A healthy marriage doesn’t happen on accident—it’s built with intention, practice, and a few simple rhythms that strengthen connection over time. In this episode, James and Lisa introduce four foundational habits that have shaped their marriage, their coaching, and the couples they’ve served for years. You’ll walk away with practical next steps you can start this week—especially around Habit 1 (Love God First) and Habit 2 (Love & Respect).

Key Points / What You’ll Learn

• Why the new year is a natural “reset” for your marriage—not an overhaul, but a recalibration
• The four habits of a healthy marriage (and why they’re simple, biblical, and practical)
• Habit 1: Love God First—how spiritual alignment becomes the foundation your marriage draws strength from
• Why loving God first is a daily orientation, not a one-time decision or a religious checkbox
• Practical ways to build spiritual rhythms together (even with busy schedules)
• Habit 2: Love & Respect—how small, consistent gestures shape the emotional culture of your marriage
• Why unmet core needs often sit underneath conflict—and how love/respect gives you language for what’s really happening
• A direct challenge for husbands (and wives): what did you do while pursuing your spouse that you’ve stopped doing?
• Simple “start this week” actions that create momentum over time

Action Steps for This Week

• Choose one spiritual practice (worship, prayer, scripture, church) and commit to it together this week.
• Ask each other: “What is one way I can show you love or respect this week?” Then follow through.
• Think of one small pursuit habit you used to do early on (a note, a text, opening the door, favorite coffee) and bring it back.

Links & Resources Mentioned (and helpful defaults)

• Marriage Intensive (reset, rebuild, find common ground)
• Schedule a call with James & Lisa
• The Collective (online community for marriage rhythms)
• Weekly Practice Email (sent every Monday)
• Marriage devotional: Marriage Moments: Devotions to Realign and Renew (Jeff & Ashley Hickman at jeffandashley@mess2miracle.com)

Previous Episodes:

• Hummingbirds, Vultures, and the Mindset That Can Change Your Marriage
• Us in Mind: How Changing Your Thoughts Can Change Your Marriage With Ted Lowe

5 Voices Resources:

• Take a FREE 5 Voices Assessment
• 5 Voices for Marriage Course

Connect With Us

• Instagram: @artofspousing
• Website: www.artofspousing.com

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