This week, Coleman has a pressing question for Patrick about a certain song, which leads to an unexpected conversation. Patrick goes on a rant he's done 199 times before, only to be matched by Coleman minutes later. On my toes, I’m gonna be on my knees. Word mean less but it bigger. That’s more of a personal quagmire. Kamala nation and the absence of critical thinking. Kitty kat on the keyboard. It breaks my heart to hear that. Hefty emotion. I can’t believe that is legally allowed to be on screens. You don’t think Sigourney Weaver is a beautiful woman? That’s just my own thing and I have to get over it. I don’t care about being fair to anyone who is married. Pleasure has a cap on it. Fall will fix me because, simply, it’s not the summer. In the mood to get a lot of presents. I’d love to watch some Yu-Gi-Oh. Things are happening at the DIKY Laboratory. Peace! I hope to achieve it.

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This week, a Strand bookstore employee and a T-Mobile store representative maximize their joint slay. Patrick debates Coleman over cover letters (as if they're Coleman's fault) before they reminisce over the many haircuts they've subjected each other to. Sabrina Carpenter has the weapons. I was slated to be bisexual by god (didn’t happen). The Tumblrinas. Mortifying man bun anecdotes. We assumed the hair was going to make our apartment a log cabin. Do you remember the names of our imaginary dogs? You can’t show me that photo again. Guess who got their first mortgage?! The Manic Panic attacked me, my skin, and my self-esteem. Before you spend $250 to bleach your hair, I would see a therapist. Warmth toward bald men. Stop fighting against biology and holding onto an idea! Salads across the boardroom, babe.

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This week, the boys are rallying against the concept of boredom. But first, a reaction gif in a text thread sends a chill up Patrick's spine, while Coleman explores the intention behind sending a Chloë Sevigny reaction photo. A different kind of brain rot. LOL has gone full circle—the kids won’t know this. Bebe Rexha says hello. Boredom isn’t real. We went from twiddling our thumbs to scrolling with them. Not everyone can sparkle upon first meeting. I have chugged drinks to get out of a conversation. You have to have the nosy person hookup in your life. Weather is the thread that binds us all. Has boredom factored into the dissolution of your relationships? Scientific and mathematical precision does not allow the beauty of uncertainty. Sleep deprivation is the most terrifying torture tactic. A story of true terror caps the episode. This is it, you guys: we’re goners!

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After a week off to rest (and because the audio was corrupted by rainfall—new lost episode!), the boys are back and have so much catching up to do. Coleman returns from the sternum of America, while Patrick peeks from beneath the delicate lace of a two-week shroud of depression. We were bore from water. You’re not doing anything to me or my family. She’s spiritually ageless. I am a monkey clanging symbols together. How do you lose your validity as an artist? What am I if not baby? Everything is Colemantic. Anything that I want to make happen can happen...as long as it happens now. Identity crises. Katy Perry is a painted clown. When was the last time you finished a book, Patrick? I had to stay mum. This is the most illiterate thing I’ve ever said. You are probably going to sound like the asshole if you have a fucking opinion about every single thing. The loss of a Dakota Johnson rave casts a pall on the episode. #NoLenaNoLoot.

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This week, the boys have spent too much money to play Six Beverages, Six Women. Patrick and Coleman have each bought three different drinks they've never tried to taste them, analyze them, and find out who the hell they are and what their deal would be if they were people. These are women with stories, backgrounds, dreams, aspirations, failures, secrets, chronic illnesses, desires, and ages. Coleman riles up the Swifties. Patrick dreams of the day when he will post on Instagram. Thank you for calling me a twink. A heat dome is when the sun tears it so hard. If a woman can’t have a glass of wine, society has collapsed. Do you think she wears a thong? It conjures the underworld. Two gay men coming up with a distraught, broken girl’s name—could take hours. The thing about Martina is she IS in a fight with her roommate. Reminiscing on when Patrick lived in a closet, off the books. Fans of the show will be familiar. She’s living a little too fast. Find a way to like it and keep drinking it until it’s finished. I never want to stop feeling this way.

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This week, the boys are getting into the senitmental second half of the New York Times' 36 Questions That Lead to Love. A most treasured memory makes Coleman cry. Patrick finds resilience in the difficulty. Unequivocal darkness is shared, healed, and laughed at. Who am I, fuckin' Oscar Wilde? He still laughs at the jokes the same way he’s always laughed at them. You need to experience more shame. I would be fucking and sucking all over this great nation. Beauty and the belch. Coleman tells an extremely vulnerable story from his early twenties and hopes you will not judge him. An improvised punchline that is so good it’s almost scary. An entire section where the boys gas each other up in the most kind, emotional, and sweet way (Question 22, babe). Did I ever tell you about the time I ran through a screen door? Twisted torture tactics of psychological and emotional manipulation. I wish I had someone with whom I could share Gossip Girl for the first time.

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This week, the boys are partaking in an exercise they've wanted to do forever: the New York Times' 36 Questions That Lead to Love. Patrick exalts a soft summer breeze caresses the skin, while Coleman glorifies the soft-boiled egg. Gifts are given in advance. Mutual vulnerability fosters closeness. What would Charli XCX order for dinner? I’m having the best time! Didn’t I Kill You?…at the GLAAD awards. A phone call is actually a very bizarre way of communicating with another human. A perfect day should be attainable. To ask a gay person this is so rude. I don’t feel married to the idea of living to 90. Having a hunch. We appear to be the same person.

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This week, the boys tackle a Pride episode, but Patrick and Coleman both find themselves suplexed by confusion and visions of past Junes. Material hits the cutting room floor. There's drama at TSA and brown liquid in a Yankee Candle jar. I saw a bird with a worm in its mouth. The ghosts of Fire Island have never been louder. Where did we land on kink at Pride? I’ve never been a person who is like, “Yay this." Pride (Trademark) comes down to aesthetics. I’m not a big flag guy. My Pride was watching illegal uploads of the American 'Queer as Folk' when I was 10. Piss in your shoe after the parade. How do I say this? Posting "pride is a fight" from the club toilets. Mama, what fight? A dramatic reading of Pride emails from an underwear brand. Identity can be a turnoff. We don’t need another ode to queer nightlife! Psychic diabetes. I don’t wanna be boots with trade.

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