Episode 234: What Actually Happens When an Avoidant Realises They’ve Lost YouIn this episode of Unfck Your Relationships, I break down what actually happens when an avoidant realises they’ve lost you and why this moment is so often misunderstood and romanticised.Avoidants don’t experience breakups the same way anxious or secure people do. Instead of immediate grief, they often feel relief as the fear of closeness shuts off. It’s only later when distractions stop working that the loss truly hits.I unpack the avoidant timeline, from the relief phase to the delayed grief, why breadcrumbing often follows, and why missing you does not automatically mean growth or emotional availability.This episode isn’t about getting them back. It’s about understanding the dynamic so you can stop waiting, stop self-abandoning, and start choosing secure love without needing someone else to realise your worth.WORK WITH MICHELLE:Join THE CONNECTED WOMAN, a course for the woman who wants to go from anxious & self-abandoning in relationships to secure, confident and unf*ckwithable: https://michellepanning.com/the-connected-womanSign up for THE EXPERIENCE, an exclusive 12-month mentorship experience where you go all in on YOU (aka, you get direct access to me as a mentor, access to every offer I run over your year, and MORE): https://michellepanning.com/the-experienceCONNECT WITH MICHELLE:Instagram: http://www.instagram.com/michellepanningWebsite: http://www.michellepanning.com

In this episode of Unf*ck Your Relationship, I break down why attraction has very little to do with how you look and everything to do with how you move, respond, and relate to yourself.

The most magnetic women aren’t performing for attention… they’re grounded, regulated, and deeply self-trusting.

I’m sharing the 11 habits that instantly make you more attractive not in a “pick me” way, but in a secure, embodied, unf*ckwithable way that completely changes how you’re treated in relationships.

Here’s what I unpack in this episode:

• Why chasing kills attraction and what to do instead

• How emotional regulation makes you magnetic

• The power of silence, boundaries, and standards

• Why honesty early builds connection

• How staying connected to yourself changes love

WORK WITH MICHELLE:

Join THE CONNECTED WOMAN, a course for the woman who wants to go from anxious & self-abandoning in relationships to secure, confident and unf*ckwithable: https://michellepanning.com/the-connected-woman

Sign up for THE EXPERIENCE, an exclusive 12-month mentorship experience where you go all in on YOU (aka, you get direct access to me as a mentor, access to every offer I run over your year, and MORE): https://michellepanning.com/the-experience

Sign up for THE AWAKENING RETREATS now before they sell out. These aren't just retreats. These are where we turn your inner chaos into GOLD: https://michellepanning.com/awakening

CONNECT WITH MICHELLE:

Instagram: http://www.instagram.com/michellepanning

Website: http://www.michellepanning.com

In this episode of Unf*ck Your Relationship, I break down the 26 lessons that quietly reshaped how I live, love, work, and stay devoted to myself.

This isn’t about motivation or becoming someone new it’s about the standards, discipline, and self trust required to actually create a different year.

These lessons span self trust, shadow work, relationships, embodiment, and devotion to the long game and they all anchor back to one truth a life that looks good but feels wrong is no longer an option.

Here’s what I unpack in this episode:

• Why discipline is self respect and how consistency changes your nervous system more than intensity ever will.

• How to stop abandoning yourself in relationships by watching behaviour, not chasing clarity.

• Why devotion to yourself not willpower is what actually creates lasting change.

This episode is an invitation to stop preparing for your life and start staying with yourself even when it’s uncomfortable.

That’s how 2026 becomes different.

WORK WITH MICHELLE:

Join THE CONNECTED WOMAN, a course for the woman who wants to go from anxious & self-abandoning in relationships to secure, confident and unfckwithable: https://michellepanning.com/the-connected-woman

Sign up for THE EXPERIENCE, an exclusive 12-month mentorship experience where you go all in on YOU (aka, you get direct access to me as a mentor, access to every offer I run over your year, and MORE): https://michellepanning.com/the-experience

Sign up for THE AWAKENING RETREATS now before they sell out. These aren't just retreats. These are where we turn your inner chaos into GOLD: https://michellepanning.com/awakening

CONNECT WITH MICHELLE:

Instagram: http://www.instagram.com/michellepanning

Website: http://www.michellepanning.com(http://www.michellepanning.com/)

In this final episode of 2025 Unf*ck Your Relationships, I dive into why you can’t rush into goals, manifestations, or a “new version” of yourself without first allowing this year to fully complete.

Before we talk about what’s next, we need to talk about what’s done because unfinished emotional cycles will follow you into the new year if you don’t consciously close them.

Here’s what I unpack in this episode:

• Why feeling tired doesn’t mean you failed and how fatigue often signals nervous system integration.

• Why trying to become “her” keeps you disconnected, and how listening to your body, boredom, and resistance gives clearer direction.

• Why closure is an inside job and how to stop bleeding energy into the past without needing apologies or one last conversation.

This episode is an invitation to let 2025 land, release what’s complete, and create the space required for what comes next.

WORK WITH MICHELLE:

Join THE CONNECTED WOMAN, a course for the woman who wants to go from anxious & self-abandoning in relationships to secure, confident and unfckwithable: https://michellepanning.com/the-connected-woman

Sign up for THE EXPERIENCE, an exclusive 12-month mentorship experience where you go all in on YOU (aka, you get direct access to me as a mentor, access to every offer I run over your year, and MORE): https://michellepanning.com/the-experience

Sign up for THE AWAKENING RETREATS now before they sell out. These aren't just retreats. These are where we turn your inner chaos into GOLD: https://michellepanning.com/awakening

CONNECT WITH MICHELLE:Instagram: http://www.instagram.com/michellepanning

Website: http://www.michellepanning.com(http://www.michellepanning.com/)

EP 230: You Haven’t Lost Your Spark If you’ve been moving through life on autopilot, feeling flat, numb, or disconnected from yourself this episode is for you.

Not because something is “wrong” with you… but because your nervous system is done carrying what was never meant to be permanent. Burnout isn’t a personality flaw.

Losing your spark isn’t a failure. And this season isn’t here to punish you it’s here to wake you up. In this episode of Unf*ck Your Relationships, I break down why so many women feel like they’ve lost their spark and why trying to “get back to the old you” is actually keeping you stuck.

This isn’t about romanticising your life or forcing gratitude when you’re depleted. This is mindset + embodiment + shadow work the holy trinity.

I walk you through the five shifts that actually bring your spark back every time by restoring self-trust, reclaiming your energy, and reconnecting you to your aliveness.

Here’s a few things I unpack in this episode:

Why Autopilot Is a Nervous System Response Burnout vs Self-Abandonment Why Productivity Is Killing Your Aliveness Pleasure, Play & Erotic Energy (Without Making It Sexual) You don’t need to find your spark. You need to stop abandoning yourself. And this episode shows you exactly how.

WORK WITH MICHELLE: Join THE CONNECTED WOMAN, a course for the woman who wants to go from anxious & self-abandoning in relationships to secure, confident and unf*ckwithable: https://michellepanning.com/the-connected-woman

Sign up for THE EXPERIENCE, an exclusive 12-month mentorship experience where you go all in on YOU (aka, you get direct access to me as a mentor, access to every offer I run over your year, and MORE): https://michellepanning.com/the-experience

Sign up for THE AWAKENING RETREATS now before they sell out. These aren't just retreats. These are where we turn your inner chaos into GOLD: https://michellepanning.com/awakening

CONNECT WITH MICHELLE:Instagram: http://www.instagram.com/michellepanning

Website: http://www.michellepanning.com

In this episode of Unf*ck Your Relationships, we’re building the blueprint for your most grounded, self-led, and successful year ever. Not because the calendar magically fixes your life - but because you decide to show up as the woman who no longer drags old chaos into her new chapter.

2026 is a blank slate. A reset. A clean energetic line in the sand. And the version of you who thrives next year is built from identity, habits, emotional maturity, and standards… not “new year, new me” delusion.

I walk you through the exact ways to anchor into self-belief, detox 2025 without spiralling into shame, rebuild your habits, upgrade your mindset, call in healthy love, and become the woman whose life reflects her standards - not just her Pinterest board.

Here’s what I unpack in this episode:

Claiming 2026 as Your Fresh Start

Identity - Evidence

Reflecting on 2025 Like a Grown Woman

Habits That Match Your Goals

Your 2026 Vision

Intentionality Over Performance

Expanding Your Comfort Zone

The 1% Rule

Big Dreams, Small Actions

Protecting Your Energy

Mindset Mastery

Your Environment & Community

Defining Success on Your Terms

Progress Over Perfection

Celebrating Every Win

Reinvesting in Yourself

Raising Your Standards in Love

Breaking the Anxious/Avoidant Loop

Shadow Work on Your Standards

Embodying Your Worth

Choosing Intimacy Over Chaos

Becoming the Woman Who Lives Her Standards

WORK WITH MICHELLE:

Join THE CONNECTED WOMAN, a course for the woman who wants to go from anxious & self-abandoning in relationships to secure, confident and unf*ckwithable: https://michellepanning.com/the-connected-woman

Sign up for THE EXPERIENCE, an exclusive 12-month mentorship experience where you go all in on YOU (aka, you get direct access to me as a mentor, access to every offer I run over your year, and MORE): https://michellepanning.com/the-experience

Sign up for THE AWAKENING RETREATS now before they sell out. These aren't just retreats. These are where we turn your inner chaos into GOLD: https://michellepanning.com/awakening

CONNECT WITH MICHELLE:

Instagram: http://www.instagram.com/michellepanning

Website: http://www.michellepanning.com

In this episode of Unfck Your Relationships*, we’re stepping into the most misunderstood and most misused part of feminine energy: the dark feminine. Not the TikTok version. Not the “manipulate him back” bullshit. The real dark feminine. The part of you that is bold, grounded, self-protective, deeply self-respecting, and absolutely unwilling to keep abandoning herself for crumbs.

Most women are living 90% in their light feminine… the sweet, nurturing, soft version of themselves and then wonder why they feel drained, overlooked, over-giving, mothering grown men, and acting like the emotional support animal of their friendships. The truth?

Your light feminine didn’t fail you. You were simply never taught how to access the other half of your power.

In this episode, I break down how to awaken the dark feminine in a way that is empowering, not chaotic… liberating, not manipulative… and how she becomes the version of you that will literally save your fucking life.

Here’s what I dive into:

Light vs Dark Feminine

Dark Feminine ≠ Manipulation

Being Willing to Be the Villain

Raising Your Standards

Feminine Assertiveness

Mystery + Moving in Silence

Self-Devotion — Your Level-Up Era

Integration — How to Activate This Today

This episode is your permission slip to enter the era where you don’t just hope for better — you enforce it. Your dark feminine isn’t dangerous. She’s divine. And she’s been waiting for you.

WORK WITH MICHELLE:

Join THE CONNECTED WOMAN, a course for the woman who wants to go from anxious & self-abandoning in relationships to secure, confident and unf*ckwithable: https://michellepanning.com/the-connected-woman

Sign up for THE EXPERIENCE, an exclusive 12-month mentorship experience where you go all in on YOU (aka, you get direct access to me as a mentor, access to every offer I run over your year, and MORE): https://michellepanning.com/the-experience

Sign up for THE AWAKENING RETREATS now before they sell out. These aren't just retreats. These are where we turn your inner chaos into GOLD: https://michellepanning.com/awakening

CONNECT WITH MICHELLE:

Instagram: http://www.instagram.com/michellepanning

Website: http://www.michellepanning.com

In this episode of Unfck Your Relationships, we’re diving into the identity level shifts required to level up so quickly it almost feels wrong. The truth? You’re not stuck because of timing, luck, or the men you date. You’re stuck because your nervous system is still wired for chaos, crumbs, and chasing and you keep choosing what’s familiar over what’s actually good for you.

I break down the real reasons you keep looping in the same patterns and how to step into the version of you who doesn’t tolerate inconsistency, confusion, or emotional breadcrumbs. This is where your “Secure Her” identity gets built not from goals, but from standards, self-respect, and micro-moments of alignment.

Here’s what I unpack in this episode:

Why You’re Stuck It’s not the universe or bad luck. It’s the identity you’re operating from and the parts of you (anxious girl, avoidant girl, cool girl, little girl) running the show.

Defining Your Next-Level Self Who is “Secure Her”? What does she tolerate? What becomes a hard no? And if the world was watching you 24/7… would you be proud?

Meeting the Version of You Who Already Lives There The you with standards, follow-through, nourishment, rest, boundaries, and self-respect. What does she do that you’re not doing? What has she stopped tolerating?

The Brutal Gap Check Where your life doesn’t match your mouth: who you text, who you sleep with, your friendships, your food, your sleep, and how you talk to yourself. Your results = your standards in action.

Closing the Gap With Micro-Standards One small high-standard action per day. Don’t text him back. Go to bed earlier. Speak up. Walk away from what isn’t a match. Let your nervous system learn that it’s safe to be the new you.

Expecting Backlash + Resistance Old friends will notice. Men who benefitted from your low standards will push back. Your inner child will panic because familiar feels safe. This is GOOD.

Reframing the Discomfort “I’m not losing people I’m losing patterns.” “I’m not being dramatic I’m raising my standards.” “It’s not scary it’s new.”

At the core, leveling up this fast isn’t about becoming someone new. It’s about returning to the version of you who was always there the one with discernment, self-trust, and standards that feel like a full-body yes.

WORK WITH MICHELLE:

Join THE CONNECTED WOMAN, a course for the woman who wants to go from anxious & self-abandoning in relationships to secure, confident and unf*ckwithable: https://michellepanning.com/the-connected-woman

Sign up for THE EXPERIENCE, an exclusive 12-month mentorship experience where you go all in on YOU (aka, you get direct access to me as a mentor, access to every offer I run over your year, and MORE): https://michellepanning.com/the-experience

Sign up for THE AWAKENING RETREATS now before they sell out. These aren't just retreats. These are where we turn your inner chaos into GOLD: https://michellepanning.com/awakening

CONNECT WITH MICHELLE:

Instagram: http://www.instagram.com/michellepanning

Website: http://www.michellepanning.com