This is part two of my life story — and it's the chapter I've never shared this openly before.

In this episode I take you through leaving my mother's home to move in with my father, whose addiction shaped everything about the environment I grew up in. I share my introduction to drugs at thirteen, how I started selling to support my habit, my first real relationship and the heartbreak that sent me into a spiral, and how by sixteen I was selling hundreds of pills a week and making thousands of dollars — until the night I was robbed at gunpoint and nearly beaten to death, and what followed after that.

This one is heavy. But it's real. And if you've been with me since the beginning, this is where a lot of what I teach started to take shape — even though I couldn't see it yet.

If you're in a relationship with an avoidant man and you can't figure out why he keeps pulling away no matter what you do I want to share something with you that most people in this space won't tell you.

Your anxious attachment and his avoidant attachment are the same pattern. You're both avoiding intimacy. You're both afraid of the same thing. The only difference is how you're expressing it. He runs. You chase. But underneath both of those behaviors is the exact same wound.

And here's what that means practically — every time you pursue him, you're activating the very thing that makes him pull away. And every time he pulls away, he's activating the very thing that makes you chase harder. You're not opposites. You're mirrors.

Here, I'm breaking down exactly how this pattern works out in real life and what it means to love an avoidant man into staying.

Click here to book private sessions with Shane Take the Relational Blueprint Quiz here.

If you’ve ever said “I just never meet anyone worth dating” — this episode is going to challenge that story directly.

Not because it isn’t true. But because the story itself might be doing something for you that has nothing to do with the actual supply of men.

In this episode I get into the real math of dating, why the environments most women are placing themselves in are working against them, what happens when attraction becomes the barrier to connection instead of the result of it, and the one pattern that shows up whether you’re choosing a hobby or choosing a partner.

Hit play. And when you’re done, take the quiz to find out which Relational Blueprint has been quietly running your love life.

Click here to book sessions with Shane directly. Episode Chapters:

00:00 Valuing Connection Over Control 02:54 Understanding Internal and External Barriers 06:02 The Challenge of Creating Partnerships 10:03 Expanding Comfort Zones for Growth 15:54 Idealized Standards in Relationships 21:50 The Toxicity of Attraction Standards 27:36 Examining Internal Limitations 33:07 The Importance of Connection Over Superficial Standards 38:16 Dating as a Numbers Game 47:29 The Power of Vulnerability in Dating 57:48 The Reality of Modern Dating