On today's episode of The Be Ruthless Show, I unpack a question that derails more conversations than we realize:

“Why are you yelling at me?”

What if no one was actually yelling?

I talk about how quickly people jump to conclusions based on tone and volume, and how often those assumptions create unnecessary hurt, distance, and conflict. This episode explores why loud does not automatically mean angry, aggressive, or unsafe, and how hearing differences, cultural norms, personality styles, stress, and grief all shape the way we communicate.

I break down why our nervous systems default to defense mode, how emotional memory overrides logic, and why silence and walking away often cause more damage than asking one simple question.

This episode is an invitation to pause before assuming, ask before withdrawing, and choose clarity over conclusions.

Because not every raised voice is a raised fight, and curiosity could save a relationship.

Remember,

You can reach out anytime:⁠

sam@griefhab.org⁠

Join the Griefhab Family:

https://www.facebook.com/groups/griefhab7⁠

Join Team Ruthless - for multiple support groups every week and EVERY holiday!

https://samantharuth.com/team-ruthless

Become a Faces of Grief: Surviving Pet Loss Author:

https://samantharuth.com/apply-to-be-an-author

On today’s important episode of The Be Ruthless Show, I address the targeted killing of a licensed mental health counselor inside her Orlando office and the uncomfortable truth the profession avoids. This was not random violence. This was intentional, and it happened in a space designed for healing.

I break down why this loss hits so deeply for clinicians, especially those in private practice, and why empathy, skill, and experience do not make someone immune to physical danger. I speak to the silence within mental health culture around workplace violence, the pressure to internalize risk, and the myth that better boundaries or better therapy could have prevented harm.

This episode challenges the idea that safety measures mean fear, that boundaries provoke violence, or that therapists are responsible for managing other people’s dangerous behavior. I name the ethical tension between duty to care and duty to self, and why being a “good therapist” should never require being a martyr.

This is a conversation about grief, anger, fear, and the collective impact incidents like this have on the field. It is also a call for ruthless honesty about risk, responsibility, and the right of mental health professionals to go home alive.

Content note: This episode discusses workplace violence and death. Listener discretion is advised.

If this episode stirred something in you, you’re not alone. You’re not weak. And you’re not overreacting.

Because compassion is not a bulletproof vest.

Remember, You can reach out anytime:⁠

sam@griefhab.org⁠

Join the Griefhab Family:

https://www.facebook.com/groups/griefhab7⁠

Join Team Ruthless - for multiple support groups every week and EVERY holiday!

https://samantharuth.com/team-ruthless

Become a Faces of Grief: Surviving Pet Loss Author:

https://samantharuth.com/apply-to-be-an-author

On Sunday - January 18th, Griefhab turns 5!

Five!

Five years ago, Griefhab started as an idea. Today, it’s a more than a community. On today’s episode of The Be Ruthless Show, I reflect on what’s changed from then until now, what grief has taught me in real time, and what I want you to know if you’re still trying to find your footing after loss. This episode is about truth, love, and learning how to live again without pretending you’re “over it.”

In this episode, we talk about:

• What it means to keep living while still missing them
• The shift from “What’s wrong with me?” to “What happened to me?”
• Why “closure” isn’t the goal and what actually helps
• How grief changes you, and why “different” doesn’t mean “broken”
• What it looks like to ask for support without needing to be “fixed”
• A guided moment to help you honor who (or what) you miss

Remember,

You can reach out anytime:⁠

sam@griefhab.org⁠

Join the Griefhab Family

https://www.facebook.com/groups/griefhab7⁠

Join Team Ruthless - for multiple support groups every week and EVERY holiday!

https://samantharuth.com/team-ruthless

Become a Faces of Grief: Surviving Pet Loss Author:

https://samantharuth.com/apply-to-be-an-author