Content note: this episode includes discussion of murder, domestic violence, and suicide. Please listen with care.

What do you do with a grief so heavy you can’t even look at it?
For guest, Christen Dingess, the answer was to pour another drink and keep moving.

She was 23 when her roommate and close friend Dawn was murdered in their Florida apartment. Christen was questioned by police and followed by reporters, and she walked away with a guilt she had no words for. So she packed it all into a box, closed the lid, and became the life of the party.

That box stayed shut for 30 years. She kept it shut with wine nights with the other moms, sales conferences, marathons, and a calendar so full there was never a quiet moment to feel anything. From the outside, she looked like she had it all together. On the inside, she was running.

But God never stopped pursuing her.

In this conversation, Christen opens up about the anxiety that finally caught up with her when her kids started leaving home, and the surprising thing she learned in a therapist’s office that made decades of her life suddenly make sense. She talks honestly about what came up once the wine was gone, why she was so sure Dawn’s family blamed her, and what actually happened when she found the courage to reach out to them. (Grab a tissue for that part. I needed one.)

If you’ve ever told yourself, “You don’t know what I’ve been through, I could never stop,” Christen speaks right to you. Her answer is gentle and practical, and it might be the permission you’ve been waiting for.

This is a story about how God can take the very worst thing that ever happened to us and make something good come from it. It’s also a reminder that putting the glass down is the first step. The real healing happens next.

You were made for more, friend. Christen is living proof.

About Christen Dingess:
Christen Dingess was only 23 when her friend was murdered by her boyfriend in the apartment they shared. For more than thirty years, she kept her grief sealed behind glass, convinced she had moved on. Yet the trauma lingered, quietly shaping her relationships, parenting, career, and how she coped with life.

At fifty-four, therapy led her to reach behind the glass and face what she had long avoided. A PTSD diagnosis marked the beginning of true healing, as buried emotions—fear, distrust, survivor’s guilt—finally surfaced. Through sobriety, therapy, and courage, she learned that touching the pain she had stored away was the doorway to freedom and transformation.

Her memoir, Behind the Glass: A Memoir of Trauma, Drinking to Cope, and the Courage to Heal, is out now.

Links:
•Christen’s website and book: https://christendingess.com/
•Behind the Glass on Amazon and Kindle

Leave a message for Susan!

Connect with Susan: Susan@susanlarkincoaching.com
Follow Susan on Instagram: @drinklesswithsusan
Website: Susan Larkin Coaching: https://www.susanlarkincoaching.com

Substack: Drink Less with Susan https://susanlarkin.substack.com/

Want support? Schedule a Alcohol-Freedom Clarity Call: https://calendly.com/susanlarkincoaching/30min

It is strongly recommended that you seek professional advice regarding your health before attempting to take a break from alcohol. The creators, hosts, and producers of the The Drink Less with Susan podcast are not healthcare practitioners and therefore do not give medical, or psychological recommendations nor do they intend for the podcast, any resource or communication on behalf of the podcast or otherwise to be a substitute for such.

It’s 5 p.m. The urge shows up right on schedule. You say no, and then… nothing happens. No one claps. Nobody notices you just did something hard. And your brain, the same one that learned wine was the reward, files it away as a non-event.

What if there was a way to reward not drinking, and start rewiring your brain to seek that reward instead of wine?

This is the first ever tactic episode of Drink Less with Susan, a new bonus episode where Susan hands you one simple tool to put into practice right away. All you need is about two dollars and something you probably already have in a closet.

It may seem a little corny. Susan admits it. But there’s real brain science behind this tactic and a research study out of UConn that helped shape how alcohol treatment rewards progress. Susan walks you through how it works, why it works, and how to create a real treat-yourself reward!

If you’ve ever stood in the kitchen feeling the urge to pour and wished you had something to do with your hands besides grab a glass, this one is for you.

Listen to Episode 8 first. “I Deserve a Drink: Why Wine Was Never the Reward” explains how alcohol hijacks your brain’s reward system. This episode shows you how to use that same system to work in your favor.

When you’ve listened, tell Susan what your reward is going to be. She really wants to know.

Leave a message for Susan!

Connect with Susan: Susan@susanlarkincoaching.com
Follow Susan on Instagram: @drinklesswithsusan
Website: Susan Larkin Coaching: https://www.susanlarkincoaching.com

Substack: Drink Less with Susan https://susanlarkin.substack.com/

Want support? Schedule a Alcohol-Freedom Clarity Call: https://calendly.com/susanlarkincoaching/30min

It is strongly recommended that you seek professional advice regarding your health before attempting to take a break from alcohol. The creators, hosts, and producers of the The Drink Less with Susan podcast are not healthcare practitioners and therefore do not give medical, or psychological recommendations nor do they intend for the podcast, any resource or communication on behalf of the podcast or otherwise to be a substitute for such.

Laundry got a glass. Scrubbing the bathroom got a glass, rubber gloves and all. Dinner got a glass, because dinner happens every. single. night. And Friday? Friday Night was the big one! A bottle and Netflix!

If your drinking looks less like a party and more like a quiet reward for crossing every little finish line in your day, this one is for you.

Susan gets honest about the "I deserve it" glass and where it really came from: a lifelong hustle habit that made rest feel like something she had to earn. Wine became her permission slip to finally sit down."

She walks through what's actually going on in your brain when wine becomes the reward for everything, and why a beautiful sunset or a cup of tea on the deck can start to feel like "meh." Nothing is wrong with you. Your brain is doing exactly what it was built to do.

You'll also meet the inner toddler, the voice that whispers "you worked so hard today, live a little," and hear the surprisingly simple way she answers it without a fight.

Stay to the end for this week's journal prompt, a small exercise that shows you what your treat has really been standing in for.

You do deserve good things. They just don't come in a wine bottle.

Scriptures mentioned: Exodus 20:8-10, Mark 6:31, Matthew 11:28

Resources mentioned:
Free Skip the Sip guide: https://www.susanlarkincoaching.com/skip-the-sip

Leave a message for Susan!

Connect with Susan: Susan@susanlarkincoaching.com
Follow Susan on Instagram: @drinklesswithsusan
Website: Susan Larkin Coaching: https://www.susanlarkincoaching.com

Want support? Schedule a Alcohol-Freedom Clarity Call: https://calendly.com/susanlarkincoaching/30min

It is strongly recommended that you seek professional advice regarding your health before attempting to take a break from alcohol. The creators, hosts, and producers of the The Drink Less with Susan podcast are not healthcare practitioners and therefore do not give medical, or psychological recommendations nor do they intend for the podcast, any resource or communication on behalf of the podcast or otherwise to be a substitute for such.