In this episode of Modern Mystics, Stephanie and Kasia sit down with Ryan John Phillips for a raw and deeply human conversation about identity, trauma, resilience, and what it really means to rebuild a life.

Ryan is a former Western Hockey League player whose early experiences in elite competitive sports were marked by physical and verbal abuse, hazing, and fear. What began as a love for the game slowly turned into anxiety, loss of self-worth, and substance use as a way to cope. Long after leaving hockey, the psychological impact surfaced in vivid ways, shaping his mental health journey well into adulthood.

Ryan shares how the collapse of his hockey career led him down a very different path, including incarceration in a U.S. federal prison, separation from his daughter, and the complete dismantling of the identity he had built around success and status. From there, the conversation traces his unexpected transformation, from prison to Southeast Asia, where his life shifted toward humanitarian work, advocacy, and spiritual growth.

We talk openly about:

• Abuse and silence in competitive sports culture

• The long-term mental health effects of trauma and concussions

• Identity loss after sports and success

• Incarceration, accountability, and rebuilding from nothing

• Guilt, redemption, and learning to live with integrity

• Advocacy, storytelling, and using lived experience to help others

Ryan’s story is not about glorifying the past, but about honesty, responsibility, and choosing a different future. Today, he is an international motivational speaker, humanitarian, and mental health advocate who continues to raise awareness, reduce stigma, and encourage people — especially men and young athletes; to speak up and ask for help.

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