A Canadian, an American and a Brit walk into a bar… for a light-hearted discussion about alcohol. Our experiences of it and our social obsession with it. Are you into it, or over it?

Host Linda McLachlan and friends, Vijay Chavda and Ryan Geismar chat about how alcohol has played a role in their lives - from childhood to parenthood. How have things around us changed, how have we changed? Is sobriety (or some level of abstinence) easier or harder now? And what are the options?

So… are you into it, or over it?

Linda openly acknowledges the generous and life changing writing and work of Ann Dowsett Johnston writer of Drink: The Intimate Relationship Between Women and Alcohol and Annie Grace writer of This Naked Mind: Control Alcohol, Find Freedom, Discover Happiness & Change Your Life. Both Ann and Annie’s work helped her choose to live sober since April 27, 2019.

Originally recorded on Fireside Chat with an interactive audience. This is an edit version of that conversation.

To see the 'live' version of this or other episodes Linda has done on Fireside, check them out here: www.firesidechat.com/lindamclachlan

The host of THE ARENA - Living a Courageous Life is Linda McLachlan. All episodes are available via: THE ARENA - Living a Courageous Life website.

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And the legal bits, please note:

Explicit

2020-2022 THE ARENA

Cindy Villanova is a daughter, sister, mother, and grandmother. She’s an author, consultant, entrepreneur and public speaker. She’s also a seventh degree black belt, master instructor and the owner of a martial arts studio in Austin, Texas.

Cindy’s parents were a mixed race couple in the early 1960s in southern California. They faced prejudice but stressed to Cindy and her brother the importance of an education, and growing up to be ‘good’. Cindy worked hard and was an ‘A’ student. She had big dreams to be a lawyer and to enter politics, but instead she became pregnant as a teenager by her boyfriend, a very troubled young man. She chose not to give up the baby. It was one of many forks in the road of her life.

While there were two failed marriages, many physical injuries from her martial arts practice and financial troubles along the way, there were also triumphs and turnarounds. Her book Don't Fight Mad generously chronicles, these many painful twists and turns. She parallels what mixed martial arts taught her about digging in, when she most wanted to give up.

SOCIAL

Facebook: CindyVillanuevaAuthor

LinkedIn: cindyvillanueva

Instagram: cvillanueva_author

Website: https://cindyvillanueva.com/

The host of THE ARENA - Living a Courageous Life is Linda McLachlan. All episodes are available via: THE ARENA - Living a Courageous Life website.

Follow Linda on: Facebook LinkedIn

Explicit

2020-2022 THE ARENA

Jean-Sébastien Cournoyer aka ‘JS’. He’s a son, brother, husband and father of 5 children.

JS is a venture capitalist and entrepreneur. He’s the co-founder of Real Ventures and Montreal Startups. Both are early-stage venture capital firms that backs entrepreneurs and build the ecosystems in which they thrive. JS has primarily worked with entrepreneurs who are using AI, blockchain technologies, AR/VR and synthetic biology to improve happiness, human creativity, and communication — and transform or disrupt the pillars of our society (health, education, food, energy, government, finance, work).

In 2018 he had a profound experience that shifted his perspective of himself, his relationships and the world around him. While he’s loved his work, JS is now taking a slightly different role in the company he founded.

JS’s Social contacts:

Website Real Ventures: https://realventures.com/

Twitter: @jscournoyer

LinkedIn: jscournoyer

The host of THE ARENA - Living a Courageous Life is Linda McLachlan. All episodes are available via: THE ARENA - Living a Courageous Life website.

Follow Linda on: Facebook LinkedIn

And the legal bits, please note:

Explicit

2020-2022 THE ARENA

Anne Bokma is a daughter, sister and mother. Anne’s also an award-winning journalist, writing coach, workshop leader and author. Anne is also the founder of Hamilton’s popular 6-Minute Memoir live storytelling event which has also become a podcast, also called the 6-Minute Memoir.

Growing up in a fundamentalist sect, the Canadian Reform Church, her world view was extremely narrow. There were lots of taboos. Dancing, and Canadian boys were off the table.

When Anne went off to journalism school, she was suddenly exposed to different points of view, religions, and ways of being. At 20 years old she made the painful decision to leave her church, even though she was threatened with ex-communication and burning in hell. She ultimately chose to leave which created a rift between her and her family.

Fast forward, Anne was a mother and wife. Her children were about to leave home and found herself in a mid-life crisis. Her journalistic curiosity and spiritual longing prompted the exploration of a growing movement “Spiritual But Not Religious'“.

She started a blog and began to explore 24 different spiritual practices over the course of a year. From goat yoga and forest bathing to a gratitude practice and hallucinogenics. From there she wrote her memoir, My Year of Living Spiritually: One Woman’s Secular Quest for a More Soulful Life. It’s a wonderful, funny, insightful, and touching book.

Anne’s Social Media:

Website: https://www.annebokma.com

Facebook: anne.bokma.1

Twitter: @anne_bokma

Instagram: @annebokma

About THE ARENA

The host of THE ARENA - Living a Courageous Life is Linda McLachlan. All episodes are available via: www.thearena-podcast.com.

Follow Linda on: Facebook LinkedIn

If you enjoyed this episode, please leave a review: https://lovethepodcast.com/thearena or share it with a friend.

Amy Conway-Hatcher is a mother, daughter, wife, sister and middle child, attorney and a former Federal prosecutor. After 6 years as a prosecutor, Amy moved to private practice eventually becoming an equity partner in one of several firms that make up what is known as ‘Big Law’. These large legal entities with sometimes thousands of lawyers and offices in countries all over the world.

She was often one of the ‘only’, or certainly very few women who had attained her level of compensation and respect. She was and is a woman that others looked up to and aspired to be.

You were a warrior career mom. And she never let them see her sweat.

But, it seemed no matter how many hours, how many clients, how many extras she undertook to make it to each successive level of achievement, there was an acknowledged and apparently insurmountable imbalance between her and her male counterparts – both at the board table and the kitchen table.

She changed firms a few times to bridge the compensation gap but the rules were simply different for women. The compensation, the opportunities, as well as the expectation of complicity when it came to boorish behavior, and the appearance of diversity and inclusion.

And the pace never let up - for years. Her children were becoming teenagers, her parents were having health issues and so was she.

In the end, she did the unthinkable. She handed in her resignation on International Women’s Day, in 2021. She left the career that had been her whole life.

Since then there have been numerous articles written about the ‘Great Resignation’. One article in particular compelled her to speak and write about her experiences, which resulted in her wonderful book: Infinitely More: Choosing Freedom, A Career Mom’s Turning Point.

Amy is paying it forward.

All proceeds of Infinitely More will be donated to non-profits that support women and girls, including the Girl Up (UN Foundation), Together Rising, Women's Bar Association Foundation of the District of Columbia, and YoungLeaders.World.

Book: Infinitely More: Choosing Freedom, A Career Mom’s Turning Point.

FB: @Amy Conway-Hatcher

E: aconwayhatcher.author@gmail.com

#whywomenleave #wecandobetter

J. Paul Nadeau is a brother and father. He’s the son of a violently abusive, alcoholic father. At 7 years old he decided he wanted to be a police officer so he could arrest his own father.

Life in school was not much better as Paul was conditioned to believe he was worthless and incapable of amounting to much. At 16, his father killed himself with the same rifle he had claimed to have killed Santa Claus when Paul was 8.

This treatment could have set him on a pretty grim path. Instead, at 21 years old he chose his own destiny and became a police officer, and then sargeant in Durham Region outside of Toronto. He continued to set the bar higher by becoming an expert Hostage Negotiator, Criminal Detective, Expert Interrogator, International Peace Keeper and instructor. There were plenty of pivotal cases, personal setbacks and shocking events in his 30-year career in policing.

He’s now an international keynote speaker, actor, coach and best-selling author of “Take Control of Your Life,” which distills the valuable lessons he’s lived and learned through his personal and professional experiences.

J. Paul Nadeau’s Social Media Links:

Website: www.jpaulnadeau.com

Podcast Inspire Us: www.inspireus.ca

LinkedIn: https://ca.linkedin.com/in/jpaulnadeau

IG: jpaulnadeau

Twitter: jpaulnadeau

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If you enjoyed this episode please leave us a review:

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Niti Nadarajah is a sister, daughter, and Senior Counsel at Philip Morris in Australia. She worked as a lawyer in private practice in Australia and the UK before moving in-house to Philip Morris.

She is the mother of four babies. She has a 7-year old daughter and a 2-year old son. Between their births she experienced the anticipatory joy of pregnancy and the very private devastation of miscarrying two babies.

She had a thriving career, and she and her husband wanted to start a family. They were blessed with a daughter. Looking back, she felt that she may have had a bit of post-partum. A few years later, she was pregnant with their second child. She shared with her family and daughter, who was 3 at the time, that she was going to have a baby brother or sister.

Then she went for her 8-week ultrasound scan. The look on her doctor’s face told her something was wrong.

They had to wait another 8 or 9 months before trying again. She became pregnant though with much more trepidation. She was closely monitored. And then another missed miscarriage. And she was swept in the ocean of grief once more.

She decided to try one last time. And her son was born. Their miracle, their rainbow baby.

After a long period of very private grief and silence about what she went through, she is now sharing her story knowing that there are so many women and families that suffer in silence. The shame, the guilt, the excruciating pain that they try to keep to themselves. Niti hopes to help others by sharing her story.

Timestamps:

[03:43] Intro Niti Nadarajah

[06:01] Niti growing up

[10:18] First pregnancy

[16:33] Second pregnancy

[22:19] Silent grief

[24:55] Shared experiences

[26:47] Marriage impact

[30:58] Third pregnancy

[33:46] How can you help a person in grief?

[38:22] What event...

[39:54] What does living a courageous...

[42:29] Legacy?

[43:08 ] Visible version of Niti

[45:03] Last day?

[45:28] 5 minute conversation?

[47:27] What would you ask?

[48:58] Compassionate silence

[50:36] Anything else?

Social media

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/niti-nadarajah/

Mr. Gohl passed away peacefully on January 13, 2022. He was 100 years young. He is reunited with his beloved Marjorie and missed by his loving children, grandchildren, former students and friends. Rest in peace, sir.

Season 1, Episode 10: 99 Years Young

Ron Gohl was 99 years young as of August 4, 2020. He was a son, father, grandfather and WWII veteran. He wanted to join the Air Force to become a pilot but because of his poor eyesight, he become radar mechanic and later a radar operator. Following the war he held various jobs, finally becoming a teacher, and then was promoted to vice-principal and principal before he retired.

He visited or lived in most provinces and territories in Canada. He lived through many of the major historical events we can think of over the last century. During the pandemic, he had heart surgery and lived in his condo under the watchful eye of his children and grandchildren.

I spoke to him about his life and thoughts about what we were living through during the pandemic.