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Holli LaMarque of Fortitude Defense shares a clear path for people who don’t see themselves as fighters to become hard targets: stand tall, make eye contact, use your voice, and have a plan if kindness fails.

We unpack her Embolden–Equip–Empower framework and why each stage matters. Embolden builds courage and presence so you stop advertising vulnerability. Equip layers in high-percentage techniques that hold up under pressure wrist releases, wall escapes, palm and knee strikes, positional control. Empower teaches you to take charge when escape isn’t possible: mount, side control, back takes, and chokes that work for smaller bodies. We compare sport jiu-jitsu to street realities, highlighting what transfers (timing, breathing, composure, leverage) and what to simplify (no fancy flying arm bars in a gas station).

Holli tackles tough myths head-on: you do not need to “get fit first,” and a single workshop won’t make you safe. She redesigned Fortitude around a Lifer model one investment for Levels 1–3 with unlimited refreshers so skills and mindset get real reps. We talk kids’ self-defense, spotting grooming and domestic violence red flags, and why trauma-aware coaching matters. You’ll hear practical drills to raise your presence eye contact, confident greetings, posture and why ground skills are a must for women and smaller folks. Holli also shares her own game (mount pressure, guillotines, Ezekiel Chokes, triangles) and how competing and cross-training sharpen her teaching.

If you care about personal safety, confidence under pressure, and the blend of mindset plus mechanics, this conversation gives you a roadmap. Follow Fortitude Defense on Instagram, check classes at fortitudedefense.com, and connect with us on the Caffeinated Jiu-Jitsu Instagram. If this helped, subscribe, leave a review, and share it with someone who needs a confident plan.

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A late night drive after class can turn into a spiral: replayed rounds, imagined judgments, and the quiet pressure to be great at jiu-jitsu. We decided to confront that pressure head on and rebuild a healthier way to train one that trades validation for longevity and brings back the simple joy of learning. With a renewed plan for 2026 and a mix of solo reflections and real conversations across the community, we’re focusing on depth, consistency, and the kind of honesty that keeps people on the mat.

We unpack where pressure hides: comparisons that happen even when you try to avoid them, highlight reels on social that sell the illusion of straight-line progress, and unspoken academy expectations that make you feel like you should win certain rounds or never ask basic questions. We look at how identity can twist a rough night into a referendum on who you are, and how that fear narrows your game until play disappears. The antidote isn’t to stop caring; it’s to redefine what “good” means. Think awareness over dominance, sustainability over spikes, and honest reps over curated outcomes.

You’ll hear practical ways to train lighter and improve faster: set a single intention per session, protect curiosity, and zoom out beyond a bad day or week. We talk leg locks, inversion experiments, and why giving yourself permission to be “bad” for a while is often the fastest path to real skill. We also touch on culture why humility wins, how positive leadership makes progress feel possible at any age, and why patience is baked into the belt system for a reason. If you’re competing this year, you’ll get a balanced mindset for pursuing medals without letting pressure steal your sleep.

Subscribe, share this with a teammate who needs it, and leave a review with the single intention you’ll try next class.

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A lot of schools say, “iron sharpens iron.” Few build an entire culture around it. We sat down with Professor Caleb Holland, owner and head coach of Iron Wolf Academy in Braselton, GA, to unpack how a humble school without a sign on the door grew to a packed mat by focusing on faith-driven values, clear standards, and relentless community. Caleb shares the origin of the Iron Wolf name, why the vibe is designed not accidental and the three rules that guide everything: take care of your partner, do your best, and have fun.

Caleb’s path to black belt winds through tang so do and judo, into Brazilian jiu-jitsu, a humbling early tournament, and a knee injury right after earning black belt. The turning point? Returning at the Charleston Open, losing on points, and still realizing he belonged at black belt. He credits influence from judo coach Max Andrews and Atos black belt Kristian Woodmansee, plus years of cross-training that shaped his lens on modern leg locks, takedowns, and the balance between Gi and no-Gi.

We go deep on coaching: moving from technique lists to concept-first teaching, why short specific rounds sharpen competitive scrambles, and how early exposure to heel hooks actually makes rooms safer. Caleb explains why stand-up matters judo and wrestling included and how a women-led program created space for safer learning and real confidence. We also talk culture at scale: hygiene and standards, clean music and language, the role of faith, and why referrals beat ads when your room delivers consistent results and care.

If you’re a practitioner, you’ll get practical insights on building a game that fits your body and goals. If you’re a coach or owner, you’ll hear hard-won lessons on structure, growth, and guarding the vibe. Hit play, then tell us: what’s the one standard your gym should never compromise?

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