Imagine being face to face with someone threatening you. It’s not just a casual argument, but a life-or-death situation. Chris Voss, a former FBI negotiator, teaches us that in these cases, you should never split the difference. Compromise isn’t always the answer, especially when the stakes are high.

But what does this mean in everyday life? We often think compromise is the solution, but Voss tells us that settling in the middle can mean losing. The key is tactical empathy: deeply understanding the other person, even when you disagree. It’s about describing their emotions without judgment, letting them know you're listening.

Voss shares how, in a tense situation, simply using his name diffused an aggressive encounter. He was no longer a stranger but Chris, a person. That small gesture completely changed the dynamic, because when people feel understood, they lower their defenses.

This technique isn’t just for hostage negotiators. It works in every area of life, from work to personal relationships. Instead of reacting defensively, try reflecting the other person’s emotions. You don’t have to agree, but making the other person feel heard can transform the interaction.

So, next time you face a conflict, don’t rush to compromise. Use tactical empathy to build a deeper connection and find a solution that truly respects both sides. Even in the toughest situations, remember: we’re all human.