Happy Mother's Day from the Rum Runnas! In the spirit of the day here are a few mom centric stories that will make you feel like calling your Mom no matter your relationship and saying "Hey, Thanks for not being Terrible."

From a Mother in India who threw her 6 year old disabled son into a crocodile infested canal because her husband kept blaming her for making a broken kid!

To a PA Mom at a local little league field, forgetting her son wasn't in the car after having a few too many drinks and backing directly into him!

So no matter what your mom's like at least she's not these two, so to all the Mom's trying their best and not throwing their kids to the crocodiles or hitting them with their cars have a Very Happy Mother's Day from the Rum Runnas!

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Featured Stories / Sources:

Don't Just Throw Out the Whole Kid / People:

https://people.com/mom-accused-throwing-son-canal-eaten-crocodiles-8644765?mibextid=K35XfP

Was That a Speed Bump or my Kid / 6ABC:

https://6abc.com/post/delaware-county-mother-facing-dui-charges-after-allegedly-backing-into-son-in-newtown-edgmont-little-league-parking-lot/14781068/?utm_source=fark&utm_medium=website&utm_content=link&ICID=ref_fark&fbclid=IwZXh0bgNhZW0CMTEAAR3qnM7WYSx7CSZSeoJTVQN9Jbg5VBKQF6dG-7mqIaeVrRaE2i_o-Y9n3sk_aem_AStw4gD7NJ-YEK8MQihEI8BbB4XZMFuCevOsVxy1Xh43Z-4nACp1_ITXqwdL6PQpdp--urdPDaRISoyxYCQnd3lH&mibextid=K35XfP#lw0thydq9e58ycpst1d

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Jarred and Kyle are back to go over more of the internet's weirdest and funniest news stories. This week the guys talk about a Botswana threatening Germany with Elephants and Cambodia hating dancing.

The President of Botswana threatens to send 20,000 Live Elephants to Germany if they don't change their current ban on the import of hunting trophies to combat poaching. Honestly if your giving away Elephants we'll take 3!

Cambodian President outlaws musical car horns because he saw a video on the internets that showed kids dancing to them, no one let this guy know about car radios or driving in Cambodia will be accompanied by only the sounds of the wind a blowing.

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Featured Stories / Sources:

Send in the Elephants / The Guardian:

https://www.theguardian.com/world/2024/apr/03/botswana-threatens-to-send-20000-elephants-to-germany-in-trophy-hunting-row?fbclid=IwAR1ZLiHQs_-Zy-tjuET3V2V-gLYJZfzoNlj4r2EhJCDG6eDMJT2wUCQKx0I_aem_AUxefzAv-YbZgEvdZ-hoK0EQ4f6eJgpnDAYhCu64pXkfLqcjLB4V3Q76-g34xLz_lLM

Dancing is for the Devil / The Guardian:

https://www.theguardian.com/world/2024/mar/19/cambodian-prime-minister-hun-manet-bans-musical-vehicle-horns-to-deter-dancing?fbclid=IwAR3XEjvZ5Ol9WSaqXV2383BDK_DuyLV6lvPg64TJZ8DtFa84Np1S-E4zUrk_aem_AUzpi80ZJCV4eCfArk2D5vuq4WX7eZeYtHpg0Jn_elZy9WtozNptBUT6dxt3e9kq-VY

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Jarred and Kyle are back to go over more of the internet's weirdest and funniest news stories. This week the guys talk about a Nude Duelist aka a Nuduelist fighting at Venice Beach with a Spiked Club and an AL Prisoner who died and was returned to his family with no brain.

A Nude Woman in CA was videoed fighting with a clothed woman (shirts vs skins) each battling with specifically spiked clubs. Even though this fight took place in front of witnesses and people were filming this no reports or charges have been filed.

An AL man died in prison and his family is trying to figure out why he was returned with no brain...but to make it even worse he was missing all of his organs.

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Featured Stories / Sources:

Naked Duel on the Beach / NBC:

https://www.nbclosangeles.com/news/local/nude-woman-spiked-club-venice-beach/3351086/?fbclid=IwAR3OGYnqy2l21uf_bC8fgK8Ewp4aaob3wTs59qN6IWUxNlFJU0fBAxamaZg_aem_AcJ_Ne8cdKthpHd5wPFQ9zwl8YnLhHOdLe3EsNCDRznQSAl7tMYQKvSuXgg_-hFJVZw

Didn't this dead guy have a brain / AL . com

https://www.al.com/news/birmingham/2024/02/alabama-prisoners-brain-missing-after-uab-autopsy-says-family.html?utm_source=reddit.com&fbclid=IwAR2Fwwecj6tGqrZ5aUJfQRtJyKbC9nH2Shu6cIHL1LtYZj9YBAk-kPLM9vI_aem_AfXbmKbTvdrH6-ac9Fhxp9VbG61xDxX-Ug9YrUnsexnPinXY7Z9zGwKvqXseOU1C2aQ

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Jarred and Kyle are back to go over more of the internet's weirdest and funniest news stories. This week the news goes feudal with both stories involving ancient Japanese warriors, well one involved a "samurai sword" and the other involved "ninja-like people":

In Vancouver WA a man is arrested for threatening people in Walmart with a samurai sword, that's pretty much all the story told us; the craziest thing to come out of this story is that we still after (not exhaustive but a decent amount of) research we still have no idea if this story is real or not because the story was so short and lacked any substance on any "legitimate" (cough* Fox News cough*) News Source and the better written more detailed source was literally NEWS GPT!!! So what came first the Fox Story or the AI Story...honestly we don't know.

GA is arrested for firing 127 ROUNDS at a store, shooting at "ninja-like" people, and hitting nothing but inanimate objects. We know that sounds (not even vaguely but very) racist on first listen, but we've reached a couple of options as to what happened. 1: This man was playing a real-life prop hunt and didn't win. 2: He stole a motorcycle and really hated the guy he was robbing so he really really really shot up the place. 3: This man is basically John Wick, he was actually being attacked by ninjas sent by a secret underground criminal syndicate and he did kill a bunch of them but the super-elite syndicate cleaned up the bodies before the cops got there (honestly think about how crazy John Wick would sound if he got arrested and tried to explain what he was doing). 4: Meth! All equally plausible.

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Featured Stories / Sources:

Walmart Sword Battles (AI or Not AI That is the Question) / FOX12:

https://www.kptv.com/2024/02/05/man-with-samurai-sword-threatens-people-walmart-vancouver/?fbclid=IwAR0DIlIgW8CQGTroEX6nLEg7O611tSDAwatVDb-46BVfzzxjHWhtkt7nKUw_aem_ARKO8s9nXsLT_lllmFGacnRkci5iLic8ho2wsnw5LRJgkTrAHjreEzHlJf2Orpj0EZI#lshmdtrc0yeho7bcmbw

It was them damn Ninjas / MDJ Online:

https://www.mdjonline.com/news/police_fire/marietta-man-accused-of-shooting-127-rounds-at-ninja-like-people/article_2ee7376e-bae9-11ee-9eeb-3fc90ac10133.html?fbclid=IwAR3xVcrEuKWHb9uPWdz0GfwmVgKqgJCgXoYYj5aSFInb7gDZORw5UGn8fls_aem_ARIzz2kKD39Oe6UBzj2T9tfAOrhCgVf25OzF88PQKQtuM4Vu3o1G-8HWUT98Psgkeog

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Jarred and Kyle are back to go over more of the internet's weirdest and funniest news stories. This week the guys start with an apparent biblical smiting and end on a good old-fashioned Rum Runnas brand story involving stuff being inserted into a part of the body it doesn't belong. Stories this week include:

A football player in Indonesia is struck by lightning and killed in the middle of the game. This is why you should definitely never play sports during a rain storm, but we honestly don't know the odds that this would happen with the sheer amount of taller and most likely metal objects that are all around sports stadiums how did a lightning bolt pick one player out. This is one of the few instances where the chance of a higher power might be real...and apparently, they bet on the opposing team.

An AUS man is in the hospital after attempting to get sexual gratification by shoving 3 (YES 3) batteries into his PENIS!!! We'll let the wave of pain fade from the male audience. We don't know why he did it or how he planned on getting it out, but this man shoved 3 BATTERIES IN HIS PENIS and then waited a whole 24 hours to go to the hospital! And then his penis started DYING!!!! Some people don't deserve to have a penis and the doctors agreed with that sentiment.

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Featured Stories / Sources:

If there's a God, They bet on the Other Team / the Hindustan Times:

https://www.hindustantimes.com/trending/footballer-dies-after-being-hit-by-lightning-in-indonesia-harrowing-incident-captured-on-camera-101707743854587.html?fbclid=IwAR3YuTni4E5n-2buq81ZvTJNLUJDoQhMs6C0vvaO2tlyPTSAwY2CHP4bLuQ_aem_AfX1xXrxqg5wAL6GTTO87M59n33chj9TORJPs78rHRf36C5WrdsSA8hnwAm9cnWYYDY

Don't Stick Those In There!!! / NDTV World:

https://www.ndtv.com/world-news/australia-doctors-remove-batteries-from-mans-penis-after-he-shoved-them-in-for-sexual-gratification-5073715/amp/1

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Jarred and Kyle are back to go over more of the internet's weirdest and funniest news stories. This week the guys start with a complete misunderstanding and end on a violent story that they don't know how to feel about. From UK people using weird words and making us think there is a war on birds with medieval weapons to a CO man "allegedly" biting off a cop's finger and all our thoughts on how it's alleged. Stories this week include:

In the UK Swans are under attack in a Swan Sanctuary, now 4 swans are dead and the method of death is a catapult. As two schmucks from America when we hear catapult we think medieval siege engines! Apparently, that's not what the UK thinks of when they hear catapults they think a freaking slingshot. We were disappointed with the twist but that didn't stop us from coming up with a slew of alternate theories of how 'swan attacks can leave 4 dead by catapult'.

In CO a man is in trouble for "allegedly" biting off a cop's finger, we didn't read any of the article before immediately building an elaborate tale of a young partner's hatred for his old backward-thinking partner with a penchant for unnecessary violence. In a world where you are that hated by your partner who truly would believe you didn't cut off your own finger? In the end, we discovered more but not enough info and have a few theories: 1: The guy really was a D-Bag and bit off the cop's finger 2: He was attacked by ninjas 3: he was possessed by a ghost like from the movie Fallen 4: This cop sucks and he cut off his own finger by uppercutting the man and hammer-fisting while his finger was in his mouth 5: The cop is entrapping this man and cut off his finger to sell it 6: It's meth! All Equally Plausible!

We Read The Click Bait So You Don't Have To!

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Featured Stories / Sources:

UK v Swans but with Catapults / BBC:

https://www.bbc.com/news/uk-england-surrey-68207847?fbclid=IwAR0-4vRsxIROAdtWkDmkx9srAa4pPJEN6gIQXkGclcf1mO1jPupLcHIz6v8_aem_ARJJcKe3sbBR-PWE50vZGInGDcG9wqWB2ezj7Cu1KL9Gyr_7lGNRLYFRgmi3l6jyymM

How did he maybe bite off a finger / KQRE:

https://www.krqe.com/news/weird/man-allegedly-bites-off-spits-out-part-of-officers-finger-during-arrest-in-denver/?utm_source=fark&utm_medium=website&utm_content=link&ICID=ref_fark&fbclid=IwAR1k1a5Z9FYQPQRj5BFqRYCyVzG-VnvD7vBnaPjzMNIU3LusPcLKSdKgbyk_aem_ARJzsZc3eWXmm4oV7ZiXey2RP7Ac6CJLXaPDq3haZPHZj3uZzt07QlfC42ySBsc8bWM

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Jarred and Kyle are back to go over more of the internet's weirdest and funniest news stories. This week the guys dive deep into some bathroom-heavy stories; between a Chinese Chess Scandal that had bathtub poop to a Floridaman covered in excrement from an exploding toilet, topped off with a good deal of anger toward fast food places and our pleas to bring back all the good stuff you got rid of. Stories this week include:

In the world of Chinese Chess, the new tournament champion is in some hot water, now being stripped of his win after partying to celebrate and taking a poop in the bathtub that in some way that is not detailed damaged the bathtub. That isn't even the end of their problems after accusations of more anal bead cheating rocks the chess world.

Floridaman visits his local Dunkin and instead of coffee and donuts, he found himself walking out covered in poop and piss! Now he's suing and honestly, the amount he's asking for is too low cause being covered in excrement after a toilet explodes and the employees know it was an issue is so icky yucky gross this dude needs a million dollars.

We Read The Click Bait So You Don't Have To!

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Featured Stories / Sources:

More Chess Sex Toy Cheating this Time With Poop / SBNation:

https://www.sbnation.com/2024/1/4/24025155/chess-sex-toy-cheating-scandal-bathtub-poop-china?fbclid=IwAR0tgrVaO-NAV4Ao4usMCCBoDjX7-5qUn81CNn8sU5TGY0-Jgqz7f67SZjU_aem_AUoiuPcxk2JFdKgdXJTANtlRdce_vFQsJw9Y4Y_bUXsFjqduZK9sGWrXqSqWH2aaO7A

He’s not Wrong He’s Filthy / Click Orlando:

https://www.clickorlando.com/news/local/2024/01/04/florida-man-sues-dunkin-donuts-after-toilet-explosion-covers-him-in-waste/?fbclid=IwAR3ovuqPk344wgnEFf10hFiPHS-lza7kClNYzoU1V_dtzl9HJtMhXGGpE7Y_aem_AUqVcbGYmB_WZiYsnru6AoVqr0mMZ7NTYuEH8Tv43UrKEsK0m0nclH_BblOv8ZJnoi0

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Jarred and Kyle are back to go over more of the internet's weirdest and funniest news stories. With their fair share of tangents; speaking of that who's down to invest in a house built inside of a barn let us know if you're in after you hear the pitch. This week we talk about:

Firefighters in OK were having a hard time putting out a house fire due to the recent unseasonably cold weather, if that wasn't bad enough they kept running into venomous snakes all throughout the house!

2 St Louis men robbed a local foot locker at gun point and fled, they would have maybe gotten away with it too if it weren't for one of the men's overwhelming need to blast porn and take care of business in a stolen car parked in Waffle House Parking Lot. There aren't many rules at Waffle House but that's one of them.

We Read The Click Bait So You Don't Have To!

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Watch Video Versions and Support Us On:

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Featured Stories / Sources:

How are these connected / 2 News OK:

https://www.kjrh.com/news/local-news/venomous-snakes-cold-challenge-sand-springs-firefighters-in-structure-fire?fbclid=IwAR3lwp-w3RXFVgmi-QKLcx6kle3jCcMR7QNt62kKD-dkfuKQDIHsjIPm9Wg_aem_AUom5hMhNYL-VSKHBsEEwr02j9SHgW76q9xoWfOAbyrbQxwsjKHWldI_vuh0bxjNWKo

He was “Busted” alright / Riverfront Times:

https://www.riverfronttimes.com/news/loud-sex-noises-lead-to-st-louis-robber-getting-busted-41639996?utm_source=fark&utm_medium=website&utm_content=link&ICID=ref_fark&fbclid=IwAR2JD1HUwBo0XBjjHUs2x2yeoSfdNCJE5QlEUwnpt8muLIfMJlV2okXcBcA_aem_AUpJ1J29CnUdIlOnZIuSqZ0zveGJjnh8sbifoR83LXmxiFd3WSJY-9iRuq8WfyK3u8w

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