Most men believe porn addiction is driven by lust, temptation, or a lack of discipline.

But what if that’s not the real problem?

In this episode of No More Desire, I challenge one of the most common—and damaging—assumptions in porn addiction recovery: that the part of you that turns to porn is bad, broken, or sinful.

What I’ve discovered through my own recovery, and through working with men across the world, is this:

Porn addiction often isn’t about pleasure at all. It’s about emotional self-soothing.

There is a part of your mind—what I call the Peacemaker—that is trying to calm your nervous system, reduce stress, and give you relief. When you don’t know how to truly rest, relax, or be present, this part looks for comfort wherever it can find it. For many men, porn becomes that coping mechanism.

In this episode, I break down how porn cravings are often driven by stress, anxiety, emotional overload, and nervous system dysregulation, not sexual desire. I explain why willpower alone fails in porn addiction recovery—and what actually works instead.

You’ll learn how chronic pressure from high achievement, perfectionism, or anxiety quietly fuels relapse… and how the inner war between different parts of your mind keeps the cycle going.

Most importantly, I’ll teach you how to stop fighting yourself—and start leading yourself.

This episode is for men who are tired of white-knuckling sobriety…

Men who keep relapsing despite trying harder…

Men who want lasting porn addiction recovery rooted in mindset, lifestyle, and self-leadership.

If you’ve ever wondered why you turn to porn when you’re stressed, overwhelmed, or exhausted—this conversation will change how you see yourself and your recovery.

You’re not broken. You’re not weak. And the part of you driving porn use doesn’t need to be destroyed—it needs to be retrained.

If you want to go deeper into this work, I invite you to join the No More Desire Brotherhood, where men support each other in real, practical recovery. You can also check out my free resources—including The 8 Keys to Lose Your Desire for Porn and The 10 Tools to Conquer Cravings—at nomoredesire.com.

If this episode helped you, take a moment to follow, rate, and review the podcast. It’s one of the best ways you can help other men find real help for porn addiction recovery.

Let’s get into it.

Link to Blog Article for this Episode

If you’re ready to build the mindset and lifestyle that lead to long-term freedom from porn addiction, visit NoMoreDesire.com and apply for my 1-on-1 Porn Addiction Recovery Coaching Program. You’ll gain the structured tools, accountability, and training you need to transform not only your habits—but your heart.

Grab my Free eBook and Free Workshop for more strategies to overcome porn addiction, rewire your brain, and rebuild your life

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No More Desire

Is it possible to quit porn by changing your beliefs?

Can you overcome porn addiction—not through willpower or positive thinking—but by going deeper into the painful emotions and unconscious beliefs that actually drive the habit?

In this episode, I challenge the popular idea that you can “just believe differently” or manifest your way out of porn addiction. While mindset does matter, most advice about belief change misses a crucial step—and that missing step is the reason so many men keep relapsing despite doing “everything right.”

Porn addiction is not just a behavior problem.
It’s not even just a habit problem.

At its core, porn addiction is driven by unconscious beliefs, emotional conditioning, and nervous system patterns that were formed long before porn ever entered the picture.

In this episode, I walk you through a real-life case study of a client (we’ll call him Joseph) who struggled with porn addiction for nearly 20 years—and is now over three months sober for the first time since he was a child. What changed wasn’t his willpower. It wasn’t positive affirmations. It was the way he learned to work with painful emotions, triggers, and deeply rooted beliefs like shame, defectiveness, fear, and unworthiness.

I also break down the step-by-step belief-release process Joseph used—drawing from Internal Family Systems (IFS), parts work, emotional mindfulness, somatic psychology, and nervous system regulation—to release old beliefs and allow new, healthier beliefs to take root naturally.

We’ll explore the psychology and neuroscience behind why this approach works, including:

• Implicit (unconscious) beliefs and emotional memory
• Why beliefs live in the body, not just the intellect
• Memory reconsolidation and why old beliefs must be activated before they can change
• Prediction error and how self-efficacy is built through lived experience
• Why acceptance—not force—is the key to lasting porn addiction recovery

This episode is for you if:

• You’re trying to quit porn but keep relapsing
• You feel trapped by shame, fear, or emotional overwhelm
• You’ve done therapy, programs, or accountability—but something still feels missing
• You want a deeper, more compassionate, neuroscience-backed approach to recovery

This is not a quick fix. It’s not a magic wand.
But it is a grounded, psychological and neurological path toward real freedom—one that integrates emotional healing, nervous system regulation, and a healthier relationship with yourself.

If you’re ready to stop fighting your mind and start healing it, this episode will change the way you understand recovery.

Link to Blog Article for this episode

If you’re looking for deeper support and real connection in recovery, I’m opening the No More Desire Brotherhood on January 15th. The pre-launch is open right now, and when you join you’ll get free lifetime access to my 4 Pillars of Recovery mini-course, plus exclusive pre-launch bonuses. You can learn more and join here: https://www.nomoredesire.com/prelaunch

Grab my Free eBook and Free Workshop for more strategies to overcome porn addiction, rewire your brain, and rebuild your life.

Support the show

No More Desire

Most men think porn addiction is about lust, lack of discipline, or not wanting freedom badly enough.

It’s not.

In this episode of the No More Desire Podcast, I sit down with Jordan Castille, a coach who works with men navigating pornography addiction, shame, and same-sex attraction, to have a conversation most recovery spaces still avoid.

We talk about how bullying, rejection, and emotional trauma can shape a man’s relationship with porn long before he ever understands what’s happening inside him.

For many men, porn addiction isn’t driven by pleasure — it’s driven by pain, isolation, and the deep belief that “something about me is wrong.”

Jordan shares his personal story of growing up in a conservative faith environment, experiencing same-sex attraction, enduring bullying, and using porn as a way to cope with shame and loneliness. Together, we unpack how trauma wires the nervous system, how sexual desire becomes symbolic, and why trying to “just stop” porn use often backfires.

This episode goes beyond surface-level advice and into the root causes of porn addiction, including identity confusion, emotional neglect, and the unmet need for belonging.

We also explore how healing happens not through suppression, but through understanding, self-leadership, and healthy connection with other men.

If you’ve ever felt broken, abnormal, or alone in your struggle with pornography addiction — this conversation will change how you see yourself.

In this episode, we explore:

• Why porn addiction is often a trauma response, not a moral failure
• How bullying, shame, and rejection shape compulsive porn use
• The connection between trauma and porn addiction in men
• Same-sex attraction, identity, and pornography addiction
• Why sexual triggers are signals, not enemies
• How shame and isolation fuel porn addiction relapse cycles
• Using triggers as trailheads for healing instead of fighting them
• Masculinity, belonging, and emotional healing for men
• How parts work and nervous system regulation support recovery
• A healthier, shame-free framework for overcoming porn addiction

This episode is for men who are tired of white-knuckling, tired of feeling defective, and ready to understand why porn has had such a hold on their lives — and how real, lasting porn addiction recovery actually works.

You’re not weak.

You’re not broken.

And you’re not alone.

Explore more of Jordan's work at: https://www.castillecoaching.com/

Link to Blog Article for this Episode

If you’re ready to build the mindset and lifestyle that lead to long-term freedom from porn addiction, visit NoMoreDesire.com and apply for my 1-on-1 Porn Addiction Recovery Coaching Program. You’ll gain the structured tools, accountability, and training you need to transform not only your habits—but your heart.

Grab my Free eBook and Free Workshop for more strategies to overcome porn addiction, rewire your brain, and rebuild your life

Support the show

No More Desire