Content note: This episode contains discussion of addiction, overdose, assault, suicidal ideation, homelessness, and other traumatic experiences. Please take care while listening.

Alyssa Jarvis joins us to talk about faith, rejection, trauma, addiction, recovery, forgiveness, and the long road to building a new life. This is a heavy one, but it’s also full of honesty, resilience, and hope.

Special thanks to our sponsors:

McKelvey Insurance Group

https://mckelveyins.com

Light Source Psychotherapy

http://findyourlightsource.com

Chapters

00:00 Introduction and Sponsorships

01:33 Personal Stories and Connections

02:59 Faith and Spiritual Journeys

06:06 Navigating Identity and Acceptance

11:56 Challenges of Homelessness and Addiction

20:00 Support Systems and Resilience

21:17 Navigating Adolescence and School Challenges

22:14 The Role of Xanax in Coping with Trauma

25:00 Understanding Addiction and Recovery

27:06 The Impact of Loss on Substance Use

33:15 The Journey of Forgiveness and Healing

46:29 The Drugging Incident

49:21 The Aftermath of Assault

50:46 Realizations and Consequences

51:05 First Treatment Experience

53:39 Escalation of Addiction

54:30 Overdoses and Near-Death Experiences

56:18 Friendship and Betrayal

01:01:10 Rock Bottom and Awakening

01:11:25 The Call for Help

01:14:02 Journey to Treatment

01:17:00 Entering Recovery

01:20:30 Finding Purpose in Pain

01:24:29 Navigating Relationships in Recovery

01:30:05 The Challenges of Motherhood

01:34:38 The Birth Experience

01:35:23 The Birth of Harley and Early Challenges

01:38:01 Navigating Single Parenthood

01:39:29 Finding Stability and Employment

01:41:41 The Journey to Recovery and New Beginnings

01:45:03 Building Community and Support

01:49:01 Spiritual Growth and Connection

01:57:06 Empowering Others Through Experience

John Nettles joins Pondoff’s Anonymous for a real conversation about addiction, relapse, treatment, and what it actually takes to build a life that lasts. Originally from the St. Louis area and now living in California, John talks about growing up in Chesterfield, getting pulled into sports, nightlife, and the EDM scene, and how alcohol and drugs slowly took over everything.

This episode gets into the messy reality of addiction...the false starts, the treatment attempts that didn’t stick, the consequences, and the slow shift from just surviving to actually changing. John also opens up about the recovery community that helped him, the grief and relationships he’s had to navigate sober, and what it means to find purpose after years of chaos.

John is the Director of Alumni Relations at Refine Recovery in Sherman Oaks, California, where he helped build the alumni program to keep people connected and supported after treatment. He also hosts his own podcast, Recovery Refined, where he talks with guests about recovery, identity, adversity, and growth.

If you’re in California and need help, check out Refine Recovery:

https://refinerecovery.com/contact/

Check out John’s podcast, Recovery Refined:

https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/recovery-refined/id1867828182

Sponsors:

A big thank you to our sponsors. We couldn’t do this without them.

McKelvey Insurance Group

https://www.mckelveyins.com/

Light Source

https://findyourlightsource.com/

Timestamps:

00:00 Introduction and Sponsorships

04:57 California's Treatment Landscape

11:06 Community Support and Recovery Initiatives

20:00 Growing Up in Chesterfield and Sports Background

25:19 Sports Culture and Personal Anecdotes

29:43 The Journey into Addiction

30:51 Treatment Programs and Their Impact

34:15 Navigating Recovery and Relapse

39:09 Building a Supportive Recovery Community

44:37 Comedy Night and Personal Reflections

46:11 Navigating Family Dynamics and Addiction

47:47 The Struggles of Early Adulthood and Substance Use

49:31 The Intersection of Substance Use and Nightlife

51:27 Geographic Changes and Their Impact on Addiction

54:43 The Escalation of Addiction and Its Consequences

57:27 The Turning Point: Realizations and Relationships

01:00:00 The Journey to Sobriety and Its Challenges

01:02:51 Facing the Consequences of Addiction

01:05:18 The Cycle of Sobriety and Relapse

01:10:03 Societal Views on Alcohol and Addiction

01:13:20 Moments of Willingness and Seeking Help

01:19:06 The Impact of Family and Relationships on Recovery

01:22:43 Reconnecting and Building Relationships

01:25:11 The Role of Pets in Recovery

01:30:02 The Journey to Treatment

01:31:03 Listening and Learning in Recovery

01:35:24 Detox and the Importance of Time

01:39:02 Finding Purpose in Recovery

01:45:39 Working in Treatment and Helping Others

01:46:37 Building Trust in Recovery

01:47:01 Creating a Supportive Alumni Network

01:48:50 The Importance of Community in Recovery

01:51:26 Navigating Grief and Loss

01:56:00 Finding Purpose in Service

02:00:05 Understanding Addiction and Recovery

02:02:12 Connecting Through Shared Experiences

Never Lose Hope with Tennille Heitkamp

Tennille Heitkamp joins Pondoff’s Anonymous to share the long, painful, and hopeful story of walking through addiction with her son, Jacob. What starts as a conversation about Underground and finding the right support community turns into a brutally honest look at what addiction does to an entire family.

Tennille talks about Jacob’s childhood, ADHD, early struggles to fit in, his exposure to pills and fentanyl, emergency room visits, detox, sober living, relapse, and the emotional chaos that came with trying to keep him alive. She also opens up about the toll it took on her, her marriage, her other son, and her own mental health as she tried to hold everything together.

But this episode is not just about the darkness. It is also about not giving up. Tennille shares how Jacob eventually found real help, how Florida became a turning point, how he is now six months sober, and how hope slowly started to return. The conversation also highlights Tennille’s work with Addiction is Real, where she now helps other families recognize warning signs, find resources, and feel less alone.

This episode is for parents, loved ones, and anyone who has ever felt exhausted by addiction and wondered if things can still get better.

Sponsored by:

McKelvey Insurance Group — https://www.mckelveyins.com

LightSource Psychotherapy — https://findyourlightsource.com

00:00 Sponsor message: McKelvey Insurance Group + LightSource

00:56 Theme song

01:30 Welcome and meeting Tennille

06:48 How Tennille found Underground

09:16 Trying different support spaces until something fits

12:12 Creating a safe place for scared newcomers

15:27 Underground becomes bigger than anyone expected

17:42 Why Chris wanted Tennille to tell this story

18:43 Jacob, Jayden, and the beginning of the family story

24:02 Jacob’s childhood, diagnoses, surgeries, and early struggles

30:38 High school football, wanting to fit in, and pills

32:16 First exposure to fentanyl

33:34 Moving out, chasing belonging, and things unraveling

40:12 The first major fentanyl scare and ER trip

42:09 Detox, sober living, and the insurance nightmare

58:30 Family disease, shame, and trying to fix everything

1:01:33 Learning boundaries and finding family support

1:21:08 Another sober living setback

1:25:39 Airport chaos and getting Jacob back to treatment

1:30:54 New Jersey, sober living, and another return home

1:33:21 A good stretch, then relapse again

1:37:05 Hospital scare and the move to Florida

1:38:05 Florida treatment and meeting Emily

1:40:21 Six months sober and a different future

1:42:48 Tennille’s work with Addiction is Real

1:50:39 How Jacob is doing now

1:53:55 Credits

1:54:26 Light in the Dark coffee outro