Your child isn’t choosing to misbehave, their nervous system might be overriding their motivation to do the right thing in that moment. In this episode, we’re breaking down why "they know better" so often falls apart in the moment it matters most, what's actually happening in a child's brain during a meltdown or a power struggle, and why sticker charts and consequences fail when a child's nervous system has already taken the wheel.

• Why motivation isn't the problem when your child "won't" listen — and what actually is
• The difference between a fight-or-flight meltdown and a freeze/shutdown response, and why both can look like defiance
• How to shift from "won't" to "can't right now" without dropping your boundaries
• Practical, sensory-first strategies: co-regulating before correcting, catching dysregulation early, and teaching skills only once your child is calm enough to learn

Step 1: Join our free Facebook community and connect with other parents who are learning to understand behavior through a sensory and nervous system lens.

Step 2: Subscribe to the podcast for upcoming episodes in the Sensory Solutions Framework series as we continue exploring how the sensory system shapes behavior.

Step 3: This week, spend a few moments recognizing your own nervous system and regulation, especially in times when your child may be dysregulated.

💛 Related Resources:

Dr. Ross Greene: https://drrossgreene.com

There are also additional free resources on the Collaborative & Proactive Solutions (CPS) approach and the idea that "kids do well if they can." https://livesinthebalance.org

💛 Related Episodes:

Episode 10: Struggling with Your Child's Intense Meltdowns? What's Really Happening and What to Do in the Moment

Episode 13: Why Your Toddler Falls Apart After Daycare (And What to Do About It!)

Episode 22: Does Your Child Have a Behavior Problem…or a Skill Problem? The 5 Skills Behind Better Behavior that Every Parent Needs to Know

Connect on FB -> Join our Free Facebook Community

Podcast -> Sensory Solutions for Parents

Instagram -> @SensorySolutionsforParents

DISCLAIMER

This podcast, Sensory Solutions for Parents, is intended for informational and educational purposes only and is not a substitute for medical, occupational therapy, or other professional advice.

The host is a licensed occupational therapist; however, the information shared in this podcast is general in nature and may not apply to your specific child or situation. Listening to this podcast does not establish a therapist-client relationship between you and Alison Foura, PhD, OTR/L. Any strategies, ideas, or suggestions shared are offered as general support for parents and caregivers and should be used at your own discretion, with consideration for your child’s individual needs and your family’s values.

Always seek the guidance of your child’s pediatrician, occupational therapist, or other qualified healthcare provider with any questions you may have regarding your child’s development, behavior, or health.

This podcast may also include personal experiences and, at times, faith-based perspectives. These are shared as part of Alison’s personal and professional lens and are not intended to replace individualized care or professional guidance.

Step 1: Join our free Facebook community and connect with other parents who are learning to understand behavior through a sensory and nervous system lens.

Step 2: Subscribe to the podcast for upcoming episodes in the Sensory Solutions Framework series as we continue exploring how the sensory system shapes behavior.

Step 3: This week, spend a few moments recognizing your own nervous system and regulation, especially in times when your child may be dysregulated.

💛 Related Resources:

Dr. Ross Greene: https://drrossgreene.com

There are also additional free resources on the Collaborative & Proactive Solutions (CPS) approach and the idea that "kids do well if they can." https://livesinthebalance.org

💛 Related Episodes:

Episode 10: Struggling with Your Child's Intense Meltdowns? What's Really Happening and What to Do in the Moment

Episode 13: Why Your Toddler Falls Apart After Daycare (And What to Do About It!)

Episode 22: Does Your Child Have a Behavior Problem…or a Skill Problem? The 5 Skills Behind Better Behavior that Every Parent Needs to Know

Connect on FB -> Join our Free Facebook Community

Podcast -> Sensory Solutions for Parents

Instagram -> @SensorySolutionsforParents

DISCLAIMER

This podcast, Sensory Solutions for Parents, is intended for informational and educational purposes only and is not a substitute for medical, occupational therapy, or other professional advice.

The host is a licensed occupational therapist; however, the information shared in this podcast is general in nature and may not apply to your specific child or situation. Listening to this podcast does not establish a therapist-client relationship between you and Alison Foura, PhD, OTR/L. Any strategies, ideas, or suggestions shared are offered as general support for parents and caregivers and should be used at your own discretion, with consideration for your child’s individual needs and your family’s values.

Always seek the guidance of your child’s pediatrician, occupational therapist, or other qualified healthcare provider with any questions you may have regarding your child’s development, behavior, or health.

This podcast may also include personal experiences and, at times, faith-based perspectives. These are shared as part of Alison’s personal and professional lens and are not intended to replace individualized care or professional guidance.

Episode 30

Why 'Just Take a Bite' Doesn't Work for Extremely Picky Eaters (And What To Do Instead!)

Last time, we talked about why toddler picky eating is usually just development doing its job. But what about the kids who don't grow out of it — the five-food kids, the kids who gag at the sight of a new food before a bite ever happens?

In this episode, we go a layer deeper into extreme picky eating. You'll learn why eating isn't one single skill but a whole sequence of smaller skills, and why jumping straight to "just take a bite" skips many of the steps most kids haven't built yet. We'll also talk about two things that get overlooked constantly - how your child's body is positioned at the table, and the mealtime environment around them.

In this episode, you'll learn:

• Why extreme picky eating is different from typical toddler pickiness
• Why a new food can genuinely register as a threat to a child's nervous system
• Why proper seating and the right environment frees things up in your child’s body for the harder work of trying new foods
• Simple environment adjustments that reduce the sensory load at the table, without changing the food at all

The goal isn't to get your child eating everything overnight. It's to recognize that touching, smelling, or simply tolerating a new food on the plate is real progress, and that setting up their body and environment to succeed matters just as much as any food strategy.

💛 Resources Mentioned:

Link to the Nutrients article on neophobia

Dr. Kay Toomey’s SOS Approach to Feeding

💛 Next Steps: Step 1: Join our free Facebook community and connect with other parents who are learning to understand behavior through a sensory and nervous system lens. Step 2: Subscribe to the podcast for upcoming episodes. Step 3: This week, offer one new food with zero pressure to eat it — just let it sit on the plate next to something familiar, and see what happens.

💛 Related Episodes

Episode 2: Messy Play Meltdowns! Why Some Kids Struggle with Getting Their Hands Messy

Episode 8: Do mealtimes feel like you're wrangling kittens!? How positioning and body awareness impact a child's ability to sit for mealtime and what to do about it!

Episode 24: Can't Get Your Child to Calm Down? The Sensory Science Behind Co-Regulation

Episode 29: Is Your Toddler a Picky Eater? 5 Things to Try Today to Make Mealtimes Easier

💛 Connecting with Us!

Connect on FB -> Join our Free Facebook Community Podcast -> Sensory Solutions for Parents Instagram -> @SensorySolutionsforParents

DISCLAIMER

This podcast, Sensory Solutions for Parents, is intended for informational and educational purposes only and is not a substitute for medical, occupational therapy, or other professional advice.

The host is a licensed occupational therapist; however, the information shared in this podcast is general in nature and may not apply to your specific child or situation. Listening to this podcast does not establish a therapist-client relationship between you and Alison Foura, PhD, OTR/L. Any strategies, ideas, or suggestions shared are offered as general support for parents and caregivers and should be used at your own discretion, with consideration for your child's individual needs and your family's values.

Always seek the guidance of your child's pediatrician, occupational therapist, or other qualified healthcare provider with any questions you may have regarding your child's development, behavior, or health.

This podcast may also include personal experiences and, at times, faith-based perspectives. These are shared as part of Alison's personal and professional lens and are not intended to replace individualized care or professional guidance.

Episode 29

Is Mealtime a Battle with Your Picky Eater? 5 Things to Try Today to Help Make Mealtimes Easier!

Your toddler used to eat everything. Now dinner is beige, the sandwich has to be cut just right, and yesterday's favorite food is suddenly "yucky." If mealtimes have turned into a nightly battle, you're not imagining it — and you didn't cause it.

In this episode we’re talking about why toddlers get so “picky” with their eating and why this is one of the most normal, predictable stages of development. We’ll also discuss what's typical picky eating vs. what's worth mentioning to your pediatrician, why pressuring your toddler to "just try one bite" almost always backfires and 5 practical strategies you can start using at tonight's dinner!

The goal isn't to win every meal. It's to keep food a calm, low-pressure part of your toddler's day, so curiosity has room to grow over time.

💛 Resources Mentioned:

Link to the Nutrients article on neophobia

💛 Next Steps: Step 1: Join our free Facebook community and connect with other parents who are learning to understand behavior through a sensory and nervous system lens. Step 2: Subscribe to the podcast for upcoming episodes. Step 3: This week, offer one new food with zero pressure to eat it — just let it sit on the plate next to something familiar, and see what happens.

💛 Related Episodes Episode 2: Messy Play Meltdowns! Why Some Kids Struggle with Getting Their Hands Messy

Episode 8: Do mealtimes feel like you're wrangling kittens!? How positioning and body awareness impact a child's ability to sit for mealtime and what to do about it!

Episode 24: Can't Get Your Child to Calm Down? The Sensory Science Behind Co-Regulation

💛 Connecting with Us! Connect on FB -> Join our Free Facebook Community Podcast -> Sensory Solutions for Parents Instagram -> @SensorySolutionsforParents

DISCLAIMER

This podcast, Sensory Solutions for Parents, is intended for informational and educational purposes only and is not a substitute for medical, occupational therapy, or other professional advice.

The host is a licensed occupational therapist; however, the information shared in this podcast is general in nature and may not apply to your specific child or situation. Listening to this podcast does not establish a therapist-client relationship between you and Alison Foura, PhD, OTR/L. Any strategies, ideas, or suggestions shared are offered as general support for parents and caregivers and should be used at your own discretion, with consideration for your child's individual needs and your family's values.

Always seek the guidance of your child's pediatrician, occupational therapist, or other qualified healthcare provider with any questions you may have regarding your child's development, behavior, or health.

This podcast may also include personal experiences and, at times, faith-based perspectives. These are shared as part of Alison's personal and professional lens and are not intended to replace individualized care or professional guidance.

Episode 28

Is My Child a Sensory Seeker or a Sensory Avoider? How to Tell the Difference and Why Most Kids are BOTH!

Understanding whether your child is a sensory seeker, a sensory avoider, or a mix of both is one of the most useful tools you can have as a parent — because it changes everything about which strategies will actually help.

In this episode, we're breaking down what sensory seeking and sensory avoiding really look like day to day, why your child might be both depending on the type of input or the time of day, and how to start noticing these patterns in your own home.

In this episode, you'll learn:

• What sensory seeking actually looks like — crashing, jumping, chewing, touching everything, needing constant movement
• What sensory avoiding actually looks like — covering ears, avoiding messy play, selective/picky eating, resisting touch or certain fabrics
• Why your child can be a seeker for one type of input and an avoider for another, all at the same time
• Why the same child might seek input on some days and avoid it on others, depending on their nervous system's capacity that day
• How knowing your child's pattern helps you choose strategies that actually work, instead of guessing
• Why "too much" and "too little" can look identical from the outside, even though your child needs the opposite response

The goal isn't to put your child in a permanent box labeled "seeker" or "avoider." It's to start noticing their patterns so you can respond to what their nervous system actually needs, in that moment — not what worked yesterday, or what worked for someone else's child.

💛 Next Steps: Step 1: Join our free Facebook community and connect with other parents who are learning to understand behavior through a sensory and nervous system lens. Step 2: Subscribe to the podcast for upcoming episodes. Step 3: This week, notice one seeking behavior and one avoiding behavior in your child — you may be surprised to find both.

💛 Related Episode

Episode 2: Struggling to understand all of this sensory stuff? Breaking it down into every day language

Episode 10: Struggling With Your Child’s Intense Meltdowns? What’s Really Happening and What to Do in the Moment

Episode 11: Curious About Why Your Child Plays the Way They Do? Understanding Their Sensory Needs Through Play

Episode 21: Got a Kiddo Who Just Won’t Stop Moving?! What Proprioception Is and Why It Matters for Your Child’s Behavior

Episode 23: Do Your Child's Big Emotions and Meltdowns Leave You Feeling Confused? Understanding Why Behavior Makes Sense Through Regulation and Dysregulation

Episode 24: Can’t Get Your Child to Calm Down? The Sensory Science Behind Co-Regulation

💛 Connecting with Us! Connect on FB -> Join our Free Facebook Community Podcast -> Sensory Solutions for Parents Instagram -> @SensorySolutionsforParents

DISCLAIMER This podcast, Sensory Solutions for Parents, is intended for informational and educational purposes only and is not a substitute for medical, occupational therapy, or other professional advice.

The host is a licensed occupational therapist; however, the information shared in this podcast is general in nature and may not apply to your specific child or situation. Listening to this podcast does not establish a therapist-client relationship between you and Alison Foura, PhD, OTR/L. Any strategies, ideas, or suggestions shared are offered as general support for parents and caregivers and should be used at your own discretion, with consideration for your child's individual needs and your family's values.

Always seek the guidance of your child's pediatrician, occupational therapist, or other qualified healthcare provider with any questions you may have regarding your child's development, behavior, or health.

This podcast may also include personal experiences and, at times, faith-based perspectives. These are shared as part of Alison's personal and professional lens and are not intended to replace individualized care or professional guidance.

Episode 27:

Is It Sensory or Behavior? Why That's the Wrong Question to Ask for Your Child’s Meltdown!

"Is this sensory... or is this behavior?" It's one of the most common questions parents, grandparents and teachers ask when a child melts down. We want a label - sensory or behavior - because we think the label tells us what to do next.

In this episode, we're challenging the question itself. Because sensory processing isn't a separate category from behavior – it’s what’s underneath it all! All behavior has a sensory or nervous system root, and once you see it that way, so much of what looked like "bad behavior" starts to make sense.

In this episode, you'll learn:

• Why sensory processing isn't a separate category from behavior
• The one mindset shift that changes how you respond to nearly every difficult moment
• Why we instinctively sort behavior into "sensory" (deserving compassion) vs. "behavior" (deserving correction) - and why that split doesn't reflect what's actually happening in your child's body
• How this shows up in real moments: the grocery store meltdown, the shoe-refusal standoff, hitting a sibling, amongst many others!
• Why holding a boundary and staying curious about the nervous system underneath it aren't in conflict

The goal isn't to sort every behavior into the right category. It's to understand what your child's behavior may be communicating, and get curious instead of frustrated, because curiosity almost always leads to better solutions.

💛 Next Steps:

Step 1: Join our free Facebook community and connect with other parents who are learning to understand behavior through a sensory and nervous system lens. Step 2: Subscribe to the podcast for upcoming episodes. Step 3: This week, next time you catch yourself asking "is this sensory or behavior," try asking instead: what is my child's nervous system trying to tell me?

💛 Related Episodes

Episode 13: Why Your Toddler Falls Apart After Daycare (And What to Do About It!)

Episode 10: Struggling With Your Child's Intense Meltdowns? What's Really Happening and What to Do in the Moment

Episode 22: Does Your Child Have a Behavior Problem…or a Skill Problem? The 5 Skills Behind Better Behavior that Every Parent Needs to Know

Episode 25 Calming Strategies Never Work for My Child! How to Find the Sensory Input They Actually Need

💛 Connecting with Us!

Connect on FB -> Join our Free Facebook Community Podcast -> Sensory Solutions for Parents Instagram -> @SensorySolutionsforParents

DISCLAIMER

This podcast, Sensory Solutions for Parents, is intended for informational and educational purposes only and is not a substitute for medical, occupational therapy, or other professional advice.

The host is a licensed occupational therapist; however, the information shared in this podcast is general in nature and may not apply to your specific child or situation. Listening to this podcast does not establish a therapist-client relationship between you and Alison Foura, PhD, OTR/L. Any strategies, ideas, or suggestions shared are offered as general support for parents and caregivers and should be used at your own discretion, with consideration for your child’s individual needs and your family’s values.

Always seek the guidance of your child’s pediatrician, occupational therapist, or other qualified healthcare provider with any questions you may have regarding your child’s development, behavior, or health.

This podcast may also include personal experiences and, at times, faith-based perspectives. These are shared as part of Alison’s personal and professional lens and are not intended to replace individualized care or professional guidance.

Back-to-school can be exciting, but it can also mean more stress for your child – and you! More noise, more transitions, more demands, and a whole lot more sensory information to process.

If your child is struggling with the morning routine, having a hard time with drop-off, constantly moving after school, eating less at school, or completely falling apart when they get home, their nervous system may simply be working overtime to adjust.

In this episode we're talking about how much the back to school transition can affect your child's sensory system and 5 simple strategies you can start using right away to make the transition easier.

• Why the morning rush can overwhelm your child's sensory system before school even starts
• How creating a predictable morning and drop-off routine can make transitions easier
• Why some kids actually need more movement, not less, to stay focused
• How the cafeteria can affect your child's eating
• Why your child may hold it together at school and completely fall apart at home
• How to create a simple after-school "landing place" to help your child decompress

The goal isn't to eliminate every difficult moment or create a perfectly calm child. It's to understand what your child's behavior may be communicating and make small changes that help their nervous system manage the demands of the school day.

Step 1: Join our free Facebook community and connect with other parents who are learning to understand behavior through a sensory and nervous system lens.

Step 2: Subscribe to the podcast for upcoming episodes.

Step 3: This week, spend a few moments recognizing your own nervous system and regulation, especially in times when your child may be dysregulated.

💛 Related Episode

Episode 13: Why Your Toddler Falls Apart After Daycare (And What to Do About It!)

Episode 10: Struggling With Your Child's Intense Meltdowns? What's Really Happening and What to Do in the Moment

Episode 21: Got a Kiddo Who Just Won’t Stop Moving?! What Proprioception Is and Why It Matters for Your Child’s Behavior

Episode 24: Can’t Get Your Child to Calm Down? The Sensory Science Behind Co-Regulation

Connect on FB -> Join our Free Facebook Community

Podcast -> Sensory Solutions for Parents

Instagram -> @SensorySolutionsforParents

DISCLAIMER

This podcast, Sensory Solutions for Parents, is intended for informational and educational purposes only and is not a substitute for medical, occupational therapy, or other professional advice.

The host is a licensed occupational therapist; however, the information shared in this podcast is general in nature and may not apply to your specific child or situation. Listening to this podcast does not establish a therapist-client relationship between you and Alison Foura, PhD, OTR/L. Any strategies, ideas, or suggestions shared are offered as general support for parents and caregivers and should be used at your own discretion, with consideration for your child’s individual needs and your family’s values.

Always seek the guidance of your child’s pediatrician, occupational therapist, or other qualified healthcare provider with any questions you may have regarding your child’s development, behavior, or health.

This podcast may also include personal experiences and, at times, faith-based perspectives. These are shared as part of Alison’s personal and professional lens and are not intended to replace individualized care or professional guidance.

Episode 25:

Calming Strategies Never Work for My Child! How to Find the Sensory Input They Actually Need

Have you tried deep breathing, a calm-down corner, sensory toys, or other calming strategies with your child…only to feel like nothing actually works?

Here's the thing: your child may not always need to calm down. Their nervous system may need more sensory input, less sensory input, or a completely different type of sensory input.

In today's episode of Sensory Solutions for Parents, we're talking about how to become a sensory detective and start looking beyond your child's behavior to figure out what their nervous system may actually be communicating.

The goal isn't simply to make our children's bodies look calm. It's to understand what their sensory systems and nervous system needs to help them feel more organized, comfortable, and ready to participate.

Because the behavior gives us a ton of information - and when we get curious about what's happening underneath that behavior, we can choose strategies that better match what our children actually need!

Step 1: Join our free Facebook community and connect with other parents who are learning to understand behavior through a sensory and nervous system lens.

Step 2: Subscribe to the podcast for upcoming episodes in the Sensory Solutions Framework series as we continue exploring how the sensory system shapes behavior.

Step 3: This week, spend a few moments recognizing your own nervous system and regulation, especially in times when your child may be dysregulated.

💛 Related Episode

Episode 2: Struggling to understand all of this sensory stuff? Breaking it down into every day language

Episode 10: Struggling With Your Child’s Intense Meltdowns? What’s Really Happening and What to Do in the Moment

Episode 11: Curious About Why Your Child Plays the Way They Do? Understanding Their Sensory Needs Through Play

Episode 21: Got a Kiddo Who Just Won’t Stop Moving?! What Proprioception Is and Why It Matters for Your Child’s Behavior

Episode 23: Do Your Child's Big Emotions and Meltdowns Leave You Feeling Confused? Understanding Why Behavior Makes Sense Through Regulation and Dysregulation

Episode 24: Can’t Get Your Child to Calm Down? The Sensory Science Behind Co-Regulation

Connect on FB -> Join our Free Facebook Community

Podcast -> Sensory Solutions for Parents

Instagram -> @SensorySolutionsforParents

DISCLAIMER

This podcast, Sensory Solutions for Parents, is intended for informational and educational purposes only and is not a substitute for medical, occupational therapy, or other professional advice.

The host is a licensed occupational therapist; however, the information shared in this podcast is general in nature and may not apply to your specific child or situation. Listening to this podcast does not establish a therapist-client relationship between you and Alison Foura, PhD, OTR/L. Any strategies, ideas, or suggestions shared are offered as general support for parents and caregivers and should be used at your own discretion, with consideration for your child’s individual needs and your family’s values.

Always seek the guidance of your child’s pediatrician, occupational therapist, or other qualified healthcare provider with any questions you may have regarding your child’s development, behavior, or health.

This podcast may also include personal experiences and, at times, faith-based perspectives. These are shared as part of Alison’s personal and professional lens and are not intended to replace individualized care or professional guidance.