In this episode of the BlackSheep Podcast we dive headfirst into one of the most uncomfortable and misunderstood conversations of our time, pornography, intimacy, conditioning, and what it’s actually doing to our relationships and our nervous systems.

I open up about growing up in the era where porn shifted from hidden magazines to instant, unlimited access online, and how that evolution quietly shaped how we think about sex, connection, performance, and even our own self-worth. We talk about the history, the psychology, the normalization, and the programming behind it, but more importantly how it shows up in real couples sitting across from us today in counseling.

This conversation is not about shame, it’s about awareness. We unpack why so many people struggle with intimacy, why arousal patterns get rewired, how porn becomes a form of self-soothing, and how resentment and disconnection are built when we don’t understand the root of what’s actually happening.

We also explore the deeper questions, what real union looks like, how vulnerability and communication get replaced by performance, and why so many relationships fall apart over something no one knows how to talk about honestly.

And we don’t just leave it there. We finish with practical ways to begin deprogramming, rebuilding connection, and relearning intimacy from a place of presence instead of conditioning.

This one is raw, uncomfortable, and necessary.

If you’ve ever wondered why modern relationships feel disconnected, this episode is for you.

📍 Topics we cover• The evolution of porn from taboo to mainstream• Conditioning, dopamine, and escalation• Erectile dysfunction, performance anxiety, and intimacy issues• Porn as self-regulation and coping• The loss of true connection in modern sex• Shame loops and secrecy• How to start deprogramming and rebuilding real intimacy