In this episode of the She Talks Confidence Podcast, Tony speaks with therapist Allison Brenner about self-awareness, confidence, feedback, hidden strengths, blind spots, and the gap between our intentions and our impact.

Allison explains how her Interview system helps people compare their self-perception with anonymous feedback from the people who experience them in different areas of life. The system gathers information across 14 skills and behaviors, offering insight into how you show up with family, friends, colleagues, leaders, mentors, and your wider community.

This conversation explores why we often guess how we came across in a meeting, relationship, or social situation, and how that uncertainty can lead to overthinking and self-doubt. Instead of treating feedback as a judgment or permanent label, Allison encourages curiosity and a willingness to understand the experience we create for others.

Allison and Tony discuss:

The difference between self-perception and external feedback

How hidden strengths can affect confidence and self-esteem

Why intention and impact don’t always match

The connection between self-awareness and relationships

How women can adjust their communication without abandoning who they are

Why “just be yourself” doesn’t account for context

How anonymous feedback can reveal patterns without shame

The importance of learning when to turn your personal “amplifier” up or down

How constructive feedback can support personal and professional growth

If you’ve ever wondered how you come across to other people, struggled with overthinking, or questioned whether your confidence matches the way others experience you, this episode offers a practical way to look at yourself with more clarity.

Three Biggest Takeaways

Self-awareness includes understanding your impact on other people.

Knowing your intentions isn’t enough. Confidence grows when you understand how your words, actions, and behaviors actually land with the people around you.

Feedback can reveal strengths you’ve been overlooking.

Other people may value you for qualities you don’t recognize in yourself. Learning about those hidden strengths can change how you see yourself and how confidently you move through the world.

Curiosity makes personal growth more useful than defensiveness.

Feedback isn’t a verdict on who you are. It reflects patterns in a particular season of your life and can help you decide what you want to strengthen, adjust, or express differently.

Contact Allison Brenner

Website: yourinnervue.com

And, you can use code: CONFIDENCE20 for 20% off Allison's program!

Allison Brenner shares that Interview is also available through social media platforms including Instagram, TikTok, LinkedIn, Facebook, and Threads under Your Interview.

Contact Tony

Website: theconfidencedoc.com

Email: tony@theconfidencedoc.com

Keywords

how you see yourself vs how others experience you, self-awareness, confidence, women and confidence, personal growth, external feedback, self-perception, blind spots, hidden strengths, intention vs impact, confidence for women, imposter syndrome, overthinking, perfectionism, emotional intelligence, communication skills, workplace confidence, women in leadership, relationships and communication, constructive feedback, anonymous feedback, personal development, professional development, organizational psychology, Interview assessment, understanding how others experience you, She Talks Confidence Podcast, Tony Dufresne, Allison Brenner