A great date can feel amazing, but attachment style determines what happens next. In this episode, Carla Romo breaks down why you should never "match their energy," how anxious and avoidant attachment styles create the fall-fast/pull-away cycle, and how to break out of those patterns. In the TACO segment, Carla Romo explores whether you're having sex to feel loved or to feel good, and how that choice shapes intimacy and connection.

What You'll Learn

• Why you shouldn't "match their energy" — they should match yours

• How anxious attachment creates chasing and overthinking

• How avoidant attachment creates distance and mixed signals

• The push-pull cycle and how to break it

• How attachment styles shape emotional connection

• Why "falling fast" isn't always chemistry — sometimes it's anxiety

• How to communicate needs early and clearly

• The difference between sex for intimacy vs. sex for validation

• How to build a more secure dating pattern

• Why you're not stuck in your attachment style

Work with me:

1:1 Coaching program

Ask Me Anything - 30 Min Session

Dating Profile Makeover - 30 Min Session

Proven Dating Courses:

Swipe Match Spark: The Ultimate Dating App Guide

No Filter: The Sex Guide Every Dater Needs

Book:

Contagious Love: Break Free From Codependency for Damn Good

Tiktok: @iamcarlaromo

Instagram: @iamcarlaromo

Youtube: @iamcarlaromo

FREEBIE: 20 Best First and Second Date Questions

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Sound Bites

• "You want them to match your energy."

• "Believe that shit straight."

• "You are not asking for too much."

Chapters

00:00 — Understanding Attachment Styles in Relationships

06:23 — TURNED OFF: Match Their Energy? No.

12:29 — Why You Fall Fast & They Pull Away

28:58 — TACO: Sex for Love vs. Sex for Pleasure

Disclaimer: Carla Turned On content has been made available for informational, entertainment, and educational purposes only. Carla Turned On is distinctly different from coaching, counseling, psychotherapy, or psychoanalysis and does not deal with the diagnosis or treatment of emotional problems. Carla Turned On does not constitute medical consultation or treatment.