Episode Summary

In this episode of Owning Pleasure As A Black Woman, we close out our seven types of rest series with the one that sits underneath all the others: spiritual rest.

I'll walk you through why you can have the degree, the title, the house, and the life you prayed for, and still feel numb, disconnected, and like you're just going through the motions.

I also share my own story of chasing a "millionaire in three years" goal that was never really mine, disappearing into hermit mode for three months, and coming back clear on what actually matters to me. If you've been quietly asking yourself "Is this it?", this one is for you.

What You'll Walk Away With

→ Why spiritual rest is about meaning and belonging, not religion, and how you can be faithful and still be spiritually tired

→ The signs of spiritual depletion (numbness, disconnection, achieving big things and feeling almost nothing) and how high achievers lose touch with why they started

→ Two reflection questions to help you see where meaning lives in your life, and where it's gone missing

Ready to go deeper? Start here → javerywellness.com/get-started

Not quite there yet? Download the free 7-Day Self-Care Reset → javerywellness.com/reset

Sponsored By

This episode is brought to you by Javery Integrative Wellness Services. Browse our digital downloads and tools designed to help you do this work between sessions → javerywellness.com/store

More From This Episode

→ Watch on YouTube → youtube.com/@javerywellness

→ Catch the full seven types of rest series → [playlist link]

→ Missed last week? Social Rest: You're Drained by the People You Love Most → [Episode 9 link]

→ Upcoming events → javerywellness.com/events

Connect

→ Instagram · @javerywellness

→ Website · javerywellness.com

Disclaimer

Owning Pleasure As A Black Woman is for educational and informational purposes only. This podcast does not constitute therapy, medical advice, or a therapeutic relationship. If you are struggling or in crisis, please reach out to a licensed mental health professional or contact the 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline by calling or texting 988.

In this episode of Owning Pleasure As A Black Woman, we explore what it means to feel drained by the people you love most, and why that doesn't mean you love them any less.

I'll walk you through social rest: how to tell the difference between relationships that restore you and ones that deplete you, without turning your loved ones into villains.

If you've been showing up for everyone, running on empty, and feeling guilty for needing space, this one is for you.

What You'll Walk Away With

→ Needing space from people you love isn't the opposite of love. Sometimes it's how you protect your ability to keep loving them.

→ A one-week practice: after time with someone, ask yourself, "Do I feel more full or more empty right now?" It's data, not a verdict.

→ Permission to put your restorative people on the calendar, and to shorten the visit, change the setting, or let somebody else plan this year.

What's Next

Download the free 7-Day Self-Care Reset → javerywellness.com/reset

Sponsored By

This episode is brought to you by Javery Integrative Wellness Services.

Browse our digital downloads and tools designed to help you do this work between sessions → javerywellness.com/store

More From This Episode

→ Missed Episode 8, "You're Tired of Performing 'Okay' When You're Not"? Catch it here → [You're Tired of Performing "Okay" When You're Not]

→ Watch on YouTube → youtube.com/@javerywellness

→ Upcoming events → javerywellness.com/events

Connect

→ Instagram · @javerywellness

→ Website · javerywellness.com

Disclaimer

Owning Pleasure As A Black Woman is for educational and informational purposes only. This podcast does not constitute therapy, medical advice, or a therapeutic relationship. If you are struggling or in crisis, please reach out to a licensed mental health professional or contact the 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline by calling or texting 988.

Episode Summary

In this episode of Owning Pleasure As A Black Woman, we explore what it feels like to be the strong one when you just want to be honest.

I'll walk you through why emotional rest might be the type of rest we're most deprived of: the code-switching, the emotional labor nobody counts, and the Strong Black Woman myth that tells us strength is the only feeling we're allowed to show.

I also share a personal moment where I had to tell the people closest to me that being called "strong" was keeping me from getting the support I needed. If you've been answering "I'm fine" when you're not, this one is for you.

What You'll Walk Away With

→ Why performing "okay" is real work, and why it drains you in a way sleep can't fix

→ The difference between emotionally performing and emotionally safe, and why you don't have to be fully authentic everywhere to get emotional rest

→ Small first steps: notice when you edit yourself, give one safe person 10% more truth, and give your feelings somewhere to go (a journal, a voice memo, a walk)

Reflect On This

→ Where in your life are you performing emotion rather than feeling it?

→ Who do you feel safe enough with to stop managing how you come across?

Ready to go deeper? Start here → javerywellness.com/get-started

Sponsored By

This episode is brought to you by Javery Integrative Wellness Services. Browse our digital downloads and tools designed to help you do this work between sessions → javerywellness.com/store

More From This Episode

→ Missed last episode on creative rest? Listen here → [Episode 7 link]

→ Watch on YouTube → youtube.com/@javerywellness

Connect

→ Instagram · @javerywellness

→ Website · javerywellness.com

Disclaimer

Owning Pleasure As A Black Woman is for educational and informational purposes only. This podcast does not constitute therapy, medical advice, or a therapeutic relationship. If you are struggling or in crisis, please reach out to a licensed mental health professional or contact the 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline by calling or texting 988