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WTF is on my Mind?!

WTF is on my Mind?!

Di: Mark Vicente
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Author, Speaker, Whistleblower and award-winning Director Mark Vicente was behind the sleeper hit “What The Bleep Do We Know?!” Several books have been written about the film’s remarkable grassroots marketing campaign, which led to its unprecedented success.

Mark was born in Johannesburg, South Africa in 1965. Taking his first photograph at age four, he quickly discovered his passion for being behind the camera. After attending film and drama school in South Africa, he began working his way up the ranks of the camera department, from Assistant to Operator to Cinematographer. His first big break came as Director of Photography on the musical “SARAFINA,” starring Whoopi Goldberg. In 1992, he set his sights on Hollywood and relocated to Los Angeles to shoot his first studio picture for Disney; “FATHERHOOD,” starring Patrick Swayze and Halle Berry. At the age of 26, he became one of the youngest cinematographers to shoot a big-budget studio picture.

Over the next few decades, he went on to shoot an additional 14 feature films and numerous documentaries, music videos and commercials. Mark soon found there were in him, untold stories he desperately wanted to express as a Director. He was driven by the conviction that tales of greatness, nobility and introspection could be exciting and financially successful.

Perhaps because of the very obvious race and class iniquities in South Africa, he found himself propelled to question certain fundamental assumptions at a very young age. Beliefs about human behavior, cosmology, religion, existentialism and mysticism. Along the way, he stumbled into a few situations where leaders with malignant pathologies (masquerading as saintly philosophers) spoke the talk of self-improvement but did untold damage to their followers... and him.

Looking back, he can now say he has been in at least two cults. His last foray into personal growth and his defection from NXIVM was chronicled in the HBO series “The Vow”. Mark and a few plucky whistleblowers exposed the criminal activities of the organization, resulting in multiple arrests and indictments. He doesn’t consider himself a cult expert, but by his own admission, “I’m an expert in being screwed over, waking up, and knowing how to spot them.” He’s got a pretty salty approach to most things and is fascinated by the myriad patterns in the human psychodynamic that create the best and the worst in civilization.

Join Mark as he unpacks a whole range of topics to do with: Psychology, Consciousness, Morality, Narcissistic Abuse, Spirituality, Cults, Propaganda, Science, Filmmaking, and Philosophy.You never quite know what you’re going to get, as it really does depend on… WTF is on his mind?!

© 2026 WTF is on my Mind?!
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  • Bottling Up Rage: Why People Pleasing Ends Badly w/ Nick Pollard
    Oct 18 2026

    I found Nick Pollard, known online as 'The People Displeaser,' through his Instagram reels, and three days later we were recording this conversation. Nick is a coach and recovering people pleaser who survived a brutal childhood, three divorces, and an addiction that nearly killed him. He came out the other side with ideas that a lot of people find hard to hear.

    We talk about how people-pleasing quietly turns into resentment, why he calls it "little bottles of rage," and why the explosion almost always lands on someone you love. We get into why he doesn't buy the word "empath," what he saw after walking out of rehab and straight onto its staff, and why he thinks a lot of coaches need to stay in their lane. I also push him on the question I keep running into with my own audience: where does taking responsibility for your life end, and where does victim blaming begin?

    Nick also shares why Narcissist's Playbook hit him so hard, and what it showed him about his own past relationships.

    Nick's Instagram: @thepeopledispleaser
    Book: I Hope You Hate This, out January 26, 2027. Pre-order at www.ihopeyouhatethis.com

    Narcissist's Playbook Screenings
    Washington, D.C.: Free screening, Sunday, October 25, Sylvan Theater, National Mall
    Want to join the D.C. street team? Email outreach@narcissistsplaybook.com
    Cape Town, South Africa: Late November. Details coming soon.
    More U.S. screenings in December, with Europe and Australia planned for early 2027.
    Rent the film: www.NarcissistsPlaybook.com

    Patreon
    Behind-the-scenes footage from my trip back to Albany, New York, plus the conversations I don't have publicly: www.patreon.com/markvicente

    Support the show

    The views and opinions expressed by guests on WTF is on my Mind?! do not necessarily reflect the official policy or position of the podcast or Mark Vicente. Any content provided by guests are of their opinion and are not intended to malign any religion, group, club, organization, business individual, anyone or anything.

    Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/MarkVicente
    Website: www.markvicente.com
    Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@markvicente7
    Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/markvicente/
    X: https://x.com/markvicente
    TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@mark_vicente
    Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/markvicente/

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    1 ora e 15 min
  • Failing the Test Is Passing the Test: The Moment I Chose My Wife Over NXIVM
    Oct 4 2026

    This one is personal.

    When I was waking up from NXIVM, Raniere and the people around him were turning on my wife Bonnie and trying to destroy our marriage. At one point she asked me where she stood in all of it. I checked in with myself, deeply, and I gave her my answer. The cult saw that answer as weakness.

    Last week in New York, someone asked me about that moment on a podcast, and it brought back something I had completely forgotten. In the 90s I read a book called "The Nine Faces of Christ" by Eugene Whitworth. It moved me so much that I wanted to make a film of it. Near the end, the main character faces a final test in an Egyptian mystery school: to move on, he has to give up the woman he loves. What he chooses, and what happens next, has stayed with me for decades. I just didn't realize how closely it mirrored my own choice until now.

    In this episode I talk about:
    - The moment Bonnie asked me where my loyalty was
    - How NXIVM turned my answer into a story about me having no backbone
    - The story of "The Nine Faces of Christ" and why it hit me so hard
    - Why sometimes the only way to pass the test is to fail it
    - Going back to Albany, and what I noticed about how I used to feel there
    - Choosing love, life and presence over ideology

    NARCISSIST'S PLAYBOOK IN WASHINGTON, D.C.
    We're screening the film on October 25th. Details and sign up: here: https://narcissistsplaybook.uscreen.io/pages/filmscreenings

    MY ALBANY VLOG
    I walked around the old stomping grounds and recorded my thoughts. It's up on Patreon: www.patreon.com/markvicente

    Stay curious.

    Support the show

    The views and opinions expressed by guests on WTF is on my Mind?! do not necessarily reflect the official policy or position of the podcast or Mark Vicente. Any content provided by guests are of their opinion and are not intended to malign any religion, group, club, organization, business individual, anyone or anything.

    Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/MarkVicente
    Website: www.markvicente.com
    Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@markvicente7
    Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/markvicente/
    X: https://x.com/markvicente
    TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@mark_vicente
    Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/markvicente/

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    15 min
  • The Algorithm Wants us to Hate
    Sep 20 2026

    You're sure you know who the enemy is. You've seen the evidence. You've read the comments. But what if the fight itself is the product?

    In NXIVM, Raniere kept us busy fighting each other so none of us looked up at what he was doing. I'm watching the same pattern play out on a massive scale, and most people are too inflamed to notice. So I want to ask you a question I think very few people are asking right now: who benefits when you hate the other side?

    And if the answer makes you uncomfortable, what do you actually do about it? I have a thought on the antidote. I'd love to hear yours in the comments.

    🎟 Nashville screening of Narcissist's Playbook with Evan Rachel Wood, Sept 22: https://www.belcourt.org/events/rental-screening-narcissists-playbook/
    🎬 Rent the film anytime: http://www.narcissistsplaybook.com
    📩 Know a journalist or outlet who should cover the film? outreach@narcissistsplaybook.com
    🎧 My earlier episode on narcissistic triangulation: https://youtu.be/jdlrfn7V22Q
    🎧 My interview with A Little Bit Culty:
    Part 1: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/a-little-bit-culty/id1553334816?i=1000789536099
    Part 2: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/a-little-bit-culty/id1553334816?i=1000789541029

    Stay curious.

    Support the show

    The views and opinions expressed on WTF is on my Mind?! do not necessarily reflect the official policy or position of the podcast or Mark Vicente. Any content provided by guests are of their opinion and are not intended to malign any religion, group, club, organization, business individual, anyone or anything.

    Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/MarkVicente
    Website: www.markvicente.com
    Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@markvicente7
    Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/markvicente/
    X: https://x.com/markvicente
    TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@mark_vicente
    Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/markvicente/

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    24 min
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