The Lost Cause Comedy Vault Vol. I copertina

The Lost Cause Comedy Vault Vol. I

The Lost Cause Comedy Vault Vol. I

Di: Sunnï Blu Stone
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Raw Comedy. Uncut. Unchained. Uncensored--And Unapologetic.
(Well, Almost.)
-Lost Cause.Unstoppable.Co Arti dello spettacolo Spettacoli cabaret
Episodi
  • PLANTA.

    PLANTA.
    Oct 25 2026
    PLANTA. Blū Tha Gürū Written/Produced by C'cxell Soleil The Complex Collective ©[The Festival Project ™ Unstoppable.Co]LYRICS/CYPHERIf Cudi isn’t getting paid to talk, he doesn’t;He took a cut up-front from one of this brother-cousins,It’s just another fun run,Everything the sun covers must become aProperty, possibly even a person—But that’s enough shop talkCudi got a motorcycle, gonna summon someoneProbably a bunch of ‘em,The cudi was a looker, a handsome husband typeBut love? Nah;Cudi didn’t want that—A quick kiss on an impulse:Uh, denied.A swift kick on theBubble butt—Woah,But he had to touch the boatWhile it was parked in the harbor—Hold on, broI probably need to call the doctorCause you’re swab sample is not back yetFrom Istanbul(Turkey!)Got Bigger Balls than thatBronze Bull on Wall Street!And sir, you’re full of MalarkyI might be begging your pardonCause you’re suspiciously scrumptious;What’s the motherfucker looking at meHoping that he’s getting lucky for?Cause I wore a cover up and only ordered coconut,Wore minimal makeup and I trust it’s just anotherUndercover cop, or government official tryna observe on myHovercraft,Brother that’s,Quite enoughI’m hollering out “Jesus Christ” and might have even dropped my hat,It took a couple days for him to text me back,So I decided Cudi probably might have been a plant(Not another one!)[Chorus]PLANTA.Man I’m so sick of theseIndustry hacks just tryna intercept myMasterpiece;Everytime I’m cooking up a recipe,They send me one of theseAnother brother-cousin-nephew-niece-Or neighbor happy to accept deliveriesIn exchange for causingMisery, giving me shiver-me-timber trees,And what I mean is, they’re axing and dismemberingThe creativity inside my memoryBy wearing and tearing on my vagus and anxietyIt’s not funny!Cause these plants is trying me,And I’m so fried, it’s like I’m acid trippingAin’t even the trial yet;I admit I tried to pass the time with just a smile, being quiet—But these weeds and vines keep climbing up so violently—For the sake of the rhyme,And also for the themePLANTA.This is just banta,Another fucking rant cause CudiHad tah try to get his hands down my pants,But—I just offered a backrub, cause I been dodging all these folks with camerasDamn—The flashbulbs slam meI got synesthesia;Famous isn’t easy, bruh!Especially when recently the only entertainment I been breaking out—Is solely on the underground, so I don’t know who’s hounding me!PLANTA.Playing paparazziPhantom—Plaza;Probably is a hazard,He’s so handsome,Hands up:Cudi got a shotgun—He left on a hot wheel,I left in a MazdaPLANTAProbably got a lot of flunkees;He left on a triumph,I left in a HumveePLANTA.All I wanted was for Cudi to love me,But an up and coming asset with an ass isnot so lucky;I was looking for a flower in all of this gardeningBut unfortunately, for me—there’s just weeds.…just weeds.PLANTA.For fuck’s sake.JOHN OLIVER Check it out, I’ve done something you’ll all very much like. SETH MEYERS Are you sure?JOHN OLIVERWe’ll, I’d bargain, JIMMY KIMMRL Bargain what?JOHN OLIVER Has anyone addressed you about your gambling addiction and that possibly, it’s starting to interfere with your work?JIMMY KIMMEL Not yet. JOHN OLIVER Well then, I won’t be the one to force it. Carrying on. [they all just sort of stand there awestruck; JIMMY KIMMEL finishes placing a bet on FANDUEL]JOHN OLIVER Please, gather round. JIMMY KIMMEL Why should we all have to “gather around” you?JOHN OLIVER Would it be more comfortable for you if I called it “a huddle” and told you that people might be placing bets on it?JIMMY KIMMEL ..,probably. JOHN OLIVER Alright, lads: huddle round, then! JIMMY KIMMEL That does sound better. SETH MEYERS Although, somewhat more homosexual. JOHN OLIVER And you’re protesting, Seth Meyers— to he whom has built his brand on the accessibility of metrosexuality?SETH MEYERS I’m not arguing. JIMMY KIMMEL He just called you gay. SETH MEYERS He said “metro” JIMMY KIMMEL But what does that mean?JOHN OLIVER Speaking of “almost”, it appears we may be one-off a host; does it seem like we might be missing something, or someone[all simultaneously in unison] no. Not—no. I don’t think so. No. No, probably not. JOHN OLIVER Very well, then. Let us carry on with our “huddle” [they all do, besides Jimmy Kimmel, who appears to be placing a bet on himself for being the last one into the huddle, before sliding his phone into his pocket, and displaying a very slow, small-stepped strut across the toom] Yo. Put me In The group chat. What? No Why not. You’re not in the strike force! Who says? Uh…The Strike Force. What does that even mean? You know what? I don’t know what it means. The Complex Collective ©[The Festival Project ™ Unstoppable.Co]
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    4 min
  • What Do U Do? (Single)

    What Do U Do? (Single)
    Oct 25 2026

    What Do U Do? (Single)


    Written, Composed & Produced by C’cxell Soleïl

    Performed as Blü Tha Gürū


    I am not done with you!

    I come from 102

    Reppin’ the 702, 310, 212!

    Bitch, what do you do?


    All day

    All day

    All day

    All day

    All day

    All day


    Horton is hearing a Who—?

    He like:

    “Blu!

    Bless you”

    (Thank you)

    Gazuntite, or –Salud

    Or–

    Was that a cough?

    Oh, well then:

    Fuck–

    –You.


    I move too fast,

    I confuse you,

    I fortune cookie, Confucius

    You jealous you cannot do this,

    I am the new bitch,

    You are the used shit


    Useless; fools gold

    I spend the money on new clothes

    Diamonds

    Peace over violence,

    But if the eye fits, Horus


    Scorecard:


    [Alan Cumming From Traitors Impression]

    (You are a boring person.)


    I am not done with you!

    I come from 102 (to 222)

    Reppin’ the 702, 310, 212-2-2

    Bitch, what do you do?


    Live from New York it is Saturday night

    I’m out in Brooklyn, these girls try to fight me

    Mad in Manhattan I’m all in my psyche

    I’m at the flagship of Nike

    Stay out of my way, I’m Michael Che

    Weekend update:


    All of my neighbors are haters

    I’m up in my lair, they call me a rake

    I’m practicing Rekei, you are unlikely candidate—

    –Right–

    To sit on my bike,

    Eh.

    Triangle; ∆

    I ride a bicycle, Peloton

    All in my jock strap

    She wanna nosh on my bagel, eh

    Make it a meal with some frito lay

    I am all that and a bag of chips

    [Right!]


    I am All That like I’m Keenan:

    King

    I write a novel like Stephen

    (King)

    I am a

    Thing 1 if you

    Seen 2

    Tell his ass that I don’t need ‘em,

    Eh!

    Pronto


    I bought my freedom, went north to Toronto

    I bought the farm, and then run me a bronco;

    Race horse

    –Quantize–

    Hooked on phonics,

    Flawless,

    Dark eyes–


    I am Sonic

    Supersonic

    Boss,

    I boss up on those proses

    Bought em

    Roses, Rolls Royce

    Rick roll those boys

    You’re so hopeless I roll both eyes

    I go postal

    On my notebook,

    You get Pomp-eyed

    I meant Pompeii

    Oops,

    I’m Kanye again–

    Cause I do this shit


    All day

    All day

    All day

    All day

    All day

    All day



    I am not done with you!

    I come from 102

    (U-U-U-U)

    Reppin’ the 702, 310, 2-1-2!

    Bitch, what do you do?


    All day

    All day

    All day

    All day

    All day

    All day


    The Complex Collective ©

    [The Festival Project ™ ]

    -Ū.



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    3 min
  • 012. {Living Strange} - The Lost Cause Comedy Vault [Vol. i]

    012. {Living Strange} - The Lost Cause Comedy Vault [Vol. i]
    Oct 25 2026
    The Lost Cause Comedy Vault Vol I. EP- XII
    {Living Strange} -Lost Cause

    The Complex Collective ©

    [The Festival Project ™ ]

    Unstoppable.Co
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    1 ora e 29 min
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