When should a loved one move into memory care — and when should you start that conversation? Many families wait until there's a hospitalization, wandering, or caregiver burnout, and by then it's often too late. In this episode, we sit down with Risa Jester, Executive Director at Revere La Jolla, to talk about early intervention, the signs of dementia to watch for, how to navigate the financial and emotional side of the decision, and what to look for when choosing a memory care community.

Whether you're just starting to notice changes in a parent or already in the thick of decision-making, this conversation will help you understand your options before you're in an emergency.

Connect With Aging Parent Network Not sure who you need to call or where to begin? Aging Parent Network can help connect you with the right professional for your family's circumstances.

📞 858-727-9333

📧 info@agingparentnetwork.com

If you have aging parents or are a caregiver, this episode gives you the tools to have an important conversation before a scam happens — not after. 🔔 Subscribe for more conversations on navigating aging, caregiving, and family decisions.

What do you do when your dad wants to move to senior living but your mom isn't ready — and every conversation turns into a battle?

In this episode, Jay D'Alessandro shares how he and his sister navigated the hardest conversation families face: talking to aging parents about leaving their home. Jay's dad had been pushing to move for three years. His mom kept saying no. The breakthrough didn't come from a PowerPoint or a financial argument — it came from a simple mindset shift: stop convincing, start asking.

Jay explains how casual visits to senior communities over lunch (with no agenda) changed his mom's entire perspective, how thinking about "days instead of years" brought his family closer together, and why the planning process itself became one of the most meaningful chapters of his relationship with his parents.

If you're worried about a parent's safety, their home maintenance, memory loss, or just don't know how to start the conversation — this episode will give you a gentler, more effective path forward.

In this episode:

• Why pushing your parent to move backfires — and what works instead
• How to normalize senior living visits without pressure
• A simple mindset shift: think in days, not years
• What it costs to wait too long (CCRCs, timing, and care costs)
• Healthcare directives, power of attorney, and getting finances on the table
• Preparing the family home for a future sale
• The VA Aid & Attendance benefit — could your parent qualify?
• Why the journey itself can bring your family closer together

Connect With Aging Parent Network

Not sure who you need to call or where to begin? Aging Parent Network can help connect you with the right professional for your family's circumstances.

📞 858-727-9333

📧 info@agingparentnetwork.com

If you have aging parents or are a caregiver, this episode gives you the tools to have an important conversation before a scam happens — not after.

🔔 Subscribe for more conversations on navigating aging, caregiving, and family decisions.

How do you talk to your parents about getting older — without making it weird? In Episode 20, we sit down with 30-year-old stand-up comedian Danny Dunn to explore the funny, awkward, and deeply real moments of watching your parents age. Danny's parents are only 68, but the signs are already showing — from a dad who refuses to get glasses and carries a magnifying glass instead, to a mom who still whispers the word "lesbian." Behind the jokes, though, lies a genuine question we all face: are they going to be okay, and am I? We cover why humor is the ultimate "Trojan horse" for difficult conversations, how Danny turned childhood bullying and ADHD into a survival tool through comedy, and what happens when the perfectionism your parents instilled in you starts cracking as they show their own humanity. We also dive deep into the host's personal story of losing both parents — one to cancer, one to dementia — and the urgent case for recording conversations with your parents while you still can. If you've been putting off the hard talks about wills, trusts, healthcare directives, or even just "what do you want your life to look like as you get older," this episode is your permission slip to start. Because it's not about the end — it's about everything in between, and making sure your parents live their fullest, most dignified life while they can. In this episode: Why humor breaks the ice on topics nobody wants to touch Growing up thinking your parents know everything (and the slow realization they don't) The perfectionism trap: resenting your parents in your 20s, appreciating them by your 30s Recording conversations with your parents — and why the "annoying" ones are the ones you'll miss most "I wouldn't let you die alone": a father's love on a cruise ship at midnight How to approach resistant parents about end-of-life planning (without getting shut down) The magnifying glass, re-election for parents, and other stand-up bits born from real life Why processing grief before it happens doesn't work the way you think About our guest: Danny Dunn is a stand-up comedian performing across the country. He headlines Zanies in Chicago on November 1st and opens for comedian Rory Scovel (whose Netflix special Show Must Go On covers similar themes). Follow him on Instagram, TikTok, Facebook, and YouTube @dannydunnismyboyfriend. Connect With Aging Parent Network Not sure who you need to call or where to begin? Aging Parent Network can help connect you with the right professional for your family's circumstances. 📞 858-727-9333 📧 info@agingparentnetwork.com If you have aging parents or are a caregiver, this episode gives you the tools to have an important conversation before a scam happens — not after. 🔔 Subscribe for more conversations on navigating aging, caregiving, and family decisions.

Title: What to Do When You're Worried About Your Parent's Care in a Senior Living Facility | Ep. 19

Description:

When something feels off with your parent's care in an assisted living, memory care, or skilled nursing facility — and you don't know who to call — there's a free resource you may not know exists: an ombudsman.

In this episode, Tracy Sherman, a volunteer ombudsman with 10 years of experience in San Diego County, explains what ombudsmen do, how they advocate for residents' rights, and when families should reach out. We cover the most common complaints in senior living, how to research facilities before moving in, how ombudsmen mediate family conflicts, real stories of residents she's helped, and why this program desperately needs more volunteers.

If your parent is in a licensed senior living community — or soon will be — this episode will help you understand your rights, the facility's obligations, and the advocate who's already on your side.

In this episode:

• What an ombudsman is and how the program started
• The training and commitment required to become one
• How ombudsmen handle complaints — from minor to serious
• What to look for when researching and visiting facilities
• Why you should know your ombudsman before you need them
• A real story of fighting to get a resident back home
• How to volunteer and give back

Connect With Aging Parent Network

Not sure who you need to call or where to begin? Aging Parent Network can help connect you with the right professional for your family's circumstances.

📞 858-727-9333

📧 info@agingparentnetwork.com

If you have aging parents or are a caregiver, this episode gives you the tools to have an important conversation before a scam happens — not after.

🔔 Subscribe for more conversations on navigating aging, caregiving, and family decisions.

Scams don't just happen to gullible people. They happen to smart people — by design. Toby is 82. She's a former journalist, a leader in her friend group, and one of the sharpest people her host knows. And she still got scammed out of $4,500 in a single afternoon. It started with a fake Apple security alert on her computer. An hour later, she was on the phone with someone claiming to be the FBI, being told her account had been linked to child pornography. By 3 PM, she was standing in Home Depot buying gift cards — while the scammer stayed on the line the entire time. What saved her from losing far more was her son Walt, who was on vacation in Montana when his phone started blowing up with credit card alerts. He had quietly set up transaction notifications on every one of his parents' cards — and that $4,500 loss could have been $40,000 without those alerts. In this episode: * Toby walks through the scam in real time — how the emotional manipulation worked, the moments she could have been saved, and why she's sharing her story publicly * Walt breaks down the financial safety measures he put in place — credit card alerts, debit card warnings, and the conversation he had with his parents to get access * The "tell" of every scam: Pretend → Problem → Pressure → Payment * The 24-hour rule: the single most powerful protection against scams * Why you should never use a debit card for online transactions * How AI is making IRS phishing scams look authentic * What to do the moment you realize you've been scammed — and why reporting it matters even when it feels embarrassing If you have aging parents, this episode is your playbook for the conversation you need to have before the phone rings. Connect With Aging Parent Network Not sure who you need to call or where to begin? Aging Parent Network can help connect you with the right professional for your family's circumstances. 📞 858-727-9333 📧 info@agingparentnetwork.com If you have aging parents or are a caregiver, this episode gives you the tools to have an important conversation before a scam happens — not after. 🔔 Subscribe for more conversations on navigating aging, caregiving, and family decisions. 0:00 - Scams Happen to Smart People 2:12 - It Started With a Fake Apple Alert 4:00 - "The FBI" Gets Involved 7:03 - How the Scammer Became Her "Savior" 8:53 - Buying Gift Cards at Home Depot 11:18 - "Something Is Way Wrong Here" 14:10 - Toby Hangs Up and Calls Her Family 16:06 - How Much Was Actually Lost 16:29 - Walt Gets the First Alert 19:48 - "I Thought the Worst Had Happened to My Mom" 20:19 - Walt Starts Shutting Down Every Card 22:06 - How Walt Set Up Credit Card Alerts 24:53 - How the Credit Card Companies Responded 29:55 - Every Scam Has a Tell: Pretend → Problem → Pressure → Payment 31:24 - How AI Is Making Scams Harder to Spot 33:23 - How to Start the Financial Conversation With Your Parents 38:14 - New Precautions: IRS Phishing & a Family Game Plan 46:10 - What to Do the Moment You Realize You've Been Scammed 47:39 - Why Toby Decided to Share Her Story 49:14 - The 24-Hour Rule: The Single Best Protection 52:03 - Why You Should Never Use a Debit Card

Protecting Seniors from Scams: Steps and Stories

Every 4 seconds, someone is being scammed in the US. In this episode of The Aging Parent Podcast, host Valerie Upham sits down again with IT consultant and scam education expert Matt Carl to break down exactly how scammers target older adults — and what families can do to stop them.

We open with a real story: a man had his investment account open on his computer when scammers called pretending to be his fraud department. They convinced him to grant remote access, triggered a fake "Windows update" to freeze his screen, and wired $250,000 out of his account — untraceable and gone.

From there, Matt walks through what you should do in the first 10 minutes after being scammed, how to protect passwords with two-factor authentication, why embarrassment keeps victims silent, and how AI is supercharging scams with cloned voices and fake videos. You'll also learn the 3-second email rule, the four-part anatomy of every scam (Pretend, Problem, Pressure, Payment), the difference between phishing, fishing, and smishing, the hidden risks of smart home devices, the latest cloud storage scams making the rounds, and what NOT to do after you've been scammed.

If you're caring for an aging parent, this conversation is essential. Awareness is the only defense that works — share this with someone you love.

Connect With Today's Guest

Matt Karl

sdpcmedics@gmail.com

Connect With Aging Parent Network

Not sure who you need to call or where to begin? Aging Parent Network can help connect you with the right professional for your family's circumstances.

📞 858-727-9333

📧 info@agingparentnetwork.com

If you have aging parents or are a caregiver, this episode gives you the tools to have an important conversation before a scam happens — not after.

🔔 Subscribe for more conversations on navigating aging, caregiving, and family decisions.

0:00 The $250,000 Scam (Cold Open)

0:42 Introduction & Welcome Back

1:36 The First 10 Minutes After Being Scammed

3:59 The $250,000 Investment Account Scam Story

6:53 Protecting Passwords & Two-Factor Authentication

8:46 Overcoming Embarrassment & Talking About It

15:01 How AI Is Supercharging Scams

18:13 The 3-Second Email Rule

21:15 The Anatomy of a Scam: Pretend, Problem, Pressure, Payment

27:25 Phishing, Vishing & Smishing Explained

30:30 Smart Devices & Family Safety Risks

32:58 Evite Scams & the Latest Trends

34:55 Password Managers & Passkeys

38:05 What NOT to Do After Being Scammed

AI Scams Are Stealing $120 BILLION a Year — How to Protect Your Aging Parents Description: AI is fueling a massive rise in scams targeting seniors — and families are losing more money than ever before, an estimated $120 billion a year.

In this episode of The Aging Parent Podcast, host sits down with fraud prevention expert Matt Carl to break down exactly how scammers operate and how you can protect your loved ones.

We cover:

* Why scammers are targeting seniors specifically, and why 80% of victims are over 60

* How AI voice cloning is used to impersonate grandchildren and family members

* The psychology behind scam calls, texts, and computer pop-ups — and why "doing nothing" is often the safest response

* Red flags in phone calls, QR codes, gift card requests, and text messages

* How banks are stepping in to flag suspicious transactions

* Practical steps families can take today: call blocking, bank alerts, the Do Not Call Registry, and having the "it's okay to hang up" conversation with your parents

If you have aging parents or are a caregiver, this episode gives you the tools to have an important conversation before a scam happens — not after.

Connect With Today's Guest

Matt Karl

sdpcmedics@gmail.com

Connect With Aging Parent Network

Not sure who you need to call or where to begin? Aging Parent Network can help connect you with the right professional for your family's circumstances.

📞 858-727-9333

📧 info@agingparentnetwork.com

If you're helping an aging parent sort through decades of belongings or plan a move, don't wait until it becomes overwhelming. Contact Aging Parent Network at 858-727-9333 to talk through your circumstances and get connected with the right professional. And if this episode could help another family, share it with them, subscribe to the Aging Parent Podcast, and follow for more conversations about helping aging parents and their families make informed decisions.

🔔 Subscribe for more conversations on navigating aging, caregiving, and family decisions.

Episode 15 | Finding Hidden Treasures in Clutter: What Professional Organizers Discover When Downsizing a Home

Downsizing an aging parent's home isn't just about sorting boxes—it's about navigating decades of memories, family dynamics, and the emotional weight tied to everyday belongings.

In Episode 15 of the Aging Parent Podcast, Valerie Upham sits down with Sherri Gengel of Be Organizing to talk about what really happens when families face the "what do we do with all of this stuff?" question.

Sherri shares how her team works elbow-to-elbow with seniors to sort through decades of belongings—from rock collections and china sets to old paperwork—while helping them decide what to keep based on what truly brings them joy, not just what they think they should keep.

One of the most fascinating parts of the conversation is how professional organizers use tools like color-coded stickers to help multiple siblings claim items without conflict, and how they navigate family dynamics when relationships are strained.

Because when someone downsizes, they're not just getting rid of things.

They're deciding what memories are worth carrying forward.

In This Conversation, We Cover

• What a professional home organizer actually does (and doesn't do)
• How to approach a parent about downsizing without triggering resistance
• Why space planning should come before deciding what to keep
• How to help someone decide between an item and the memory behind it
• What to do with inherited furniture, photographs, and sentimental collections
• How family dynamics and sibling relationships affect the organizing process
• Why storage units are rarely the right long-term solution
• The "80/20 rule" for closets and how to apply it
• What paperwork you actually need to keep (and for how long)
• How estate sales, donations, and online marketplaces fit into the process
• The difference between an organizer and a traditional senior move manager
• Why starting early—even before a parent is ready—makes the process easier

Sherri's advice throughout the episode is simple but powerful: meet people where they are, focus on the story behind the item rather than the item itself, and remember that the goal isn't to get rid of everything—it's to help someone move forward with intention.

About the Aging Parent Podcast

The Aging Parent Podcast features conversations with professionals who work with older adults and their families. Each episode focuses on practical information families can use when facing decisions involving aging parents, senior living, caregiving, estate planning, downsizing, healthcare, housing, and other major life transitions. Our goal is to give families information they can understand and use—ideally before a crisis forces the decision.

Connect With Today's Guest Sherri Gengel

Be Organizing Co-Founder

📧 sherry@beeorganized.com

https://beeorganized.com/pages/san-diego

Connect With Aging Parent Network Not sure who you need to call or where to begin?

Aging Parent Network can help connect you with the right professional for your family's circumstances.

📞 858-727-9333

📱@beeorganized.co

📧 info@agingparentnetwork.com

If you're helping an aging parent sort through decades of belongings or plan a move, don't wait until it becomes overwhelming. Contact Aging Parent Network at 858-727-9333 to talk through your circumstances and get connected with the right professional.

And if this episode could help another family, share it with them, subscribe to the Aging Parent Podcast, and follow for more conversations about helping aging parents and their families make informed decisions.