If people know something is wrong, why does it so rarely get said out loud? And when someone finally does say it publicly, are they holding people accountable, or just fuelling gossip?

In this episode of The Side Room, Saf, Zoheb and Zoheb's wife get into the conversations many people in the Bengali and wider South Asian community are already having privately, but often avoid having publicly. Using Affa and her content as the jumping-off point, they unpack the growing role of public call-outs, anonymous warnings, social media accountability and what happens when communities keep protecting the same people despite repeated complaints.

The conversation starts with a bigger question. Why do some figures in the community stay on a pedestal no matter how many concerns are raised about them? Why do people whisper in private, but hesitate to speak plainly in public? And when someone does step into that gap and starts naming patterns, posting screenshots and calling things out, why are they so quickly dismissed as messy, dramatic or just “gossiping”?

Saf and Zoheb discuss whether Affa is simply saying out loud what others already think, and why that makes people uncomfortable. They get into the tension between receipts and rumours, public warnings and pile-ons, and whether social media has become one of the only places where ordinary people feel they can raise concerns when they believe nobody else will.

A major part of the episode looks at influencer accountability, especially when creators promote products or services to a trusting audience. If people in the community lose money, feel misled, or believe harm has been caused, what responsibility does the influencer carry? Is “just scroll on” or “block them” really enough, or does having a public platform come with a duty of care? That leads into a wider discussion around consumer harm, complaints being brushed aside, and the cycle of outrage, silence and business-as-usual that so often follows.

The episode also looks at why community call-outs land so differently when religion, reputation, familiarity and social ties are involved. When does protecting people become enabling them? When does staying quiet become part of the problem? And what does real accountability actually look like if we want communities to be safer, fairer and more honest?

This is not a takedown episode. It’s a conversation about community standards, influencer culture, public criticism, trust, silence and accountability. It’s also an attempt to ask a harder question: if everybody seems to know, why does nobody want to be the one to say it?

As always, we’d love to know what you think.

Disclaimer: This episode discusses public online conversations, opinions and allegations. It does not present unverified claims as established fact. The views expressed are those of the hosts and are part of a wider discussion around accountability, community behaviour and influencer culture.

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Why is talking about your salary still so awkward? Why can we happily discuss what we do for a living, but suddenly get cagey when someone asks what we actually earn?

This week, Saf and Zoheb talk about money, financial literacy and all the things they were never really taught growing up. From first jobs and spending your first paycheque to flashy cars, designer clothes, property, debt and the pressure to look successful, they get into how our relationship with money changes as we get older.

They also ask what financial freedom actually means. Is it earning six figures? Owning a big house? Driving the car you always wanted? Or is it simply having enough to live the life you want without constantly worrying about the next bill?

For a lot of South Asian and immigrant families, money has never just been about the individual. There can be an expectation to support parents, siblings and relatives, send money back home, and prioritise family before yourself. Saf and Zoheb talk about what their parents’ generation carried financially, whether those expectations affected the lives they were able to build in Britain, and whether that responsibility now passes down to their children.

They also question how much financial education they actually received. “Don’t waste your money” is useful advice, but it doesn’t teach you how mortgages work, whether financing something makes sense, how to buy your first property, how to save properly, or how to make decisions that future-you will be grateful for. Much of that, they realised, had to be learnt along the way.

There’s also the weirdness around salaries, keeping your earnings private, comparison, envy and why telling your friends exactly what you make can feel more personal than almost anything else.

And underneath all of it is a bigger question:

Security? Status? Freedom? Family? Enjoying yourself now? Preparing for later?

Saf and Zoheb look at the choices they’ve made, the things they’d do differently, spending money on the people they love while they still can, and what they want the next generation to understand much earlier than they did.

Plus first jobs, questionable teenage fashion choices, financial mistakes, and wtf is Robert?

The Side Room is a British conversational podcast about culture, identity, faith, family, community and the conversations people usually have when nobody else is listening.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Saf and Zoheb start with the fallout around Ed Sheeran and Macklemore, but the conversation quickly gets wider.

What happens when speaking publicly could cost you work, money or your audience? Does that change if you’re already wealthy or have millions of people listening to you?

They look at Ed Sheeran’s response, Macklemore’s position, and other examples of celebrities who’ve spoken publicly and faced consequences, from Melissa Barrera and Gary Lineker to Mark Ruffalo and Taylor Swift.

There’s also a blind ranking of who actually has the most power over their everyday lives, plus a series of scenarios that force them to decide when they’d speak, when they’d stay quiet, and whether silence can ever really be neutral.

At what point does keeping quiet become a decision in itself?

The views expressed in this episode are personal opinions and commentary. References to public figures, events and claims are discussed conversationally and should not be taken as verified factual reporting.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Moving out is supposed to be part of growing up. But in many South Asian families, leaving home can feel less like independence and more like rejection.

In this episode, Saf and Zoheb talk about moving out, living with parents after marriage, the expectations placed on South Asian sons, and what happens when family loyalty starts to clash with the need for your own space.

They also get into the pressure placed on wives entering a new family home, why some men grow up without basic domestic skills, and the blurred line between South Asian culture and religion.

Is staying at home always a sign of closeness? And does moving out really mean leaving your family behind?

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Content warning: This episode includes discussion of murder, the deaths of children, suicide and self-harm, postpartum mental illness, psychosis and other distressing details.

Nearly 30 years after Tupac Shakur was killed in Las Vegas, Duane “Keffe D” Davis has been convicted of first-degree murder for orchestrating the shooting. The jury took less than three hours to reach its verdict. Davis was not accused of firing the fatal shots himself, and the identity of the shooter has never been established in court. He is due to be sentenced on 13 October 2026 and has said he plans to appeal. (Reuters)

In Massachusetts, the Lindsay Clancy case ended very differently. After roughly 38 hours of deliberation across seven days, the jury could not reach a unanimous decision and a mistrial was declared. Reporting since the trial indicates 11 jurors favoured finding Clancy not criminally responsible, with one holdout. Her defence has now asked the judge to find her not guilty rather than allow a second trial. That motion is due to be heard on 29 September. Prosecutors have not yet announced whether they will seek a retrial if the motion fails. (Reuters)

In this episode, Saf and Zoheb talk through both cases, the decades of theories surrounding Tupac and Biggie, whether a case can really feel “solved” 30 years later, and what happens when even medical experts and jurors cannot agree on criminal responsibility.

They also get into the wider questions these cases raise: how much mental illness should change legal responsibility, whether one juror should be able to stop a verdict, and whether justice still means the same thing when it arrives decades late.

Important note: The Lindsay Clancy case remains active. This episode discusses publicly reported evidence, testimony and court proceedings available at the time of recording. Saf and Zoheb are sharing personal opinions and reactions, not making factual claims about medical diagnosis or legal guilt beyond what has been established in court. Some details discussed during the conversation are corrected or clarified as the episode progresses.

Recorded before the latest legal developments: Since recording, Lindsay Clancy’s defence has formally asked the judge to enter a finding of not guilty following the mistrial. A hearing is scheduled for 29 September 2026. Duane Davis remains awaiting sentencing on 13 October 2026 and has indicated that he intends to appeal.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Are we living through the age of fame without talent, or has social media simply given people opportunities they never had before?

Saf and Zoheb look back at how social media has changed from the days of Hi5, Bebo, MySpace, BBM and BlackBerry to a world where TikTok, Instagram and everything else follows us around in our pockets.

They get into whether life was actually better when you had to go home and log on, why so much of life now feels like it’s being performed for an audience, and what happens when attention itself becomes something people can turn into money.

There’s the influencer with a ring light in a restaurant, people sitting on TikTok Live asking strangers for gifts, the rise of people becoming rich and famous without any obvious talent, and the flip side of all of that: social media has also helped genuinely talented people get discovered, created careers that didn’t exist before and given ordinary people access to opportunities they may never otherwise have had.

They also talk about the UK’s planned under-16 social media ban, online safety, children growing up permanently connected, gaming platforms, trolls and whether social media has made it harder to separate the loudest people online from what people are actually like in real life.

And, because this is The Side Room, the conversation somehow also gets into Michael Jackson, old Nokia and Sony Ericsson phones, BlackBerry Messenger, Floyd Mayweather, a Bollywood singer getting suspended from Twitter and whether Saf and Zoheb could take Mayweather in a two-on-one fight.

Would either of them choose to keep social media if they had the option to get rid of it completely?

A note on the conversation: The views expressed in this episode are personal opinions, recollections and conversational commentary from the hosts. References to people, events and wider issues are not presented as verified factual reporting and should not be treated as such.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

South Asian parents love an expectation.

Do well at school. Go to uni. Get a good job. Don’t embarrass the family. And while you’re at it, why can’t you be more like your cousin?

In this episode, Saf and Zoheb talk about the pressure they grew up with, how much of it came from their parents, and how differently that pressure could land depending on whether you were the oldest, youngest, a boy or a girl.

They get into school, discipline, being compared to other people, the things South Asian dads absolutely do not apologise for, and the expectations that somehow follow you all the way into marriage.

Zoheb’s wife gets pulled into the conversation towards the end completely randomly. She wasn’t mic’d up, so the audio changes a bit, but the conversation was worth keeping in.

We barely scratched the surface with this one, so there’s definitely more to come.

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This episode discusses allegations and personal opinions around an ongoing public conversation.

A few clips we posted about Iksy started getting more attention than we expected, and then the DMs came in. People were sending us their own stories, screenshots and experiences. Some were detailed, some weren’t, and we obviously can’t verify everything we’ve been sent.

Then Iksy went on Podghost and gave his side of the story, so we sat down and talked about the whole thing properly.

We get into the allegations, his response, whether he seemed remorseful, accountability, second chances and what happens when people simply stop trusting you.

But it also turns into a much wider conversation about our own community. Why do the same stories around money, bad business and people taking advantage of each other keep coming up? Why does it feel like some of the things we saw growing up are still happening in our generation? And even if you forgive someone, does that mean you ever have to trust them again?

And yes, we also get into the clout-chasing comments, publicising sins, community responsibility and whether any of this should even be discussed publicly in the first place.

A note before listening:

This episode is a conversation and reflects the personal opinions of the people taking part. Any allegations or claims of wrongdoing discussed in this episode are allegations and should not be understood as findings of fact. We have not independently verified every claim, message or account referred to during the conversation, and we make no determination as to their truth or accuracy.

Some of the discussion refers to statements, allegations and commentary already circulating publicly or shared with us by third parties. Where we discuss these matters, we are doing so for the purposes of conversation, commentary and opinion.

We do not encourage harassment, threats, abuse, doxxing or contacting anyone mentioned in this episode, including their friends or family.

If you believe we have materially misstated something discussed in this episode, you can contact The Side Room directly.

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