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How a major gifts fundraiser prevents burnout by planning emotional refills on purpose.

Fundraising asks a lot of your brain, your heart, and your nervous system. In this conversation, Erin sits down with major gifts fundraiser Melody Wells to talk honestly about what it costs to pour yourself into donor relationships—and how she intentionally fills back up so she can keep doing the work she loves.

Melody shares how integrity and alignment (her version of ikigai) fuel her fundraising, why she refuses to take donor “no’s” personally, and how anxiety work and therapy unexpectedly prepared her to stay steady in the yes/no roller coaster of major gifts. She also walks through the three personalized “refill” categories she keeps on a written list—so when she’s emotionally depleted, she doesn’t have to think about how to recover.

In this episode, you’ll hear:

• Why caring deeply about the mission both powers your work and drains your emotional reserves
• How Melody separates her worth from donor decisions—seeing both yes and no as not about her
• The concept of ikigai and how it helped her pivot from celebrity journalism into meaningful fundraising
• Why planning post-campaign recovery in advance is as important as planning the campaign itself
• Melody’s three renewal buckets: staycation/retreat, energy release, and empowerment & mental strengthening

Journal prompt:
Where does fundraising most “drain your cup” right now—and what would go in your own three categories of renewal to intentionally refill it?

Book your 1:1 Brave and Balanced Breakthrough Coaching Session here: https://calendly.com/vitalistcoaching/brave-balanced-breakthrough

✨ Stay Connected & Continue Your Fundraising Growth

Listen to all episodes + subscribe:
https://thebraveandbalancedfundraiser.buzzsprout.com

Join the community:
The Brave & Balanced Fundraiser Facebook Group
👉 https://www.facebook.com/groups/braveandbalancedfundraiser

Book a Brave & Balanced Breakthrough Call:
A personalized 1:1 session to support your inner clarity and fundraising wellbeing.
👉 https://calendly.com/vitalistcoaching/brave-balanced-breakthrough

Learn more about Erin’s coaching & nervous-system based support:
VitalistCoaching.com

Connect on Instagram:
@erinmcquadewright

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What to do when your expertise isn’t respected—and how to stop making it mean something about you.

📘 Episode Summary

What happens when you bring solid fundraising expertise—and someone with less experience dismisses it? In this episode, Erin explores a common but rarely discussed dynamic: being treated like “the help” instead of a strategic professional.

She shares a personal story about having her work overruled, the emotional spiral that followed, and the deeper pattern underneath it. You’ll learn how early messages about money and worth can shape your reactions at work, why certain comments sting more than others, and how to stop letting others’ opinions define your value.

If you’ve ever felt dismissed, underestimated, or sidelined as a fundraiser, this episode will show you how to reclaim your power and stop shrinking in the face of pushback.

💡 Key Takeaways

• Someone else’s inability to value your expertise says more about their patterns than your worth.
• Your worthiness is innate—not determined by which ideas leadership approves.
• The part that gets hurt is often the part that already believes a version of the painful story.
• Your idea is not you; separation creates freedom.
• Try on the energy of the fundraiser who knows they’re worthy—who bends but doesn’t break.

📝 Journal Prompt

How would you stand, speak, and decide if you deeply believed your worthiness wasn’t up for grabs?

Book your 1:1 Brave and Balanced Breakthrough Coaching Session here: https://calendly.com/vitalistcoaching/brave-balanced-breakthrough

✨ Stay Connected & Continue Your Fundraising Growth

Listen to all episodes + subscribe:
https://thebraveandbalancedfundraiser.buzzsprout.com

Join the community:
The Brave & Balanced Fundraiser Facebook Group
👉 https://www.facebook.com/groups/braveandbalancedfundraiser

Book a Brave & Balanced Breakthrough Call:
A personalized 1:1 session to support your inner clarity and fundraising wellbeing.
👉 https://calendly.com/vitalistcoaching/brave-balanced-breakthrough

Learn more about Erin’s coaching & nervous-system based support:
VitalistCoaching.com

Connect on Instagram:
@erinmcquadewright

Send us a text

A somatic, compassionate practice to regulate your nervous system before making the ask.

📘 Episode Summary

This bonus meditation is a guided somatic practice designed to support you before donor meetings, fundraising conversations, or any moment when anxiety begins to take over. In this practice, Erin gently guides you through grounding in your body, noticing your felt experience, and working with Byron Katie’s inquiry process (“The Work”) to loosen the grip of anxious thoughts that often show up before making an ask.

You’ll explore a real fundraising memory—at a level that feels manageable—and uncover the belief fueling your anxiety. Then, through awareness, inquiry, and compassionate self-forgiveness based on the Spiritual Psychology tools from the University of Santa Monica, you’ll shift into a regulated, steady internal climate.

This meditation helps you:

• understand your body’s signals
• release pressure around specific donor outcomes
• reconnect with your inherent worth
• step into donor conversations with grounded confidence

Use this practice anytime you want to regulate your nervous system before fundraising, asking for support, or stepping into leadership.

💡 What This Meditation Supports

• Nervous system regulation before the ask
• Reducing anxiety in donor interactions
• Building somatic awareness of your emotional patterns
• Loosening the belief that your worth depends on a donor’s “yes”
• Creating spaciousness and grounded presence in your body

🛑 Important Note

This meditation includes checking in with your body and revisiting memories. If you know you carry Big T trauma, or if certain memories feel overwhelming, please practice this with a licensed therapist or trained somatic practitioner.
Your wellbeing comes first. If at any moment you feel flooded or unable to stay in the present moment, you have full permission to stop, drink water, step outside, or do whatever helps you return to safety.

📝 What You’ll Need

• A quiet place to sit
• A journal and pen
• Willingness to slow down and meet yourself with compassion

🎧 When to Use This Meditation

• Before donor meetings
• Before crafting a fundraising appeal
• When procrastination or avoidance kicks in
• When your body feels tight, pressured, or anxious
• When you want to reconnect with your own regulated presence

👥 Join the Community

Come share your experience with this meditation inside The Brave & Balanced Fundraiser Facebook Group, where fundraisers support one another in cultivating emotional mastery, nervous-system regulation, and grounded leadership.

➡️ Ready for deeper support?

If yo

✨ Stay Connected & Continue Your Fundraising Growth

Listen to all episodes + subscribe:
https://thebraveandbalancedfundraiser.buzzsprout.com

Join the community:
The Brave & Balanced Fundraiser Facebook Group
👉 https://www.facebook.com/groups/braveandbalancedfundraiser

Book a Brave & Balanced Breakthrough Call:
A personalized 1:1 session to support your inner clarity and fundraising wellbeing.
👉 https://calendly.com/vitalistcoaching/brave-balanced-breakthrough

Learn more about Erin’s coaching & nervous-system based support:
VitalistCoaching.com

Connect on Instagram:
@erinmcquadewright