Homesickness

Tom and Meg talk through how homesickness shows up in boarding and day school settings, why it often appears a few weeks into term, and what staff can do to help students settle. They also cover staff wellbeing, emotional check-ins, parent communication, and simple routines that make a big difference. In this episode, Tom and Meg share practical ways to spot homesickness early, respond calmly, and match support to the student’s age and needs. The conversation is especially useful for boarding staff, but many of the ideas also apply to day-school drop-off anxiety.

Timestamps

(0:00) What this episode is about and why homesickness matters
(0:30) Why homesickness often appears after the first few settled weeks
(1:28) Comparing personal homesickness experiences
(3:51) Homesickness signs: tummy aches, feeling sick, and sleep issues
(4:20) Older students, embarrassment, and defiant behaviour
(6:49) International students, local boarders, and family distance
(7:46) How parents should talk to homesick children
(8:41) First response: calm the upset before trying to talk
(10:54) Distraction, physical activity, and team support
(11:26) Why side-by-side conversations can work better
(13:18) Giving students responsibility to build routine and connection
(14:18) Homesickness coming in waves across the school year
(16:41) Neurodiverse students, sensory changes, and routine disruption
(19:01) Formal and informal check-ins
(20:29) When to involve parents
(24:52) Colouring and quiet activities as calming tools
(25:52) Siblings and shared homesickness
(29:14) Homesickness in day schools and morning drop-off anxiety

Action items

• Notice early signs such as tummy aches, sleep trouble, or sudden defiance.
• Match your response to the student’s age and emotional state.
• Use simple grounding tools such as colouring, a walk, tea, or a small task.
• Keep routines predictable and give students appropriate responsibility.
• Log patterns and schedule follow-up check-ins.
• Tell parents what is going well, not only what is difficult.
• Use a calm, validating approach with day-school drop-off anxiety.

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