In this episode of Awkward Etiquette with Kiki Astor, we tackle one of the most uncomfortable—and misunderstood—topics in modern society: class. Not money. Not income. Not net worth. Class.

From ancient Rome and Greece to modern Europe and North America, this episode explores how class has historically functioned as a system of behavior, duty, values, and conduct—not merely consumption. We trace how class evolved through feudal societies, the rise of the bourgeoisie, Victorian morality, and America's enduring myth of classlessness, revealing why pretending class no longer exists has made people socially confused, status-obsessed, and deeply anxious.

We unpack the critical difference between wealth vs class, income vs status, and why high earnings don't automatically translate into elegance, credibility, or social ease. Drawing on ideas like cultural capital, invisible manners, and long-term thinking, this episode explains what actually signals class today—and what merely signals insecurity.

You'll learn:

• The real historical meaning of class (and how we lost the plot)
• Why class markers have little to do with logos or luxury spending
• Who actually gatekeeps class, and why gatekeeping exists at all
• The 3 Generation rulle: How class mobility really works—and why so many families rise quickly only to fall within a few generations
• Why restraint, privacy, and institutional fluency matter more than visibility
• How pretending class is "dead" creates fragile elites and chaotic aspirants

Finally, we explore why class still matters—not as superiority, but as stewardship, social literacy, and stability—and how to cultivate genuine elegance regardless of your starting point.

This episode is for anyone fascinated by old money vs new money, social codes, etiquette, cultural power, and the quiet rules that still shape opportunity, trust, and belonging in modern life.

Why does exclusion hurt so much—and why has every functioning society depended on it?

In this episode of Awkward Etiquette with Kiki Astor, Kiki dismantles the modern fantasy that "everyone belongs" and reveals exclusion as one of the oldest, most stable organizing principles of social life. Drawing on history, psychology, etiquette, and elite social systems—from Mrs. Astor's 400 to Palm Beach clubs, London blackballing, and members-only cultures—this episode explains how gates, silence, and unspoken rules actually create coherence, trust, and power.

You'll learn:

• Why exclusion activates the brain like physical pain—and why we misinterpret it as personal failure

• The difference between rejection and structural exclusion (and why confusing them causes social anxiety)

• How old money, elite institutions, and private clubs use etiquette as a filtering system, not a performance

• How the cast of Members Only Palm Beach is anything but real high society

• Why the most secure people don't chase inclusion, over-explain, or audition for belonging

• How to read closed doors as information instead of insults

• How to stop unraveling after being left out—and start choosing rooms that fit your nervous system, values, and identity

This is a deep dive into status, class, power dynamics, etiquette, social hierarchy, exclusion psychology, old money culture, and modern insecurity—delivered with dry wit, historical rigor, and Auntie Kiki's signature clarity.

If you're tired of performative belonging, exhausted by social climbing, curious about how elite systems actually work, or craving a more grounded, dignified relationship to status and love—this episode will change how you move through the world.

For the final episode of the season of Awkward Etiquette Old Money and New Manners, Auntie Kiki invites you into the most intimate setting of all: the floor by the Christmas tree, wrapping gifts imperfectly and talking you down from the holiday panic spiral. This conversational season finale explores why old money traditions never revolve around a perfect Christmas and why elegance, confidence, and connection matter far more than flawless décor or curated aesthetics.

In this holiday etiquette episode, Kiki breaks down the modern obsession with getting Christmas "right," from symmetrical trees and pristine tables to carefully chosen outfits that are technically appropriate but completely forgettable. She explains why old money has always rejected perfection, not out of rebellion, but out of wisdom. Perfection is fragile, exhausting, and one spilled drink away from collapse, while confidence thrives in imperfection.

Listeners are guided through old money holiday style, including why wearing the wrong thing to a Christmas party is often the most elegant choice. From hunting jackets over velvet dresses to pearls paired with dog walking boots, these outfit choices create narrative, signal inherited confidence, and eliminate the anxiety of trying to impress. Old money fashion, Kiki reminds us, is about story over spectacle and presence over performance.

The episode also dives into old money Christmas parties and entertaining etiquette, where chaos is not a failure but a feature. Real candles, questionable wiring, overcrowded guest lists, and unpredictable moments are what transform gatherings into lasting memories. These imperfect holiday parties work because they allow people to relax, laugh, and connect without fear of things falling apart.

Gift giving etiquette takes center stage as well, with Kiki unpacking why old money never suffers from gift anxiety. Instead of branded, over explained presents, old money gifts reflect continuity and life in progress. Think homemade jam in reused jars, books no one asked for, mysterious brass objects, and stockings filled with oranges, loose sweets, and forgotten pocket treasures. These gifts aren't curated. They are contextual, personal, and quietly confident.

This season finale of Awkward Etiquette is a warm, witty reminder that true elegance during the holidays comes from resilience, shared stories, and emotional ease. Old money Christmas isn't about perfection. It's about connection, memory, and allowing imperfection to do its most important work.

Vampires are back—but in 2025, they aren't sleeping in coffins. They're chairing the board, running the estate, and freezing you out of the conversation with a polite smile.

In this episode of Awkward Etiquette, Kiki Astor dissects the ultimate social archetype: The Old Money Villain. Drawing from her novel Scarlet Fever and the terrifying "Sangren" family, Kiki explores why we are culturally obsessed with wealthy monsters (think Succession, The White Lotus, and The Perfect Couple) and why the scariest people aren't loud—they're just insulated.

If you've ever felt frozen out by high society, intimidated by a boss's silence, or exhausted by the "Eat the Rich" discourse, this episode is your survival guide.

Tune in to learn:

• The Anatomy of the Monster: Why Old Money villains don't use force, but "continuity," to maintain power.
• The "Eat the Rich" Trap: Why shame doesn't work on the ultra-wealthy, and how to replace outrage with structural literacy.
• Etiquette as Risk Management: Why exclusion isn't usually about snobbery—it's about equilibrium (and how to make yourself "legible" to the elite).
• The Economics of Emotion: How to use "The Power of the Pause" and manage your emotional labor like a currency.
• The Outsider's Mistake: Why trying to mimic the "Ice Queen" backfires, and the difference between powerful silence and petty contempt.
• BONUS SEGMENT: Dressing the Part. How to adopt the Old Money Villain aesthetic—using clothing as armor without looking like a costume.

Whether you are navigating a difficult dinner party or just want to understand the psychology behind the "Quiet Luxury" villain, this episode will teach you how to borrow their composure without losing your soul.

Mentioned in this Episode:

• Scarlet Fever by Kiki Astor
• The psychology of Succession & The White Lotus
• Navigating toxic social hierarchies
• Strategic silence and emotional boundaries

Subscribe to Awkward Etiquette for your weekly dose of old money secrets and new world manners.

Step into the holidays with old-money elegance, unbothered poise, and a velvet-lined sense of humor in this special episode of Awkward Etiquette with Kiki Astor. In this Holiday Social Survival Guide, Kiki shares the discreet, never-spoken-aloud strategies that generational families use to glide through December gracefully—even when surrounded by chaos, questions, poorly behaved relatives, and peppermint bark they did not ask for.

This episode covers 30 old-money-coded micro-manners, including:
• Holiday dressing secrets (two uniforms, heritage prints, effortless grooming)
• How to look polished even when you're unraveling internally
• Family boundary scripts that deflect intrusive questions with elegance
• Hosting shortcuts that create the illusion of serenity without actually cleaning
• Old-money entertaining tricks (lighting, cocktails, atmosphere over effort)
• Emotional etiquette, including the Sacred Exit, the 20-Minute Rule, and choosing your "holiday alter ego"
• Crisis fixes for bad hair, bad moods, and bad conversations

Perfect for listeners searching for holiday etiquette tips, hosting hacks, family gathering survival guides, old money lifestyle advice, quiet luxury holiday ideas, and anyone who wants to enter the season looking chic, sounding calm, and preserving their dignity at all costs.

If you want the holidays to feel easier, prettier, and significantly more glamorous—this is your essential December listening.

In this jewel-box episode of Awkward Etiquette: Old Money & New Manners, old money and etiquette expert and author of the Virginia foxhunting dark old money gothic novel Scarlet Fever Kiki Astor takes you on a richly layered tour of Old Money Green—the color that has shaped centuries of taste, architecture, interiors, jewelry, fashion, and even social behavior. From the deep, secretive gloss of Charleston Green, rumored to be a begrudging compromise from the post-Civil War era, to the storied Kelly Green of The Greenbrier, to Elsie de Wolfe's iconic soft greens in her legendary drawing rooms, this episode is a masterclass in how different greens evolved into markers of heritage, refinement, and generational confidence.

We explore emeralds, jade, malachite, peridot, how tartan, tweed, and loden green became synonymous with country estates and equestrian culture, and why specific greens appear again and again in heritage interiors, private clubs, fox-hunting culture, English country houses, Newport "cottages," and storied American porches.

But Kiki doesn't stop at aesthetics. She dives deep into the etiquette and emotional intelligence behind the color: how to handle the "green-eyed monster" with grace, how envy and jealousy show up in high-society dynamics, how old-money families neutralize competitiveness with ritual, language, and poise, and how to cultivate a quiet confidence that reads as "old money" no matter your background or bank account.

Expect witty observations, social-historical details, and plenty of nouveau pauvre self-deprecation as Kiki breaks down:

• The history and meaning of Charleston Green, Savannah Green, and Oxidized Copper Green on classical American homes

• Why loden coats, tartan skirts, and forest-to-hunter greens signal insider equestrian and countryside heritage

• The psychology behind jealousy etiquette and how to manage envy in friendships, relationships, and competitive social circles

• The role of green in royal fashion, prep school uniforms, Ivy League design, and private club interiors

• How to incorporate "old money green" into your own wardrobe, home, jewelry box, and daily manners

Packed with old money aesthetics, social-skills wisdom, historical context, and chic etiquette insights, this episode is a treasure trove for anyone obsessed with heritage design, timeless style, and becoming the most elegant version of themselves—without losing their sense of humor.

Pour yourself an iced mint tea, sit beneath something vaguely chinoiserie, and let's talk green.