The Conversations We Have About People in Our Heads
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Have you ever been frustrated with someone without actually saying anything to them?
I have. And I've noticed something happens when criticism stays in my head: I start collecting evidence.
Once I've decided someone is selfish, difficult, lazy, inconsiderate—or whatever verdict I've reached—suddenly I notice everything they do that proves I was right.
In this episode, I talk about the difference between discernment and judgment, what unspoken criticism does to our relationships, and why the stories we tell ourselves about other people can become so powerful.
And for those of us who follow Jesus, there's another layer to this. Sometimes the most important prayer isn't, “God, would you change them?”
It's “God, what needs to change in me?”
Because the conversation you're having about someone in your head may be changing the way you see them—even if you never say a word.