If you’ve ever felt guilty resting or over-delivered, this episode will resonate. Today, Rita breaks down The Achiever Identity - the role so many high-performing women unconsciously step into when they learn their worth comes from productivity, perfection, and emotional over-responsibility.

This identity isn’t just about being driven.
It’s about survival patterns formed in childhood, where doing more, fixing more, and achieving more became a way to manage chaos, avoid conflict, and stabilize everyone else’s emotional world.

In this episode, you’ll learn how the Achiever Identity forms, how it ties directly into codependent over-functioning, how it affects your nervous system, and what it truly costs you in adulthood. Rita also shares a hilarious yet powerful personal story from her Codependence Anonymous meeting - one that will help you see these patterns in yourself with compassion and humor.

Unpack the parts of you that hustle for worthiness and step into aligned leadership and emotional freedom.

(Part 2 of the 4-part Identity Series)

Top 4 Takeaways

1. Achievers aren’t needy - they over-function, stabilizing and managing everyone else.
2. This identity forms in childhood when chaos forces a child into “adult mode.”
3. “Never enoughness” defines both the Achiever and the Poverty Wound.
4. Rewiring takes emotional and nervous system work, not more productivity hacks.

Timestamps

[01:40–04:40] How achievers confuse performance with worthiness

[04:40–08:00] Over-functioning as codependency in disguise

[08:00–14:30] Childhood roots: chaos, survival, responsibility too young

[14:30–21:00] How the Achiever Identity plays out in adulthood

[21:00–29:00] Why achievers feel empty even when successful

[45:00–58:00] Deep identity work: discomfort, nervous system rewiring, boundaries

Resources & Links:

• “Whose discomfort am I managing right now?”
• “What emotional weight am I holding that was never mine?"
• “Is this action aligned… or is it fear?”

Wealth & Wisdom 2026 + Wealth & Wisdom Leadership Collective Waitlist - For women ready to shift identity, build wealth, and stop over-functioning.

→ Sign up here: [Wealth & Wisdom 2026 Waitlist]
→ Sign up here: [Wealth & Wisdom Leadership Collective 2026 Waitlist]

Sign up for The Art of Aligned Living - Weekly mindset, money, and nervous system wisdom → [Subscribe Here]

Join the 30-Day Meditation Challenge - Daily grounding and emotional regulation → Sign up here [30-Day Meditation Challenge]

Please be sure to tag me @RitaMarieMendez on Instagram and share this episode with your community to spread the word if you or someone you know has benefited from this episode! I'd love to hear about your experience!

If you love the podcast please click below to rate, review and follow - thank you!
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Links/Resources:

Rita's Website: Go to the Website
Contact us here: admin@ritamarieconsulting.com

Join the 30-Day Meditation Challenge - We start November 19th, 2025!
15 minutes a day. Live with Rita.
Release old patterns and create a new baseline of peace, clarity, and alignment.
Sign up here → [30-Day Meditation Challenge]

If you’ve ever felt constant money anxiety - even when you’re earning, saving, budgeting, or “doing the work” - this episode explains exactly why. In Part 1 of the Identity Series, Rita breaks down The Poverty Wound Identity: a deep unconscious pattern rooted in early scarcity, instability, and emotional survival.

Most women think they have a money problem.
They don’t.
They have a nervous system pattern built in childhood - one that tells the body it’s unsafe, unsupported, or “not enough,” even when money is coming in.

In this episode, you’ll learn how the Poverty Wound forms, why it bypasses logic, why high-achieving women still have money panic, and how it connects to codependency, over-functioning, fear-based decision-making, and self-abandonment.

This episode starts the 4-part Identity Series and helps you understand your money story.

Top 3 Takeaways:

1. The Poverty Wound is about identity, not income.
2. Childhood scarcity wiring shapes your money patterns and nervous system responses.
3. Healing requires safety, emotional awareness, and identity shifts, not more grinding.

Timestamps

[01:30] What the Poverty Wound actually is

[04:00] Why money feels unsafe (no matter how much you have)

[07:45] Childhood origins of scarcity wiring

[13:00] Nervous system patterns + survival-mode spending

[17:20] How codependency shows up in your money life

[22:00] Why high achievers still feel “not enough” financially

[26:30] How to begin shifting the Poverty Wound identity

Resources & Links:

• “What does money ‘mean’ to me emotionally?”
• “Where in my body do I feel money fear?”
• “What did I learn about safety, stability, and survival growing up?”

Sign up for The Art of Aligned Living - Weekly mindset, money, and nervous system wisdom → [Subscribe Here]

Join the 30-Day Meditation Challenge - Daily grounding and emotional regulation → Sign up here [30-Day Meditation Challenge]

Wealth & Wisdom 2026 + Wealth & Wisdom Leadership Collective Waitlist - For women ready to shift identity, build wealth, and stop over-functioning.

→ Sign up here: [Wealth & Wisdom 2026 Waitlist]
→ Sign up here: [Wealth & Wisdom Leadership Collective 2026 Waitlist]

Please be sure to tag me @RitaMarieMendez on Instagram and share this episode with your community to spread the word if you or someone you know has benefited from this episode! I'd love to hear about your experience!

If you love the podcast please click below to rate, review and follow - thank you!
Rate, Review, & Follow on Apple Podcasts

Links/Resources:

Rita's Website: Go to the Website
Contact us here: admin@ritamarieconsulting.com

Episode Summary:

In this powerful episode, Rita dives deep into the sneaky ways codependent behaviors infiltrate every area of life - from business and money to relationships and self-worth. She shares her own story of awakening to the drama and chaos that kept her stuck, unpacks how language patterns like “can’t,” “have to,” “always,” and “never” reinforce victim energy, and guides you toward awareness, empowerment, and freedom.
You’ll walk away with clarity, new awareness of hidden patterns, and practical exercises to reclaim your energy, boundaries, and voice.

Top 5 Takeaways:

1. Codependency is behavioral, not your identity. It’s a pattern you learned - and you can unlearn it.
2. Language reveals your programming. Words like “can’t” or “have to” signal victimhood and keep you disempowered.
3. The Drama Triangle runs unconsciously until you bring awareness to it - victim, rescuer, and persecutor roles all stem from the same root.
4. Rescuing ≠ helping. True support empowers others; rescuing depletes you and reinforces dependency.
5. Clarity is your superpower. Awareness + acceptance + aligned action = empowerment and freedom.
   
   

Timestamps:

[02:40] “How you do one thing is how you do everything” - the wake-up moment
[07:30] Codependency in business: rescuing clients & over-responsibility
[12:00] Money patterns: discounting yourself and overgiving
[16:30] The rescuer archetype & burnout
[21:00] The Drama Triangle explained: bully, victim, rescuer
[26:30] The power of language & Rita’s “no-fly words”
[33:40] Reflection questions & awareness practices

Resources & Links:

The Wealthy Woman Collective (8-Week Group Program ) → Learn More

Newsletter:The Art of Aligned Living → Subscribe Here

Book recommendation: Codependent No More by Melody Beattie

Affirmations:

• I choose language that empowers me.
• Clarity is my power.
• I release fear and scarcity thinking.
• I honor my needs and trust others to handle theirs.

Please be sure to tag me @RitaMarieMendez on Instagram and share this episode with your community to spread the word if you or someone you know has benefited from this episode! I'd love to hear about your experience!

If you love the podcast please click below to rate, review and follow - thank you!
Rate, Review, & Follow on Apple Podcasts

Links/Resources:

Rita's Website: Go to the Website
Contact us here: admin@ritamarieconsulting.com

Episode Summary:

After a month-long pause, Rita returns with one of her most powerful episodes yet - centered on the Law of Attraction, Cause vs. Effect, and the power of receiving. She reads a heartfelt prayer for women stepping into new chapters, then dives deep into how beliefs shape reality, why “desire is divine,” and how to shift from waiting for life to change to actively co-creating with it. This episode is a reminder that you are not “too much,” your desires are sacred, and it’s okay to want more….even when life already feels good.

Top 5 Takeaways:

1. The Law of Attraction is exacting: you don’t attract what you want, you attract who you are being.
2. Cause vs. Effect: living “at effect” keeps you in blame, excuses, and the Drama Triangle. Living “at cause” means owning your energy, choices, and results.
3. Beliefs become limitations: most of us unconsciously run beliefs planted in childhood that block prosperity and joy. Question them.
4. Receiving is active: stop shooing away compliments, opportunities, and abundance. Being open is an at-cause state.
5. Desire is not greed, it’s Divine: your longings are your roadmap, proof that more is available to you.

Timestamps:

[00:00] Welcome back + prayer for women in new chapters

[05:40] Why the Law of Attraction is as real as gravity

[12:15] Cause vs. Effect: shifting out of the Drama Triangle

[20:30] Client stories of staying at effect vs. moving to cause

[28:45] Receiving as your divine feminine birthright

[36:00] Desire is not greed: it’s okay to want more

[42:15] Releasing the “I’m too much” belief + reclaiming worth

Resources & Links:

Join the FREE Wealthy Woman Deep Dive on September 25, 2025 → Register Here

The Wealthy Woman Collective (8-Week Group Program ) → Learn More

Join me on 9/17/2025 for a LIVE Workshop in Bothel, WA → More Info

Newsletter:The Art of Aligned Living → Subscribe Here

Please be sure to tag me @RitaMarieMendez on Instagram and share this episode with your community to spread the word if you or someone you know has benefited from this episode! I'd love to hear about your experience!

If you love the podcast please click below to rate, review and follow - thank you!
Rate, Review, & Follow on Apple Podcasts

Links/Resources:

Rita's Website: Go to the Website
Contact us here: admin@ritamarieconsulting.com

Episode Summary:

“You’re not lost. You’re not behind. You’re in a sacred space. This is expansion"

In this milestone 50th episode, Rita takes you on a deep-dive journey through the messy middle - that liminal space between the old identity you’re shedding and the future self you’re becoming. She shares her personal stories, universal truths, and powerful mindset and somatic tools for navigating emotional overwhelm, identity shifts, and internal chaos with grounded courage.

This episode is spiritual and practical, fierce and compassionate, offering everything you need to move through transition with grace and momentum.

Top 5 Takeaways:

1. The Messy Middle is Sacred
That in-between space isn't failure, it's transformation. You're not broken; you're becoming.

2. Awareness is Power
Emotional mastery starts with recognizing you’re in a loop, a trigger, or an identity shift and not letting it define you.

3. You Are Not Your Emotions
Instead of “I am sad,” shift to “I feel sad.” This small language tweak separates your identity from your experience.

4. The Market Is Between Your Ears
Your mindset, not external conditions, shapes your reality.

5. Action Is the Way Out
You can’t think your way into your next self. You must embody her/him now. Start with one grounded choice.

Timestamps:

[08:15] Why Familiarity Isn’t Safety—and Why We Stay Stuck

[16:08] Emotional Flatlining, Grief & Looking Over Your Shoulder

[20:10] Identity, Expansion, and the Drama Triangle

[25:45] Emotional Mastery Defined (and Why It Changes Everything)

[32:26] 3-Step Tool #1: Awareness & Identity Inquiry

[38:04] 60-Second Reset – Somatic Tool #2: Box Breathing + Self-Soothing

[43:00] Embodiment Tool #3: Grounded Future Self Activation

Resources & Next Steps:

Money Mastermind – September 2025: Join The Waitlist!

Rita’s Real Talk Facebook Group – Join here

Newsletter: The Art of Aligned Living : Sign Up Here

Please be sure to tag me @RitaMarieMendez on Instagram and share this episode with your community to spread the word if you or someone you know has benefited from this episode! I'd love to hear about your experience!

If you love the podcast please click below to rate, review and follow - thank you!
Rate, Review, & Follow on Apple Podcasts

Links/Resources:

Rita's Website: Go to the Website
Contact us here: admin@ritamarieconsulting.com

Episode Summary:

In this powerful episode, Rita dives deep into what it really means to be ready for a bigger life. She shares the three signs that you’re ready (even if you’re scared), why fear is boring, and how to let go of limiting beliefs, old patterns, and the identity that no longer fits you. If you’re tired of choosing struggle over unknown joy, this episode is your green light.

Top 5 Takeaways:

1. Fear is boring
Fear keeps you in mediocrity, repeating the same patterns without growth.

2. 3 signs you’re ready for a bigger life:

1. You’re uncomfortable with the version of you that’s staying small.
2. Your life feels “fine” but not fulfilling.
3. You can’t unsee the bigger vision within you.
   
   

3. Your beliefs shape your reality.
Thoughts repeated become beliefs, and beliefs drive your decisions.

4. You can’t hold onto the old and reach for the new.
Like monkey bars, you have to let go to move forward.

5. Make a move.
Clarity comes from action, not overthinking. You won’t know if it’s a good move until you move.

Timestamps:

[03:30] – Love vs. fear: The A Course in Miracles perspective

[08:50] – Dead Man’s Island vs. Fantasy Island analogy

[19:00] – Identity shifts: How to say no without anger

[28:15] – 3 signs you’re ready for a bigger life

[35:00] – Letting go of limiting beliefs and making your move

Resources & Next Steps:

Money Mastermind – September 2025: Join The Waitlist!

Rita’s Real Talk Facebook Group – Join here

Newsletter: The Art of Aligned Living : Sign Up Here

A Course in Miracles – Book referenced about love and fear

Please be sure to tag me @RitaMarieMendez on Instagram and share this episode with your community to spread the word if you or someone you know has benefited from this episode! I'd love to hear about your experience!

If you love the podcast please click below to rate, review and follow - thank you!
Rate, Review, & Follow on Apple Podcasts

Links/Resources:

Rita's Website: Go to the Website
Contact us here: admin@ritamarieconsulting.com

Your brain isn’t broken—it’s just running old software. This episode will show you how to reprogram it and reclaim your power!

Episode Summary:
In this fierce and fire-filled solo episode, Rita dives deep into the science and spirituality of thoughts, beliefs, and how our subconscious programming is running the show, whether we like it or not. She unpacks the concept of neuroplasticity, the energetic frequency of thoughts, and why your thoughts aren't always true, even though they’re shaping your life. This is the episode for you if you're ready to rewire your inner dialogue, break free from outdated beliefs, and align with the version of you that's ready to receive more abundance, peace, and success.

Top 5 Takeaways:

Your brain is wired for survival, not success
You’ve got to train it with new programming—it won't do it on its own.

Your thoughts aren’t facts
Just because you think it doesn’t make it true. Choose better thoughts.

Energy follows attention
Whatever you focus on gets stronger. Start feeding thoughts that serve your vision.

Your Word is Your Wand
Your language is casting reality into form: ditch “should,” “always,” “never,” and negative “I am” statements.

Repetition creates belief
You become what you repeatedly think, speak, and feel. So, create new loops that support who you’re becoming.

Time Stamps:

[05:10] “What’s my DNA in this?” – self-inquiry to break blame patterns

[07:30] Brain science + neural programming explained through floppy disks and AI

[14:30] Frequency, vibration, and the power of subconscious language

[24:10] “Your word is your wand” – why casual phrases are energetic commands

[33:30] Rita’s story: Losing everything after making $1M—identity vs. capacity

[42:00] Anchoring new beliefs through movement, mantras, and repetition

Resources & Next Steps:

Join the conversation inside my FREE Facebook Community - Rita’s Real Talk: Mindset, Money & Manifestation
This is where we go deeper on these topics, unpack mindset in real-time, and surround ourselves with women who are ready to rise.

Your Word is Your Wand by Florence Scovel Shinn

Mentions of Dr. Joe Dispenza & Dr. Deepak Chopra on brain science and energy

Ho’oponopono practice for energetic clearing

Please be sure to tag me @RitaMarieMendez on Instagram and share this episode with your community to spread the word if you or someone you know has benefited from this episode! I'd love to hear about your experience!

If you love the podcast please click below to rate, review and follow - thank you!
Rate, Review, & Follow on Apple Podcasts

Links/Resources:

Rita's Website: Go to the Website
Contact us here: admin@ritamarieconsulting.com

👉 Ready to move out of the messy middle and into your next level? Join us inside Wealth & Wisdom dm me for an exclusive invite 💫

Episode Summary:

In this powerful episode, Rita unpacks the psychological and spiritual threshold we all face in the “messy middle” the in-between phase of desiring change but feeling frozen in fear. Drawing from real-life examples, nervous system science, and transformational coaching, she shares how to move from fear to aligned action using three life-changing tools.

Whether you're standing in the doorway of your next chapter or circling your vision with doubt, this episode gives you the clarity and courage to take the next step forward—messy middle and all.

Top 5 Takeaways:

Liminality = The Messy Middle
It’s the transitional space between your old self and your new self

Fight, Flight, or Freeze Isn’t Just for Gazelles
Humans stay frozen in survival mode because our perception keeps our nervous system activated long after the threat is gone.

Tool #1: The 90-Second Rule
Allow yourself to feel fear fully for 90 seconds, then ask: “What would I do if I trusted myself right now?”

Tool #2: Future Self Journaling
Write daily as your future self—what you decide, think, and no longer tolerate

Tool #3: Flip Fear with a New Question
When fear masquerades as logic, ask: “What if it works better than I imagined?” and choose faith over fear

Time Stamps:

03:10 The concept of liminality and standing in the threshold

07:20 Nervous system dysregulation and how humans freeze

10:00 Why you can’t “figure it out” from a fear-based mind

12:40 External excuses (economy, market, etc.) and reclaiming agency

21:30 Tool #1 – The 90-Second Rule for emotional release

24:00 Tool #2 – Future Self Journaling + daily prompts

29:10 Tool #3 – Fear masquerading as logic and how to flip it

33:10 How we unconsciously justify playing small

40:30 Reframing “I’m stuck” and rewriting your internal story

Resources & Next Steps:

✨ Wealth & Wisdom Coaching Program Starts May 14th!!
DM @ritamariemendez or email admin@ritamarieconsulting.com to apply or schedule a clarity call

Facebook Community – Real Talk with Rita Marie Mendez

Please be sure to tag me @RitaMarieMendez on Instagram and share this episode with your community to spread the word if you or someone you know has benefited from this episode! I'd love to hear about your experience!

If you love the podcast please click below to rate, review and follow - thank you!
Rate, Review, & Follow on Apple Podcasts

Links/Resources:

Rita's Website: Go to the Website
Contact us here: admin@ritamarieconsulting.com