Why You Don’t Believe in Yourself (And How to Fix It) | Dr. Shadé Zahrai
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Self-doubt holds more people back than lack of skill or intelligence.
In this episode, Dr. Gabrielle Lyon sits down with Dr. Shadé Zahrai to explore the science of confidence, self-trust, and peak performance. They break down why confidence comes after action, how self-image shapes success, and the four psychological drivers that determine whether you thrive or stay stuck.
You will learn how body language influences perception, why high performers plan for failure, how perfectionism leads to burnout, and the subtle communication habits that undermine credibility. Most importantly, you will discover how to build what Dr. Zahrai calls Big Trust so you can back yourself before you feel ready.
If you struggle with overthinking, imposter thoughts, or feeling capable but not fully confident, this conversation will give you practical tools to change how you show up.
CHAPTERS00:00 Confidence science: feeling vs appearing
00:51 The opposite of self-doubt and why confidence comes after action
01:53 Self-trust before confidence
03:03 Nonverbal confidence cues: posture, eye contact, smile, pace
07:30 Body language feedback loop: posture and recall
09:26 Shadé’s PhD on self-doubt under pressure
12:22 What makes people successful: self-image
12:30 Self-image blueprint and why change does not stick
14:29 The Four A’s: Acceptance, Agency, Autonomy, Adaptability
20:26 The self-awareness gap and changing personality traits
22:30 Expectation bias and the scar experiment
25:54 Self-doubt types: signal vs verdict
28:30 Visibility, influence, and the people around you
31:16 Which traits are easiest to change
35:56 Why capable people still stay stuck
40:25 Michael Phelps and visualizing failure recovery
42:30 Stop rumination: stimulus control for worry
47:45 Self-improvement vs perfectionism vs burnout
56:53 The 4 inner deceivers: Judge, Protector, Neglecter, Ringmaster
1:11:22 Peak performance and Big Trust
1:19:19 Communication habits that kill credibility
1:24:18 Stop over-apologizing and reframe emotion
1:29:47 Daily habits to build Big Trust and audit your circle
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Find Dr. Dr. Shadé Zahrai at:
- IG: https://www.instagram.com/shadezahrai/
- YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/shadezahrai