doesn’t)

07:35 Madonna vs Kylie: coherence, identity and psychic fit

09:00 Carolyn Bessette Kennedy and the authority of not scrambling

10:05 Closing reflection: staying with who you already are

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Welcome to another episode of The Dynamics of Everyday Life. In this festive episode, I dive into the unique emotional landscape leading up to Christmas, exploring why the “most wonderful time of the year” can also feel overwhelming, exhausting, or even anticlimactic.

The Long Build-Up:

• How Christmas has become an extended season, starting as early as July for some retailers, and why this drawn-out anticipation can drain our emotional reserves.

Emotional Fatigue:

• With all the pressures—shopping, family logistics, work deadlines, and the ever-present festive expectations—it’s common to arrive at Christmas Eve simply feeling "done."

00:01:43 – 00:02:51:

• lets look at different retailers' early preparations, and explain why the beginning of December can feel like an ending, with build-up causing exhaustion.

00:02:51 – 00:03:34:

• how depleted people often feel by Christmas Eve, my wish for sleep, and the tasks that would be gifted upon surprise celebrity guests.

00:03:35 – 00:04:17:

• exploring the theme of endings, psychological suppression, and the classic “I’ll do it after Christmas” approach.

00:04:17 – 00:04:50:

• listing the feelings stirred up by endings—reflection, loss, relief—often outside of conscious awareness, compounded by tiredness and media expectations.

00:04:51 – 00:06:13:

• highlighting the pressures of the season, from family logistics to work deadlines, and how Christmas removes distractions, letting buried feelings surface.

This episode is all about self-compassion during the holidays—acknowledging realistic feelings and setting aside the pressure to make everything perfect. Whether you’re curled up with a film, or just relieved you made it through, this conversation is for you.

Don’t forget to subscribe, and check the show notes for links to courses, YouTube, and contact info!

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