Dave and Paul are back for Season 2, Episode 3, and this week kicks off with possibly the least football related opening in the show's history.

Before a ball is kicked, the lads go to war over toilet paper (over or under), whether you sit or stand to do your business, and the now infamous Hyrox poo saga that has to be heard to be believed. Dave is horrified. Paul is defending the indefensible. Standard.

Then the football arrives, and it is all about the Manchester derby. Ten-man City beat United, and there are no excuses. The boys thrash out the Foden red card, the Bruno Fernandes simulation question, the offside goal the refs later admitted was wrong, and whether VAR consistency is just a pipe dream. That spills into the big one: with United this bad, are they even the biggest club in Manchester anymore, let alone England?

Elsewhere, Arsenal are the real deal even if Dave reckons watching them is like a UFC fighter grinding out a submission. Paul makes his case for Xabi Alonso's Chelsea as a work in progress, Dave defends Iraola's Liverpool through a rough patch and a brutal 100 million pound flop debate, and Spurs keep another clean sheet while forgetting how to score. Plus a quickfire yes or no round, the Carrick sack watch, and a definitive ruling on "have your cake and eat it too."

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.