Why Your Self-Care Isn't Working: The Overflow Method for Busy Professional Women

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Why Your Self-Care Isn't Working: The Overflow Method for Busy Professional Women

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📥 Get Your Free Guide: Download my 35 Micro Self-Care Practices for Busy Women Guide at SelfCareAlchemist.com/selfcareguide. It’s simple, sustainable practices you can use today.This conversation explores how to follow your inner compass, deconstruct limiting belief systems, and turn the tap on so your cup is constantly overflowing. SummaryIn this soul-stirring episode, I sat down with spiritual teacher and intuitive mentor Ashmita Arora to explore the critical difference between fulfillment and abundance—and why chasing the wrong one leads straight to burnout. This conversation really opened my eyes because we’ve been taught that abundance (the nice car, the big house, the designer goods) equals happiness, but Ashmita helped me see that true fulfillment comes from those flow state moments when time disappears and you’re just completely present. What really resonated with me was her metaphor about being full and someone offering you dessert—you don’t need it, but you could enjoy it. That’s abundance. And if you eat it just to have it when you’re already full, you end up on the treadmill the next week trying to burn it off, stressed about something that never truly satisfied you. About AshmitaAshmita Arora is a Spiritual Teacher and Transformation Guide who helps people move through life’s most pivotal transitions with courage and presence. Whether it’s navigating endings, grief, burnout, or profound spiritual awakenings, she reveals the unseen architecture beneath these experiences creating gateways to growth. Her talks blend deep spiritual insight with practical clarity, provoking audiences to leave inspired and empowered.Timestamps0:00 Introduction1:57 Fulfillment vs. Abundance Explained5:33 Why We’re Conditioned to Chase Abundance7:22 Flow State and Avoiding Burnout11:04 Following Your Inner Compass12:49 Transitioning from Fear-Based Decisions15:46 Piscean vs. Aquarian Era23:30 Deconstructing Limiting Belief Systems27:02 The Overflow Cup Metaphor for Self-Care31:47 How to Practice Fulfillment Today33:25 Permission to Say No and Protect Your Energy36:13 Breaking Free from Cultural Expectations38:36 Ashmita’s Programs OverviewKey Highlights & TakeawaysFulfillment vs. Abundance: True fulfillment is when you’re in flow—time disappears, you’re not thinking about anything else, and you’re doing something that doesn’t drain you because the passion comes from such a divine, expansive place. Abundance is the external stuff we’ve assigned meaning to, and when we chase it thinking it will fulfill us, we blur the lines and end up stressed about losing it. The Inner Compass Practice: Ashmita shared the most powerful tool—when making decisions, ask yourself: Does this make me feel expansive or contracted? Is it coming from fear, guilt, or obligation? If it’s rooted in any of those three, don’t do it. You can’t put black food coloring into something and expect to get white. The Body Is Conscious: Our bodies have their own consciousness and send us messages. Ashmita experienced mysterious, violent illnesses for years that doctors couldn’t diagnose, always conveniently timed after big events so they didn’t disrupt her work. Her body was desperately trying to tell her something, but she didn’t listen until everything crumbled. The Tap Metaphor: This one hit me hard—imagine a tap with water flowing constantly. That’s source; that’s when you’re in flow. If you put a cup under the tap and just hold it there, it overflows constantly so you can give from that overflow. But if you fill your cup, turn the tap off, and keep giving from that one cup without refilling, you will burn out. You cannot give from an empty cup.The Aquarian Era: We’re moving from the Piscean era (all about control, boxes, external validation, building outside ourselves) into the Aquarian era (going internal, self-discovery, understanding who we are at a soul level). Those of us who felt like outsiders or didn’t fit into society’s boxes? Our time has come. Reframe Your Obligations: Most of the burnout happens in our heads. Why do we feel like we have to do everything at 100%? Some days it can be sandwiches for dinner, and that’s fine. Look at your responsibilities from a blessed perspective—these kids you prayed for, this job you wanted so badly—and if you can’t change the outside, you can always change how you perceive it. The Power of No: When you say no to protect your energy, you’re not just helping yourself—you’re giving the other person an opportunity for spiritual growth. If it bothers them that you cancel to take a day for yourself, they need to find out why that bothers them. By following your own path, you’re actually serving their higher self even if they don’t understand it in this realm. Stop Giving from Obligation: When you put effort into something nobody asked you to do and then get upset they don’t appreciate it, that’s on you. You did that for ...

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