The FBI is lowering hiring standards to allow anyone who's engaged in bestiality. Yep. You heard that right. But that's not the worst thing that's happened. The Kennedy Center can't have you-know-who's name on it so it must be torn down apparently. Speaking of petulance, an Epstein alumnus and pro football team owner has a hissy fit over comments so we're all forced to discuss Ed Sheeran vs. Macklemore vs. the world of "both sides"-ism. Psst: CHECK YOUR VOTER REGISTRATION REGULARLY because the biggest clowns in the biggest circus could whip up some dirty tricks for November!

It's one of those episodes where you start out remembering, reflecting and trying to make sense of the world and somehow end up wondering whether Fort Knox became Fort Knocked Off when we weren't looking.

There's nostalgia, Halloween outrage, convention absurdity, a little existential dread, and the growing realization that maybe the biggest problem isn't that reality has gone off the rails but that nobody seems to know where the rails are anymore.

Come have a Rant with us.

What happens when you look back at COVID and think, "Honestly, not that bad?" Remember when a president wearing a tan suit was considered a scandal? Yeah. We'd like those problems back, please.

Meanwhile, Dallas is preparing for a presidential visit with enough security to guarantee it won't be reimbursed by the RNC for the cost. There's also a giant monument-sized ego project looming over the landscape in D.C., surveillance cameras watching more than anybody asked them to, and a growing concern that some of the progress we thought was permanent really isn't.

So, basically: everything is fine.
Except it really, really isn't.