In this Feedwarmer episode of Rigour & Flow, we spotlight a podcast that had us nodding, wincing, laughing, and quietly re-evaluating our own friendships.

We open with a short preamble and reflections on adult friendship; the stories we tell ourselves about loyalty, closeness, and safety, and the moments when something starts to feel off but we can’t quite name why. From there, we introduce an episode of the Unapologetically Black Podcast that literally woke Tamanda up in the dead of night.

Hosted by Dr Leanne Levers and Roshan Roberts, the episode centres on friendship red flags- from love bombing and emotional over-investment, to negativity, judgement, and relationships that drain more than they give. What unfolds is an honest, funny, and sometimes uncomfortable conversation about how friendship can mirror romantic dynamics, and why so many of us end up lowering our standards when it comes to the people we call friends.

We reflect on why this episode resonated so deeply: the language it gives to experiences many people struggle to articulate, the permission it offers to reassess “ride or die” narratives, and the importance of boundaries in friendships.

This Feedwarmer is all about giving ourselves permission to name the patterns and emotional labour that seem to go unquestioned, and asking what healthier, more reciprocal friendships look like. You can see it as a taster of what’s to come in a deeper dive on friendship we’ll be dropping in 2026.

🎧 In this episode:

• Reflecting on adult friendship: unspoken discomfort and toxic patterns
• Spotlighting the Unapologetically Black Podcast and their episode on friendship
• Love bombing in friendships, and why it’s not just a dating phenomenon
• Red flags, emotional drain, and the myth of unconditional loyalty
• Rethinking friendship standards, boundaries, and reciprocity

🎧 Listen wherever you get your podcasts

🎥 Watch the full episode on YouTube

🔁 Share with someone rethinking friendships, boundaries, or emotional labour

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