Have you ever thought about someone, remembered all sorts of things about them, and still not remembered that you never replied to their message? Or are you the person waiting on that reply, wondering what you did wrong?

This week Alison shares something that genuinely blew her mind. Remembering a person and remembering the task you meant to do for that person are not the same memory. She unpacks prospective memory, why some brains open someone’s “entire file” while others don’t, and why forgetting is not a reflection of how much you care.

She also gets real about the way we talk about ourselves when our brains don’t do what we expect. As a mum, it breaks her heart to hear kids say “I’m hopeless at remembering things”, and she shares how we can swap self-criticism for self-compassion without letting go of accountability.

In this episode:

• What prospective memory is, and why everyday cues (like the empty toothpaste tube) matter so much
• Why thinking about someone doesn’t guarantee you’ll remember the reply you owe them
• The “open the whole file” brain vs the “there’s Alison, file closed” brain
• How ADHD can affect prospective memory, and why these differences aren’t exclusive to neurodivergent people
• The difference between “I’m struggling with this” and “I’m hopeless”
• Separating the behaviour from the person, for our kids and for ourselves
• Intent, behaviour and impact, and why self-compassion and accountability can exist together
• Practical systems that help, from reminders to communicating how your brain works
• The hidden weight of carrying everyone’s open loops, and the idea of a little mental pruning

which brain are you? Do you run a massive filing system, or can you think of someone and close the file? Send Alison a DM and let her know.

If this episode made you think of someone, share it with them. It might change the story you’re both telling yourselves.

Follow Alison On IG HERE

Check out the Our Neurodiverse Family Website HERE