What can you do when a conflict leaves you hurt, overwhelmed, or stuck—and the other person isn’t ready to talk?

This week on The Leader in You, Paulina and Dr. Lola explore how to use the EmC Reconnection Process on your own to understand your emotions and prepare for a difficult conversation. Through a personal story, Dr. Lola walks through identifying triggers, recognizing sensitivities, naming feelings, and getting clear about the reassurance you need.

Whether you tend to pull away or push harder during conflict, this episode offers a practical way to regain your balance and approach relationships at work and at home with greater clarity and courage.

Grab your EmC journal or a piece of paper and follow along. Learn more at EmC Leaders.

The Leader in You is the go-to podcast for anyone who wants to create a workplace culture where teams can thrive.

Envision a future where you are more grounded, confident, and in sync with your team.

CONNECT:
EmC Leaders
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RESOURCES:
TESA - TEAM EMOTIONAL SAFETY ASSESSMENT
RESOURCES & DOWNLOADS
CONFLICT RESOLUTION MASTER PROGRAM
CONTACT US

Connect with Dr. Lola Gershfeld:

LinkedIn: Dr. Lola Gershfeld
Instagram: @drlolaemc

Connect with Polina Marian:

LinkedIn: Polina Marian
Instagram: @livewithfivekids

Dr. Lola Gershfeld, a distinguished organizational psychologist, has dedicated her career to delving into the intricate layers of employee engagement, team dynamics, and wo...

What do healthcare leaders and elementary school students have in common? They both need tools to work through conflict and reconnect.

In this episode of The Leader in You, Dr. Lola and Paulina share stories from their training at Renown Health and from a classroom of fourth, fifth, and sixth graders. Through the EMC Reconnection Process, they explore how naming feelings, recognizing protective behaviors, and offering reassurance can help people move beyond blame and toward understanding.

From lingering workplace tensions to playground disagreements, discover why repairing relationships is a skill we can start learning young—and keep practicing throughout life.

The Leader in You is the go-to podcast for anyone who wants to create a workplace culture where teams can thrive.

Envision a future where you are more grounded, confident, and in sync with your team.

CONNECT:
EmC Leaders
Facebook
Twitter
LinkedIn
YouTube Channel

RESOURCES:
TESA - TEAM EMOTIONAL SAFETY ASSESSMENT
RESOURCES & DOWNLOADS
CONFLICT RESOLUTION MASTER PROGRAM
CONTACT US

Connect with Dr. Lola Gershfeld:

LinkedIn: Dr. Lola Gershfeld
Instagram: @drlolaemc

Connect with Polina Marian:

LinkedIn: Polina Marian
Instagram: @livewithfivekids

Dr. Lola Gershfeld, a distinguished organizational psychologist, has dedicated her career to delving into the intricate layers of employee engagement, team dynamics, and wo...

What happens when three people who teach emotional connection actually find themselves in a real conflict together?

In this episode of The Leader in You, Dr. Lola Gershfeld, Polina Marian, and returning guest Aric Bostick sit down in Reno after a dinner conversation unexpectedly turned into a moment of real disconnection.

Rather than avoiding the tension, brushing it aside, or simply apologizing and moving on, they used the EmC Reconnection Process to slow the moment down and understand what was happening underneath the conflict.

Aric shares openly about becoming triggered, recognizing the deeper raw spot behind his reaction, and what it felt like to experience repair in real time. Polina reflects on what she noticed in the interaction, while Lola explains how emotional triggers, attachment needs, and our automatic ways of protecting ourselves can quickly pull us into a negative cycle.

Together, they explore why we sometimes take things personally, how past relational experiences can show up in present-day interactions, and why conflict itself is not necessarily the problem. The real question is: Do we know how to repair when connection is disrupted?

You’ll also hear how the EmC Reconnection Process helps people move from the trigger to the deeper emotion, to understanding what each person needs in order to feel seen, valued, and connected again.

This is not a conversation about conflict in theory. It is a real example of what can happen when people are willing to stay present, get curious, and work their way back to each other.

Because strong relationships are not built by never getting disconnected.

They are built by knowing how to reconnect.

The Leader in You is the go-to podcast for anyone who wants to create a workplace culture where teams can thrive.

Envision a future where you are more grounded, confident, and in sync with your team.

CONNECT:
EmC Leaders
Facebook
Twitter
LinkedIn
YouTube Channel

RESOURCES:
TESA - TEAM EMOTIONAL SAFETY ASSESSMENT
RESOURCES & DOWNLOADS
CONFLICT RESOLUTION MASTER PROGRAM
CONTACT US

Connect with Dr. Lola Gershfeld:

LinkedIn: Dr. Lola Gershfeld
Instagram: @drlolaemc

Connect with Polina Marian:

LinkedIn: Polina Marian
Instagram: @livewithfivekids

Dr. Lola Gershfeld, a distinguished organizational psychologist, has dedicated her career to delving into the intricate layers of employee engagement, team dynamics, and wo...

Sometimes the words “I’m fine” mean exactly that. But sometimes, they are a way of covering hurt, fear, shame, or a sense of disconnection that feels too difficult to put into words.

In recognition of Suicide Prevention Month, Dr. Lola Gershfeld and Polina Marian explore an important question: How can leaders create an environment where people feel safe enough to say when they are struggling?

In this episode of The Leader in You, they discuss how emotional disconnection can lead people to withdraw, shut down, or convince themselves that what they are experiencing does not matter. Dr. Lola explains why leaders need to pay attention not only to what employees say, but also to the emotion underneath their words.

Through practical examples and role-play, you’ll learn how to respond when someone says “It’s fine,” how to slow down difficult conversations rather than dismiss or immediately solve them, and how four simple responses—reflect, accept, validate, and reassure—can help another person feel heard, valued, and less alone.

The conversation also explores why leadership is fundamentally about attunement: being able to recognize when connection has been disrupted and helping people regain a sense of safety and balance.

Because sometimes the most important message a leader can communicate is simply: You matter. Your experience matters. And you don’t have to carry it alone.

The Leader in You is the go-to podcast for anyone who wants to create a workplace culture where teams can thrive.

Envision a future where you are more grounded, confident, and in sync with your team.

CONNECT:
EmC Leaders
Facebook
Twitter
LinkedIn
YouTube Channel

RESOURCES:
TESA - TEAM EMOTIONAL SAFETY ASSESSMENT
RESOURCES & DOWNLOADS
CONFLICT RESOLUTION MASTER PROGRAM
CONTACT US

Connect with Dr. Lola Gershfeld:

LinkedIn: Dr. Lola Gershfeld
Instagram: @drlolaemc

Connect with Polina Marian:

LinkedIn: Polina Marian
Instagram: @livewithfivekids

Dr. Lola Gershfeld, a distinguished organizational psychologist, has dedicated her career to delving into the intricate layers of employee engagement, team dynamics, and wo...

When your team is already overwhelmed, talking about emotions can feel like one more task. But what if those conversations are what help everyone regain focus and move forward?

In this episode of The Leader in You, Dr. Lola Gershfeld and Polina Marian explore how the EMC process brings structure to difficult conversations, helping leaders move beyond blame and understand the emotions beneath workplace conflict.

Through real workplace examples, they discuss recognizing triggers, interrupting negative cycles, and regaining your own emotional balance before helping others. They also explore how reassurance and repeated moments of connection can ease old hurts and build greater security in working relationships.

Tune in to discover how everyday conflicts can become opportunities to strengthen trust, reconnect with your team, and lead with greater clarity.

The Leader in You is the go-to podcast for anyone who wants to create a workplace culture where teams can thrive.

Envision a future where you are more grounded, confident, and in sync with your team.

CONNECT:
EmC Leaders
Facebook
Twitter
LinkedIn
YouTube Channel

RESOURCES:
TESA - TEAM EMOTIONAL SAFETY ASSESSMENT
RESOURCES & DOWNLOADS
CONFLICT RESOLUTION MASTER PROGRAM
CONTACT US

Connect with Dr. Lola Gershfeld:

LinkedIn: Dr. Lola Gershfeld
Instagram: @drlolaemc

Connect with Polina Marian:

LinkedIn: Polina Marian
Instagram: @livewithfivekids

Dr. Lola Gershfeld, a distinguished organizational psychologist, has dedicated her career to delving into the intricate layers of employee engagement, team dynamics, and wo...

What makes people feel safe enough to trust, connect, and thrive at work?

In this episode, Dr. Lola Gershfeld and Polina Marian sit down with speaker and educator Aric Bostick to explore how attachment science can transform the way we think about leadership.

Aric shares why he believes attachment is one of the missing pieces in building trust and resilience—and why a leader’s own sense of security can have a powerful impact on the people around them.

Together, they explore what it means to become a source of security for others: being present and available, helping people feel seen, understanding the behaviors underneath disconnection, and creating relationships where people feel safe enough to be open, ask for what they need, and repair when things go wrong.

The conversation also gets personal as Aric reflects on his own journey toward greater security and the role relationships, vulnerability, and repair have played along the way.

It’s a lively and deeply human conversation about a simple but powerful idea: when leaders create security in relationships, people are better able to connect, trust, and become resilient.

Connect with Aric Bostick:
Learn more about Aric, his speaking, leadership training, and programs at AricBostick.com.

The Leader in You is the go-to podcast for anyone who wants to create a workplace culture where teams can thrive.

Envision a future where you are more grounded, confident, and in sync with your team.

CONNECT:
EmC Leaders
Facebook
Twitter
LinkedIn
YouTube Channel

RESOURCES:
TESA - TEAM EMOTIONAL SAFETY ASSESSMENT
RESOURCES & DOWNLOADS
CONFLICT RESOLUTION MASTER PROGRAM
CONTACT US

Connect with Dr. Lola Gershfeld:

LinkedIn: Dr. Lola Gershfeld
Instagram: @drlolaemc

Connect with Polina Marian:

LinkedIn: Polina Marian
Instagram: @livewithfivekids

Dr. Lola Gershfeld, a distinguished organizational psychologist, has dedicated her career to delving into the intricate layers of employee engagement, team dynamics, and wo...

What does it really mean to be a secure leader—and why does emotional connection matter so much when the pressure is on?

In Episode 104 of The Leader in You, Dr. Lola Gershfeld and Polina welcome back Dr. Jaime Goff, author of The Secure Leader, for a powerful conversation about how attachment science can transform the way leaders build trust, navigate difficult conversations, and create stronger teams.

Jaime shares how her background in psychotherapy and attachment theory led her into leadership and organizational development—and why emotional security isn’t simply about staying calm or confident. Secure leaders create relationships where people feel seen, heard, supported, and safe enough to be honest.

Together, Lola and Jaime explore attunement, vulnerability, emotional accessibility, and relationship repair—including why validating someone’s experience doesn’t mean agreeing with them, how slowing down can reduce resistance, and why leaders sometimes need to be the first to show vulnerability.

Jaime also shares a personal leadership story about facing an intimidating conversation with a senior colleague and former professor. Instead of hiding her anxiety behind authority, she named what she was feeling. The result? The other person softened, the conversation opened up, and Jaime experienced firsthand how attachment-based principles can change difficult workplace interactions.

The conversation also explores how attachment styles influence the way we respond when we feel stressed or triggered, how negative cycles develop within teams, and why creating emotional safety has to begin with leadership.

If you want to build a team that can stay connected—not just when things are going well, but when conversations become difficult—this episode offers a different way to think about what strong leadership really looks like.

🤝 Connect with Dr. Jaime Goff: https://drjaimegoff.com/

The Leader in You is the go-to podcast for anyone who wants to create a workplace culture where teams can thrive.

Envision a future where you are more grounded, confident, and in sync with your team.

CONNECT:
EmC Leaders
Facebook
Twitter
LinkedIn
YouTube Channel

RESOURCES:
TESA - TEAM EMOTIONAL SAFETY ASSESSMENT
RESOURCES & DOWNLOADS
CONFLICT RESOLUTION MASTER PROGRAM
CONTACT US

Connect with Dr. Lola Gershfeld:

LinkedIn: Dr. Lola Gershfeld
Instagram: @drlolaemc

Connect with Polina Marian:

LinkedIn: Polina Marian
Instagram: @livewithfivekids

Dr. Lola Gershfeld, a distinguished organizational psychologist, has dedicated her career to delving into the intricate layers of employee engagement, team dynamics, and wo...

Five years after the original release of Emotional Connection, Dr. Lola Gershfeld and co-author Ramin Sedehi reunite to reflect on what they have learned about emotions, trust, leadership, and relationships—and celebrate the launch of the book’s second edition.

At the heart of their conversation is a powerful idea: when conflict happens, we often focus on what was said, what happened, or who was right. But beneath the content is an emotional experience that is shaping how people react, protect themselves, and relate to one another.

Ramin and Lola share the story behind Emotional Connection, how their own thinking has evolved over the past five years, and why emotional connection matters far beyond the workplace.

They explore what it means to:

• Recognize the emotions underneath conflict rather than continually arguing about the content.
• Build trust by connecting with people at a deeper level than expertise, authority, or transactions.
• Create space for another person's emotions without immediately trying to fix the problem.
• Recognize the negative patterns that keep people disconnected.
• Regulate your own emotions so you can respond differently—even when the other person isn't ready to work on the relationship.
• Use emotional connection to strengthen relationships at work, at home, and throughout life.

Dr. Lola also shares an important realization from her recent work: repairing a relationship doesn't always have to begin with two willing people. Sometimes one person, by changing how they regulate, respond, and create emotional safety, can begin changing the entire pattern between them.

As Ramin puts it, work and life aren't separate worlds. It's all one life—and our ability to connect with one another shapes all of it.

This episode is a celebration of five years of Emotional Connection, but even more, it's a conversation about what becomes possible when people feel valued, cared for, heard, and emotionally safe with one another.

The Leader in You is the go-to podcast for anyone who wants to create a workplace culture where teams can thrive.

Envision a future where you are more grounded, confident, and in sync with your team.

CONNECT:
EmC Leaders
Facebook
Twitter
LinkedIn
YouTube Channel

RESOURCES:
TESA - TEAM EMOTIONAL SAFETY ASSESSMENT
RESOURCES & DOWNLOADS
CONFLICT RESOLUTION MASTER PROGRAM
CONTACT US

Connect with Dr. Lola Gershfeld:

LinkedIn: Dr. Lola Gershfeld
Instagram: @drlolaemc

Connect with Polina Marian:

LinkedIn: Polina Marian
Instagram: @livewithfivekids

Dr. Lola Gershfeld, a distinguished organizational psychologist, has dedicated her career to delving into the intricate layers of employee engagement, team dynamics, and wo...