What does it really mean to be financially independent—and how much control are women giving up without even realizing it?

Financial expert, attorney, former banking executive and Never Date a Broke Dude author Pattie Ehsaei joins me for a sharp, funny and unapologetic conversation about money, marriage, power and the financial decisions that can shape a woman’s future.

We get into the difference between looking wealthy and actually building wealth, why money can quietly become leverage inside a relationship, the complicated reality of prenups, financial dependence, retirement, and why even smart, successful women can have major blind spots when it comes to their own finances.

And because Pattie never misses a good pop-culture money lesson, we also break down what the very public relationship splits of Dorit Kemsley and PK Kemsley, Lisa and Lenny Hochstein, and Kyle Richards and Mauricio Umansky reveal about money, assets, financial independence, and what can happen when a marriage ends.

We also talk about the cultural double standard around women wanting financially successful partners, whether financial equality is possible when one person earns significantly more, and why reaching midlife can be the moment you finally ask yourself:

Where is my money—and how much control do I actually have over it?

• The difference between appearing rich and actually having wealth
• Why financial independence is about more than income
• Money, power and control inside marriage
• The financial risks of relying entirely on a partner
• Prenups, ownership and protecting yourself
• Why successful women are still judged for caring about a partner’s finances
• The biggest money mistakes women make in midlife
• Whether it’s ever too late to start building wealth
• What financial freedom can look like after 40 and 50
• Why having options may be the ultimate form of wealth

Pattie is also the author of Never Date a Broke Dude: The Financial Freedom Playbook and is known online as the Duchess of Decorum.

Follow Pattie:

Instagram: @duchessofdecorum

Website: PattieEhsaei.com

If you loved this conversation, follow The Iconic Midlife wherever you listen to podcasts, subscribe on YouTube, and follow @theiconicmidlife and @redcarpetroxy on social media.

And come back Thursday for Pattie’s game episode:

Rich Move or Broke Move?

I’m giving her financial dilemmas where the answer is definitely not as obvious as it sounds.

The Iconic Midlife

Hosted by Roxy Manning

New episodes weekly.