A lot of men don’t think they have a problem with intimacy. They just feel a bit distant. A bit shut down. Less connected than they used to be to their partner, to sex, or to themselves. This episode goes right into that space.

I’m joined by Dr. Dan Sneider. Dan is a therapist; however, this isn’t a lecture or a list of techniques. It’s a conversation grounded in his own lived experience and how he learned early on to shut parts of himself down, how that showed up in his relationships, and what it actually took for him to stay present instead of withdrawing when things got uncomfortable.

We talk about how intimacy doesn’t usually disappear overnight. It fades quietly. How many men default to pulling away rather than risking saying the wrong thing. And how habits that look like “sex issues” are often really about safety, control, and not knowing how to stay emotionally exposed without feeling weak or overwhelmed.

Dan shares what he’s learned, first in his own life, then through years of working alongside men, including:

• why emotional closeness can feel threatening, even in good relationships
• how shame and self-protection show up as silence, distraction, or distance
• why midlife often brings intimacy problems to the surface
• and how connection starts with honesty, not performance or confidence

This episode is for men who care about their relationships but don’t always know how to talk about what’s going on inside them. Men who haven’t “checked out”, but who feel something has shifted and don’t want to lose what matters.

It’s not about fixing yourself. It’s about understanding why intimacy feels hard and what actually helps.

If you want to find out more about Dan’s work, visit his website where you can also download his free guide: https://www.growthandgratitudetherapy.com/the-intimacy-shift.

In this episode, I’m joined by Michael Rice, a bioarchitect and the founder of Mentorus. Michael approaches men’s lives the same way he approaches buildings: by looking at foundations, structure, and whether what’s been built is actually fit for purpose. After years designing physical spaces, his work now focuses on helping men understand why a life that looks solid on the outside can quietly stop working from within, and how to rebuild it with intention, clarity, and honesty.

We talk about what happens when the life you’ve constructed no longer fits who you are, and how midlife often reveals this not as a crisis, but as a structural problem that can be understood, and changed.

A key part of this conversation is about the four archetypal parts that operate inside most men, whether we’re conscious of them or not, and what it looks like when they’re missing or out of balance in everyday life:

• the part of you that takes responsibility but ends up carrying everything alone;
• the part of you that should set boundaries but stays silent or explodes;
• the part of you that thinks constantly but feels stuck and overwhelmed;
• the part of you that wants closeness, joy, and connection but feels switched off.

We talk about how midlife often exposes these fractures, and why that’s not a failure, but a signal.

Most importantly, this isn’t a conversation that stays in theory. Michael shares simple, practical ways men can start changing things without quitting their job, blowing up their family, or pretending everything is fine.

This episode is for men who feel:

• unfulfilled and continuing down the wrong path in life;
• disconnected from themselves or the people they care about;
• unsure how to find a way forward to the life they want.

About MENTORUS

In a world where information and knowledge are readily available and accessible, the commodity and quality of Wisdom becomes increasingly difficult to procure and purpose. The unstable landscape of perception and cognition is cluttered and difficult to navigate. Without Truth as our compass, we either stall and forget, or stumble onwards, blind to our inner flame, reacting, rather than creating.

Mentorus provides a Map and the wisdom to read it. It invites the courageous man to dive deep into his true nature, developing contextual awareness of the myriad machinations and meanings of this copy realm, and, most importantly, his role within it. It guides him on a Journey of re-discovery and re-memberance; providing inspiration, insight and illumination - stimulating a powerful impulse to upheave and burn away the accumulated programs, beliefs, and limits, imposed and assumed, and affords him the strength to explore and express his true essence and creative power.

To contact Michael, email him @ 13mentorus@gmail.com.

In this episode, we talk to Mordy Gottlieb, a men’s therapist whose work - and life - has been shaped by one quiet, corrosive belief: “Whatever I do, it’s never enough.”

Mordy shares how perfection became his survival strategy as a child and how striving without self-compassion led to years of numbing, self-criticism, and chasing relief through behaviours that slowly escalated rather than resolved the pain.

What makes this conversation different is its honesty about how these patterns actually form, starting with food, moving into pornography and other forms of escape, and eventually colliding with midlife reality when effort stops working, and avoidance stops providing relief.

Rather than framing men’s behaviours as addictions or failures, Mordy explains them as attempts to regulate unbearable internal pressure and why insight alone rarely changes anything. The real shift, he argues, comes through experience, practice, and safe connection, especially with other men.

This episode also challenges some uncomfortable truths: why being “strong” often means being emotionally absent, why vulnerability isn’t just talking, and why many men feel unseen even inside long-term relationships they’ve spent years sustaining.

In this episode, you’ll hear about:

• How the belief “I’m never enough” gets wired into boys early on
• Why perfectionism feels productive but leads to exhaustion and shame
• How numbing behaviours escalate quietly over time
• Why midlife is often the moment men can’t outrun themselves anymore
• The limits of talk therapy and why knowing why isn’t the same as changing
• How experiential therapy helps men rehearse real-world change
• Why men often heal faster in groups than one-to-one
• What vulnerability actually looks like in daily life (including learning to say no)
• Small, realistic ways to introduce play, presence, and self-permission back into life

Why this episode matters:
Because if you’ve ever felt that no matter how much you give - at work, at home, in relationships - it’s still not enough, this conversation will feel uncomfortably familiar. Mordy doesn’t offer fixes or slogans. He offers language for something many men have lived with for decades without naming.

To find out more Mordy, visit his website: www.thegamechangergroup.com.

What happens to a man when he loses his father and no one shows him how to grieve?

In this honest, darkly funny, and deeply human conversation, we hear from John Colbert, a writer and former advertising creative who turned the loss of his father to prostate cancer into Damaged Goods, a memoir made up of short, sharply observed stories about grief, masculinity, mental health, and what happens long after the funeral ends.

John was just 20 when his father died after a six-year illness. What followed was a period of profound depression, emotional shutdown, and learning - painfully - that men are rarely taught how to process loss. In a culture that rewards silence and “being strong,” John found himself unable to talk about what he was feeling, even in therapy, until things reached a breaking point.

What makes this episode powerful is John’s willingness to speak plainly about what many men experience but rarely admit: the loneliness after the support fades, the quiet house, the first Christmas without a parent, the guilt, the anger, and the long shadow grief can cast across identity, relationships, and adulthood.

Rather than avoiding the darkness, John meets it with humour; not to trivialise loss, but to survive it. His writing and perspective show how laughter, honesty, and connection can unlock conversations that grief shuts down.

In this episode, you’ll hear about:

• Why many men are never taught how to grieve, and the cost of burying it
• How losing a parent can force an early and painful “arrival” into adulthood
• Depression, suicidal thoughts, and the moment therapy finally began to work
• Why humour can be a powerful survival tool in grief
• How grief reshapes identity, relationships, and masculinity over decades
• The long tail of loss and why it doesn’t end after the funeral
• Why connection, not isolation, is what actually helps men heal
• The importance of men’s health awareness, prostate checks, and breaking taboos
• What midlife men can do if they’re carrying unprocessed grief right now

Why you should listen:
Because if you’ve lost a parent - recently or years ago - and quietly carried on, this episode will feel uncomfortably familiar. John puts words to experiences many men recognise but rarely voice, offering permission to laugh, talk, remember, and connect without shame.

This is not an episode about “getting over” grief. It’s about living with it honestly, imperfectly, and with other people around you.

If you want to find out more about John, visit his website https://www.itscolbert.com, and his book Damaged Goods is available on Amazon, Barnes and Noble, and through other online retailers.

What do you do when you look in the mirror and no longer recognise the man staring back? When the weight you’re carrying - physically and mentally - feels impossible to shift?

In this powerful and frank conversation, we speak with Jonathan Boulware, a man who went from years of obesity, shame, and hopelessness to completely transforming his life, but not through fad diets or quick fixes, but by rebuilding his mindset, his habits, and his sense of self.

Jonathan shares the story of losing his mother to obesity, the moment he realised his own health was spiralling, and the emotional breaking point where he decided something had to change. What he discovered wasn’t a perfect fitness plan; it was a deeper truth: the body follows the mind.

His journey led him to become a certified personal trainer, health coach, behavioural change specialist, and author. But what makes his voice essential is his lived experience, knowing exactly what it feels like to be overwhelmed, ashamed, stuck, and convinced that change is impossible.

In this episode, you’ll learn:

• Why the real battle isn’t losing weight, it’s rebuilding your belief in yourself.
• How hopelessness develops, and how to break out of it.
• Jonathan’s approach to self-compassion, identity, and sustainable change.
• Why motivation isn’t the answer, and what actually keeps you going.
• How to set goals that fit into real life, with work, kids, stress, and pressure.
• What to do when you fall off the wagon and how to get back on track without shame.
• Why community and the right support matter more than willpower.
• The truth about weight-loss drugs and why lasting change still depends on mindset.

Why listen:
Because so many men live in silence with the same feelings Jonathan describes: failure, frustration, shame, and the belief that it’s too late. His story proves it isn’t. This conversation is about more than weight, it’s about taking back control, rebuilding confidence, and remembering that you are capable of far more than you think.

If you want to find out more about Jonathan, his work, and his book Take Control of Your Body (Before It Takes Control of You), visit his website: https://www.youcanbeatobesity.com.

In this episode, I’m joined by Dr. Brian Livesay, a trauma therapist and Director of Clinical Research at Arise Alliance, and we explore how men can heal from unspoken trauma, not by suppressing or avoiding it, but by facing it differently.

Drawing from his personal story of loss, military service, and years working with veterans and first responders, Brian introduces a groundbreaking approach to healing called Critical Memory Integration (CMI). It’s a way of helping people re-engage with their most painful memories from a place of safety, strength, and agency, transforming how those experiences live within them.

We unpack why so many men stay silent about pain, how disconnection shows up in everyday life, and what it really means to face your demons, without being destroyed by them.

You’ll learn:

• Why men often disconnect emotionally and how it affects relationships, work, and health.
• What Critical Memory Integration is and how it helps rewire trauma at its source.
• How unprocessed memories show up as anger, anxiety, or emotional shutdown.
• Why facing pain is a path to strength, not weakness.
• Practical first steps to reconnect with yourself and others, even when you feel stuck.

Why listen:
If you’ve ever felt haunted by something you can’t quite name or sensed that your emotions are running the show, this episode offers a roadmap back to calm, clarity, and connection. Brian’s insight bridges science, story, and soul, reminding us that courage isn’t the absence of pain, it’s learning how to walk through it.

If you want to find out more about Brian and his work with Critical Memory Intergration, visit the Arise Alliance website.

What happens when the work stops, the job title is no longer relevant, and the role that defined you disappears?

In this episode, Nick Shelton tells the story so many midlife men silently live: achieving everything you thought you wanted… only to find yourself fading, drifting, or feeling strangely empty once the structure and purpose of working life falls away.

Nick retired young, thinking it would feel like freedom. Instead, it felt like slowly disappearing, like waking up one day and realising the man you were has nowhere to go and nothing to do.

This episode is about what happens next.

It’s about not losing yourself when life changes and about the courage it takes to create a second life, one built on meaning, curiosity, relationships, and identity, not just achievement.

Most importantly, it’s about the truth midlife men rarely hear: you’re allowed to reinvent yourself. You’re allowed to want something different. You don’t have to stay who you’ve always been.

What You’ll Learn

• Why so many men feel lost after retirement or a career shift, and why no one talks about it.
• How identity becomes wrapped around work, status, and achievement. often without us noticing.
• The emotional crash that happens when the job ends, even when it’s a choice.
• Why “freedom” can feel frightening or empty if you don’t have a new purpose.
• Nick’s practical “Reset Button” framework for reinventing yourself step by step.
• How to rediscover passions, confidence, and agency after years of routine.
• Why you don’t have to keep doing the same job just because you’ve always done it.
• The difference between finding your purpose and revealing it.
• How to move from the achievement phase of life to the impact, connection, and meaning phase.
• Why you are never too old to start again, and why reinvention is an option at any age.

Why Men Should Listen

Because Nick’s story answers the midlife question men avoid the most: “If I’m not my job anymore… who am I?”

Whether you’re thinking about retirement, feeling stuck in the same role, quietly burning out, or just sensing that life is shifting beneath your feet, Nick puts words to the feelings men rarely voice:

• “I thought I’d be happy, but I felt like I was disappearing.”
• “Everyone thought I was fine, but I wasn’t.”
• “No one taught us how to start again.”

His honesty is the bridge that helps men realise they’re not alone, not weak, and not broken; they’re just at a crossroads no one prepared them for.

This episode permits men to rethink everything: career, identity, purpose, direction, and even the shape of their everyday lives. And it offers a practical system for stepping into a life that actually fits who they are now, not who they used to be.

Nick brings humour, honesty, and humility to a conversation many men desperately need but rarely have.

His story is your story just told aloud.

If you want to find out more about Nick and his work, visit his website: resettheman.com, and you can also find him on LinkedIn as Nick Shelton.

His book, “An Introvert's Guide to World Domination,” is available to buy on Amazon and through other online retailers.

What if midlife wasn’t the beginning of decline, but a second chance to feel alive again?

In this episode, my guest is Louis Bezich, men’s health advocate, and author of Saving Men from Themselves. After years of juggling leadership, divorce, and single parenthood, Louis discovered that taking care of himself wasn’t selfish - it was survival.

Louis shares how purpose, relationships, and everyday rituals can transform men’s health, longevity, and happiness. He speaks honestly about the lies we tell ourselves (“I’m fine”), the habits that hold us back, and the simple mindset shift that can reignite motivation, no matter how stuck or tired you feel.

You’ll hear about:

• How to turn life’s setbacks, such as divorce, stress, and even loneliness, into fuel for growth.
• Why men’s health isn’t just about diet or exercise, but meaning and connection.
• The “provider and protector” myth that keeps so many of us from looking after ourselves.
• How brotherhood and belonging can literally help you live longer.
• Why it’s never too late to start living healthy and feeling good again.

This isn’t a pep talk; it’s a practical, heartfelt reminder that you still have time to become the man you want to be.

Why You Should Listen

Because most of us know we should look after ourselves, we just don’t know where to start, or how to stay motivated when life feels like one long list of responsibilities. Louis strips away the noise and shows that better health and connection aren’t about perfection; they’re about purpose, small routines, and remembering that others depend on us too.

If you want to find out more about Louis and his work visit his website: https://louisbezich.com/. His book, “Saving Men from Themselves: 20 Proven Tactics With a New Approach to Living Healthy for Men Over 50,” is available to buy on Bookbay and through other online retailers.