#495: Boyz II Men - II (1994)

The Abrahams brace themselves for album #495: II by the R&B vocal powerhouse Boyz II Men. Abraham and AbraHAM immediately lock horns with Rolling Stone’s bizarre blurb, questioning the existence of "mammoth hits," "audaciously Baroque" tracks, and interludes that supposedly leave you "sobbing in the fetal position."

They dive into the Philadelphia group’s performing arts high school origins, their unique four-lead-singer dynamic, and the heavy-hitting production roster (including Babyface and his legendary run). However, technical perfection doesn't necessarily equal a great listening experience. The hosts vent their frustrations over the album's arbitrary sequencing, pandering spoken-word intros, and a 60-minute runtime that completely overstays its welcome—proving it's the absolute wrong soundtrack for packing up an apartment.

Is this the pinnacle of 90s R&B, or just "sexy music without the sex"? Why is there a woman speaking French on a track by guys from Philly? And most importantly, how did one of the hosts manage to completely misunderstand the lyrics to The Beatles' "Yesterday" for 30 years?

In This Episode

• (00:00:00) - Welcome to The Abraham Records
• (00:01:20) - This Week's Album: #495, Boyz II Men - II
• (00:02:11) - Roasting the Blurb: "Mammoth Hits", "Audaciously Baroque", and Fetal Positions
• (00:05:18) - The Album Art & The Infuriating "II" Title Logic (It's their third album)
• (00:07:49) - Band Origins: Philly High School Choirs, Questlove, and Four Lead Singers
• (00:12:44) - Initial Impressions: Packing Anger and Arbitrary Album Sequencing
• (00:14:35) - Pandering Intros: "Jezebel" Subway Rides and Unexplained French in "All Around the World"
• (00:16:33) - Producer Spotlight: Jimmy Jam, Terry Lewis, and Babyface's "Man Child" Past
• (00:22:23) - Track Attack: "Yesterday" (Why does this a cappella Beatles cover exist?)
• (00:24:20) - Tangent: 30 Years of Mishearing Paul McCartney's Lyrics
• (00:28:59) - Vocal Critique: Tempo Drops, Melismas, and Unnecessary Bloat
• (00:30:39) - "Sexy Music Without the Sex": Technical Perfection vs. R&B Rawness
• (00:32:25) - Track Attack: "Thank You" (Hip-Hop Doo-Wop & Imaginary Serving Trays)
• (00:36:06) - The EP Dilemma: A 60-Minute Album That Overstays Its Welcome
• (00:38:28) - The Final Verdict: Grammys vs. Artistry (and a plea for classic Motown)

About The Abraham Records

Welcome to The Abraham Records, where we cover the 500 “greatest” albums of all time according to Rolling Stone Magazine, but certainly not according to us.

Join us on an odyssey of discovery to determine which albums are truly great and which ones will hurt your face.

• Listen & Subscribe: https://rss.com/podcasts/the-abraham-records
• Send us your hot takes: podcasts@shufu.studio

Special Edition: Jesus Christ Superstar (1970)

It’s a Christmas miracle! The Abrahams take a break from the tyranny of the Rolling Stone 500 list to discuss a mutually adored masterpiece: the original 1970 concept album of Jesus Christ Superstar. Abraham (Chenzie) and AbraHAM (Guy) deep dive into "Abraham Lore," revealing how this specific album cemented their friendship back in music school (after some initial arrogance).

Since this album isn't actually on the list, the hosts turn to ChatGPT to generate a "Rolling Stone style" blurb. Which, shockingly, turns out to be better written than the real thing. They break down the raw, "Woodstockian" sound of the recording, featuring Deep Purple's Ian Gillan screaming his lungs out as Jesus to the backing of Joe Cocker's Grease Band.

Is Andrew Lloyd Webber a genius of leitmotifs or just a lazy-ass hack who recycles melodies? Is the New Testament essentially "fanfic" of the Old Testament? And why does the violin solo in the epilogue sound suspiciously like Schindler’s List? Join us for a theological, musicological and (mostly) hysterical breakdown of the one of the greatest rock operas ever recorded (according to us!!!)

In This Episode

• (00:00:00) - Welcome to The Abraham Records: Christmas Special
• (00:01:40) - Abraham Lore: How this album cemented the hosts' friendship
• (00:04:27) - The "AI" Blurb: Using ChatGPT to generate a Rolling Stone critique
• (00:10:44) - The Personnel: Ian Gillan (Deep Purple) and The Grease Band
• (00:15:00) - Origin Story: Why it started as an album (and the "Gospel of Judas")
• (00:18:55) - Compositional Analysis: Leitmotifs vs. "Recycling" Melodies
• (00:26:10) - The Theological Rant: The New Testament, blood libels, and anti-semitism
• (00:30:50) - The Mary Magdalene Debate: Is Yvonne Elliman high or just too confident?
• (00:37:50) - The Overture: Why foreshadowing with 39 lashes is a bold move
• (00:40:38) - Historical Fact-Check: Pilates, Herods, and the geography of Galilee
• (00:46:12) - Genre Definition: Comparing JCS to Tommy and Pink Floyd’s The Wall
• (00:49:37) - Music Theory Corner: Asymmetric time signatures (7/8 and 5/4 grooves)
• (00:51:19) - Vocal Showdown: Ian Gillan’s "Hard Rock" vs. Ted Neeley’s "Glam Metal"
• (00:59:41) - Deep Dive: "John 19:41" and the Itzhak Perlman cameo
• (01:03:30) - Character Spotlight: Barry Dennen's overacting excellence as Pilate
• (01:05:00) - The Judas Legacy: Murray Head's funk soul vs. Carl Anderson's iconic movie role
• (01:09:00) - The Final Verdict: Does this belong in the real Top 500? (Yes.)

About The Abraham Records

Welcome to The Abraham Records, where we cover the 500 “greatest” albums of all time according to Rolling Stone Magazine, but certainly not according to us.

Join us on an odyssey of discovery to determine which albums are truly great and which ones will hurt your face.

• Listen & Subscribe: https://rss.com/podcasts/the-abraham-records
• Send us your hot takes: podcasts@shufu.studio

#496: Shakira - Dónde Están los Ladrones? (1998)

The Abrahams a here with album #496: Donde Estan Los Ladrones by the Colombian superstar Shakira. Abraham (Chenzie) and AbraHAM (Guy) are surprised to discover that before she was the blonde, hip-shaking global icon, Shakira was a "raven-haired guitar rocker" who sounded suspiciously like a Spanish Avril Lavigne.

They dive into the "logic" of the Rolling Stone blurb (if hips can't speak, can they lie?), the story of the stolen suitcase that inspired the album's title, and the unique fusion of Colombian rock and middle eastern grooves. But overall, this episode is just a one big Shakira appreciation session: her songwriting chops, production instincts and that instantly recognizable voice

Is this album a masterpiece of "Rock en Español" or just a collection of Alanis Morissette b-sides? Why are her hands so dirty on the cover? And how does a discussion about vocal techniques spiral into a dark tangent about a Japanese yodeler's potential connection to the Hitler Youth?

In This Episode

• (00:00:00) - Welcome to The Abraham Records
• (00:01:20) - This Week's Album: #496, Shakira - Donde Estan Los Ladrones
• (00:02:32) - Roasting the Blurb: The Logical Fallacy of "Never-Lying Hips"
• (00:05:37) - Cultural Fusion: Combining Colombian Roots with Lebanese Heritage (and Belly Dancing)
• (00:09:17) - Deep Dive: The Album Art & The "Stolen Suitcase" Origin Story
• (00:11:39) - The career bridge convo: Emilio Estefan, the pivot toward English, and Laundry Service
• (00:14:42) - Shakira as a Songwriter: More than just a Pop Diva
• (00:16:45) - Genre Analysis: Is "Rock en Español" just Avril Lavigne in Spanish?
• (00:18:40) - 1998 Context: Dana International's Eurovision Win & The Era of Britney
• (00:23:20) - Track Attack: "Inevitable" (The Vulnerable Ballad)
• (00:25:07) - Track Attack: "Octavo Día" (prog-rock edge, rubato feel, vocal flexing)
• (00:26:54) - Vocal Analysis: The "Shakira Yodel," Jack Black, and Intentional Voice Cracks
• (00:30:15) - Track Attack: "Ojos Así" (The Middle Eastern Beach Party)
• (00:32:05) - Final verdict: recommended, but not Top-500 material
• (00:34:25) - Tangent corner: Japanese yodeling lore (because… of course)
• (00:37:16) - Field test: playing the album at the office (coworkers be grooving)
• (00:41:47) - Fun Facts: Shakira's Real Name & Her Father, William Mubarak
• (00:44:10) - Next week: Boyz II Men (it’s time to "man up")

About The Abraham Records

Welcome to The Abraham Records, where we cover the 500 “greatest” albums of all time according to Rolling Stone Magazine, but certainly not according to us.

Join us on an odyssey of discovery to determine which albums are truly great and which ones will hurt your face.

• Listen & Subscribe: https://rss.com/podcasts/the-abraham-records
• Send us your hot takes: podcasts@shufu.studio